Role Play with Belatedbeliever1127
by FourEyedTurtle
Summary: A role play that Believer and I have been doing on Tumblr. Cover Image drawn by me.
1. Chapter 1

"Well, I don't normally hang out with strangers like this, but you don't seem so bad."

She held out her hand. "I'm Hope. What's your name?"

"Raphael," he said, taking the offered hand, "You don't seem so bad yourself."

She eyed him up and down.

"Hmm. You're one of those mutant people, huh?"

It had only been a few years since mutants had been discovered, and the humans were still getting used to them roaming around the streets.

"Guess I am," he said indifferently. Ever since it was acceptable for him to walk around in broad daylight, he heard this question so often, it no longer offended him. "So how about that drink, huh?

"Sure thing. Where do you have in mind?" The platinum haired girl queried. She made a mental note to ask about his mutation later, once they were more relaxed.

"I know a place that serves a mean plate of chili cheese fries. It's not far." He gestured down the street with a confident smirk.

"You know, Raphael, I have never had chili cheese fries before…" she admitted and started to follow him down the street. It was a semi-warm evening, and she had her yellow hooded jumper draped over her arm.

"You don't know what you're missin' then," he said as he pushed open an aluminum door that led into a busy bar. The patrons were mostly mutants, mingled with a handful of humans, all laughing, drinking and dancing with no thought of the different species. She looked around in awe. Nodding, impressed by his choice, she looked to him.

"This is great. Good choice," she smiled and sauntered into find a table.

"What're you drinking tonight?" he asked, ready to take her order to the tall frog-faced mutant tending the bar.

"Just a beer, thanks,"she smiled up at him. As he left to retrieve their drinks, she looked around the bar. If she was truthful to herself, she had stayed clear of the mutant scene ever since they'd become part of society. She felt a little out of place at the bar.

"There ya are. Plus an extra-large cheese fries," Raphael said, setting a frosty mug in front of her before setting down his own and a plate, overflowing with french fries, cheese, jalapenos and sour cream.

"Uh wow, thanks…" She was overwhelmed by his generosity. Gazing at his plate she remarked, "Huh, mutants sure eat a lot…" before clamping her hand over her mouth. She dared not look at him, not knowing what to expect from his reaction.

Raphael threw back his head and laughed loudly. "You think _this_ is a lot, you should see my little brother. Mikey can eat three of these." He took a long pull from his mug before setting it down with a satisfied sigh.

Hope smirked and chewed on a fry. "Is your brother a…" She waved her hand around looking for the right word. "Uh… What… What are you exactly…?"

"Give you three good guesses," he said sarcastically, grabbing a handful of fries and shoving them into his mouth. He wasn't really offended, but his rough, pugnacious nature made him sound irritated and insulted. Hope felt slightly uncomfortable at his response.

"Uh I dunno, man… You look like a tortoise…" She nervously chewed on another fry, hoping she hadn't offended him. She'd only ever met one other mutant, and that hadn't ended very well. Raphael smirked wryly.

"Turtle, actually, but good guess." He leaned back in his chair and swallowed another gulp of beer. "I've been called a frog, a lizard, even a freakin' gecko, but tortoise is new. You'd think the shell would be a dead giveaway."

Hope stifled a snort. "A turtle. Okay." She wasn't trying to be rude, but she came across that way.

Raph liked this girl. She had spunk, and he appreciated that in a person, human or mutant. "So what about you? What are you?" he asked facetiously, wiping a smear of chili and cheese off his lip.

Hope scoffed. "I'm a human. Just a normal human, no mutations… That I know of…" She smirked and pointed down at the almost empty plate. "These are really great. Good shout!" She praised.

Raph drained his mug and set it down heavily on the table. "Whatever you do, don't try to put those on a pizza. Trust me, it's _not_ a good combo." He waved his hand in a forbidding gesture, emphasizing the word 'not'.

"Why would anyone… put fries on a pizza…?" She questioned suspiciously, eyeing the turtle.

"My brother thinks he's some kind of culinary genius when it comes to making pizza," Raph said irritably, grabbing a fry and scraped up a glob of chili with it. "One time, he put hot sauce, hot fudge, and Red Hots on a pizza because he wanted to make the ultimate hot pizza." He shook his head and sighed as he dropped the fry into his mouth.

"You're brother sounds like a riot!" Hope chuckled, finishing off her plate. She stared down at it. Was now the time to ask? "So, uh, if you don't mind me asking, Raphael, how did you come to be a mutant… turtle…?"

Raphael sighed, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly. "It's… a really long story." He looked up and smiled as she leaned forward expectantly, eager to hear more. "My father bought my brothers and me from a pet shop and was taking us home when he ran into some guys he knew were up to no good."

Hope leaned further forward, realizing this was going to be an interesting story. She waved her hand to show she wanted to hear more.

He smiled, flattered by her interest. "Turns out, they were the Kraang in their robot suits, handing off some mutagen. You remember the Kraang?"

"Oh yeah. I was one of the lucky citizens with a sexy Kraang head for a short while." She recalled. "But go on…"

"Well, they saw that my dad was following 'em and were gonna kill him. He fought them off and kicked their metal asses single handed." His voice was laced with pride. He knew how hard it was to defeat those freaky aliens, especially alone, and Splinter had done it holding a bowl full of baby turtles. "But they dropped the mutagen they were carrying and Splinter stepped into it. When he started changing, he dropped our bowl, and we got covered in the stuff too."

"Oh… So you weren't human before you got mutated…?" She asked curiously. "Did your Dad… mutate into a turtle too?" She was starting to like this guy. Anyone who had this much enthusiasm while talking about their parent was alright in her book.

"Nope," he replied shortly. "I've always been a turtle. As for Splinter… well, a rat ran by his foot before the fight with the Kraang. Now he's a giant rat." He stood up with a groan and gestured to her drink. "I'm gonna get a refill. Want one?"

"Sure," she replied quickly, mulling over his story. Sure, it was weird, but looking around the bar, there were probably loads of different stories about how people got mutated in the first place. She decided not to grill him further about it and thought of the perfect subject to replace it with.

Raphael returned to the table, placing a new mug of frothy beer in front of her. Some of the amber liquid sloshed over the side and spilled on the polished wooden surface.

"Dammit, sorry," he apologized gruffly, mopping at the mess with a handful of paper napkins. He silently cursed his shaking hands. At least the girl hadn't fled in fear of him yet. That kind of thing still happened, even with mutants slowly becoming accepted in society, and Raph could help but be surprised that Hope had stuck with him this long.

"It's cool," she smiled. "So… Do you think the mutant marriage law will be passed?" She blurted. It was the talk of the city at that time. Whether or not mutants should be allowed to marry not only each other, but humans too. What with Hope not having really conversed with a mutant before, she just had to hear his opinion.

He blinked. She seriously wanted to talk about that? Donnie has spoken about it at length, which was the only reason Raph knew much about it. Mutants being recognized as citizens had been a battle in itself, but now they were talking about marriage. Something that Raph had never thought would happen to him. To combat his uncertainty, he chuckled sardonically. "Is that a proposal?"

Hope was not in any way ready for his reply. "Woah… What?!" She stammered. "No! Jeez, man." She felt her face burning. "I've just never had the chance to actually discuss it with a… mutant." She scratched the back of her head.

He waved his head, with a sigh. "Sorry… that was outta line." He cupped his sweating mug with both hands staring intently at the foamy liquid. "I dunno what to think about it," he admitted, "My brother's in love with this girl… and marrying her would make him really happy. I want that for him, but other than that, it doesn't matter much to me if someone like me can get married…" He stopped, pursing his lips awkwardly.

Hope cocked an eyebrow at him. "The same brother who tried to make the world's hottest pizza… is in love with a girl…? Interesting." She smirked. "You've got no one… special then?"

"Nah, nobody like that." he said, shaking his head. "And Donnie's the one in love with April, not Mikey. All three of them have been crazy about a girl at one time or another. Just too much trouble for me."

Hope held her hand up to stop him. "Hold up, hold up, man. How many brothers do you have…?" Her head was starting to feel a little woozy with the alcohol and the sudden mention of a few different names was confusing her. He grinned mischievously, recognizing the first signs of drunkenness in her face.

"I've got three brothers. Leo's the oldest, then me, then Donnie, then Mikey."

"And you're all... tortoises... Turtles...?" She asked, starting to feel a lot more relaxed. Bringing the glass to her lips, she took a large swig, leaving a dash of foam on her nose.

"Yep," he replied, leaning back nonchalantly in his seat. "We're all walking, talking, mask-wearing turtles." He was glad that Hope had decided to come with him to get drinks. The last few times he had asked a girl out, she had screamed and run in fear of him. It was nice to have a human girl look past his appearance and treat him like a real person.

"Yeah… I was gonna ask about the mask… But you know, I thought it might be too personal. Had to get the mutations, family, and marriage proposals out of the way first!" She joked, sloshing her beer around, giggling. She never thought that she would ever get to have fun with a… mutant. This guy… he was starting to sway her opinions of the new race.

Raph fidgeted with the tattered tails of his mask subconsciously. "My dad gave them to us when we were kids… something about how the colors reflect our personalities or something like that." He made himself put his hands back on the table and willed himself to keep them still.

She narrowed her eyes at him, gazing at his scarred hands. "So… red for danger? Anger…?" Mulling this over out loud she realized she had indeed hit a sensitive nerve with him. "Sorry, man. You don't need to talk about it. I'm just being nosey. My family… are really…" she brought her voice down to a whisper. "… Anti-Mutant. They would flip their lids if they knew I was in this place."

He was silent for a long time, staring thoughtfully at the table top. Part of him wondered if Hope's family was part of those radical anti-mutant leagues that picketed mutant rights rallies or threatened violence against mutants. Raph recalled the vegetables that had been thrown at him, the terrible slurs and jeers. He wasn't afraid of those people, but he felt the same way he did when his family had to hide in the sewers just to survive.

"And what do you think of us?" he heard himself asking quietly, unable to meet her gaze.

They had literally just met. She'd never had this deep a conversation with a human, let alone a mutant. She nursed her glass, trying to think of the right answer, before sighing and being honest with him.

"Curious." She let the word leave her lips and tasted it. Yes, it was how she felt. Looking up from her drink she continued. "I have to be honest with you, Raphael, I was dead set against you guys having any sort of rights for a long time."

Hearing the admission felt like a punch to his gut. While he admired her bluntness, it hurt to think that this girl may not think have considered him to be a person. After all, he didn't look like a human, why should he be treated like one? "I should go," he grunted sullenly, rising from the table.

"Wait." She sighed, grabbing his arm. "I meant what I said… about being curious. My family… are anti-mutation. But I always was… well… curious." She kept a hold of his arm, feeling how rough his skin was. "I never had the chance to speak to one… to a mutant… before. Stay, please."

There was a long paused, only filled with the buzzing of the busy patrons. Finally, he retook his seat. "When I was a kid… my dad told us that humans were dangerous, and that if they found us, they would want to hurt us." Raphael muttered resignedly. "When we met April, we started to learn that not all humans were bad. There were terrible ones, yeah. Ones who called us names, who screamed in our faces and threw things at us. But there were humans who gave us a chance… to be more than just mutants."

Hope nodded sadly. "Yes. And I've been around those dangerous humans. I guess… I just wanted to see for myself." She hid a smile, know that she was definitely swayed by him. "Let me get the next round." She announced and got up from her seat.

"Sure," he said and watched as she maneuvered her way through the crowd toward the bar. Tipping his mug up, he swallowed the remainder of his beer and wiped the remnants off his snout with the back of his hand. He hadn't spoken this openly with anyone about how different he was, especially not with a human. But somehow, he trusted this girl. She wasn't going to throw it back in his face. He was sure of that.

"There." She carefully placed his mug down. Taking a large swig from her own, emptying almost half the glass, she finally sat down. "Look, man. I am not a bad person." She let out a less than feminine belch and clicked her tongue. "Just. You know. Give me a chance to understand?"

Raph smirked, impressed at the length and volume of the belch as he looked her over. Her face was earnest, her eyes pleading. She genuinely did want to understand him, he could feel it. Grasping his mug, he raised it towards hers. "Second chances aren't really something I'm good at, but I'll make an exception. Since you asked nicely."

A big smile spread across her lips. "Well, thank you." She took another small sip of her beer, feeling the alcohol really rush to her head now. "Here's how I see it. You got bad mutants. But you also got bad humans. In all honesty, mutants aren't any different from humans. At least that's what I tried to tell my family before they kicked me out-" she stopped abruptly, very aware of just how deep she was going here.

The smirk instantly fell away. They had kicked her out for sympathizing with mutants? Anger towards Hope's family began clouding his mind, tinging his vision with red. His hand tightened so hard on his mug, his knuckles turned white. "That's freaking wrong. You oughta stand up to 'em."

She sighed deeply and met his green eyes. "My brother… was mutated." She admitted. "He went totally crazy. I mean bat shit insane. My parents… they locked him in our cellar." She paused here to take in his reaction.

Raphael's stomach turned at the inhumane treatment her brother had gone through at the hands of his own parents. His jaw set and the faint tinge of red in his vision deepened to a hazy cloud. "Ah, jeez. I'm sorry, kid. When did it happen?"

"Within the first few months of the mutant rights rallies." She hung her head. It wasn't especially easy to talk about, even more so that she hadn't actually told him the worst part. But his reaction was so fiery, so raw, that she couldn't bear to go on. "So…" She hastened to change the subject. "What do you do then? Do you and your brothers have jobs?"

He decided to let the subject slide. The pain in her eyes betrayed just how raw the wounds were.

"Leo started his own dojo a little bit after the first citizenship laws were passed. He's only got about five students, but the kids are loving that they can learn to be ninjas. Donnie's working on his degree in mechanical engineering, but he knows all that stuff anyway. He just wanted to go to school and get the degree. And Mikey…. he's doing his own web show out of our kitchen. Some kind of 'adventurous cooking', but I'd never eat that crap." He swallowed more of the beer and choked back a hiccup. "And I'm a bouncer at a club a few blocks from here. Not great work but the pay's good, and sometimes I get to rough up some of the sickos who get too close to the girls."

Listening deeply to his words, she nodded. "It sounds like you guys really landed on your feet. I mean, I wasn't even aware there were mutants for so many years, you must've been in hiding, huh?" Her glass clinked on her teeth, telling her that it was empty, again. Her head was spinning slightly. "Well…" She partially slurred. "I think that's enough alcohol for one night." He put out her hand. "Raphael, it was wonderful to meet you." Her blue eyes shone, albeit slightly glazed over.

"Yeah, it is getting late," Raph said, rising to his feet. "I can walk you home if you want." He offered with a smile.

Hope exhaled swiftly and pursed her lips. "I kind of… um…" She hesitated, her cheeks flushing. "I don't really have a home…" Her eyes darted to everywhere, but his. "I sleep in my Lab."

 _Wow, this girl really can't catch a break_ , Raph thought as he helped her to stand. She swayed a little on her feet and he steadied her. "We have an extra room at our place. I don't wanna leave you alone like this." he said, concerned in spite of himself. He could tell she was tough; he could see it in her eyes, but she could find herself in danger if her brain was fogged by the effects of alcohol. In this city, anything could happen.

"What? No, don't be ridiculous, man!" She batted him away. "I've got a nice little set up. It's actually quite nice. I'm never late for work!" She joked awkwardly. The truth was, she did want to sleep in a proper bed, but she had just met this guy. And as interesting as he'd been, she couldn't fully trust him.

He flushed brightly, annoyed at his own stupidity. _Of course she wouldn't go home with a guy, or mutant, she just met… What the hell is wrong with you?_ Clearing this throat, he said with as much dignity as he could muster, "I get it. Can I walk you back anyway?" He wanted to make up for his careless suggestion in any way he could. Seriously, in what possible world had such an offer been okay?

Mulling this over in her tipsy state, she came to a conclusion. "You know what, Raphael Turtle, I think you should walk me back. I've been having some issues with the… neighbors recently. A big strong… uh… you… Would help." Hope was useless with words at the best of times, let alone when she had alcohol in her system. She often came off rude or speciesist, but in reality, she struggled with how she came across to people.

Raph offered her his arm, wondering just how much trouble these neighbors might be giving her. If any of them said even one snide word to her, he would punch them into next week. "So where's your lab?" he asked, raising his voice a little to be heard over a laughing couple who were standing nearby.

"It's just down the street." She replied, worrying about how he'd react when he saw it. They paced arm in arm down the road until they arrived at a small warehouse with a sign above it that read: **Brevin Laboratories**. She gazed up at it fondly. "It's not much. There's just me. But it works and it makes me happy." Scrawled across the door was some vulgar graffiti that sported the words MUTANT HATER. She sighed irritably at the message. "This happens a lot. I've given up scrubbing it off."

Raph stared at the scrawled message for a long moment, contemplating what it could mean. Why would anyone believe she hated mutants? Did it have anything to do with what she'd said about how she hadn't wanted them to have rights for a long time? Sighing, he let go of her arm and turned to her.

"Got your key?" he asked gruffly.

Yep, that was exactly the reaction she expected. Now he wanted nothing more to do with her. She nodded and started to fumble in her shoulder bag until she found the key. Sliding it into the lock, she turned back to him and attempted a smile.

"Thanks, man. I really needed this." She yanked the large sliding door across and it opened with a clang to relieve a small lab bathed in darkness.

Raph saw shadows of a lot of different types of lab equipment, not knowing what any of it did. "No problem." He said shortly. He noticed the sad shame in her face, her attempt at a smile that wouldn't have convinced a baby. Impulsively, he asked, "Got a pen?"

"Uh… sure?" She hesitated, confused as to why he wasn't bolting. She clicked on the lights and the full array of equipment was illuminated. The walls were papered with charts and X-rays, there was a large DNA model half assembled in the corner and her desk was strewn with papers, filled with writings and various genetic drawings. Finding a pen amongst the mess, she handed it to him, a shadow of curiosity waved her face.

Taking the pen, Raph took her hand and scrawled a series of numbers on her palm. "If any of those 'neighbors' give you any trouble again, or if you wanna go get another beer, give me a call." he said as he handed the pen back to her.

"I, uh, yeah, sure…" Hope stuttered. She'd never gotten anyone's phone number before. Wondering what she could possibly have done to make someone give a damn about her, she slowly walked him to the door. "You're a good guy." She commented as he turned to leave.

"You're not so bad yourself." He replied with a smirk as he stepped out into the night. He gave her a little wave before turning and walking up the street toward home. Hopefully, Hope would call him. He didn't have a lot of human friends besides April, Casey and a few guys from work, and he liked what he saw in her. He'd never admit it to anybody, but he hoped that she liked what she saw in him too.

Hope gazed at the digits scrawled on her hand for a moment, then immediately started copying it down on a crumpled piece of paper. Looking around the lab for a safe place to put it, she settled for one of the pegs which would normally hold a string of X-rays. "There." She said triumphantly. Deep down in her mind, she secretly hoped to be bothered by her God-awful neighbors, just for the excuse to call him.


	2. Chapter 2

Raph's T-Phone buzzed loudly on his bedside table. Groaning, he rolled over and glanced at his alarm clock. Almost seven in the morning. Who the hell would be calling him at this time of the day? He checked the caller ID, didn't recognize the number. He considered hanging up, but thought that it might be one of the guys at work, asking him to take his shift. Raph needed the hours, so he hit the green call button. "Hello?" he croaked.

"This better be freakin' good, Pres," Raph said, listening to the anxious voice of one of the other bouncers at the club on the line. He pulled himself reluctantly out of bed and stumbled into the bathroom. "Spare me the excuses. When's the shift start?" He splashed a little water on his face to take the edge of the fog still clouding his mind. "Yeah, I'll be there, but you owe me, Pres." He hung up and started brushing his teeth. He was secretly disappointed that it hadn't been Hope who had called him. At least that meant she wasn't in trouble, which was a good thing.

Raph grabbed a frozen waffle and threw it in the toaster. Pulling open a cabinet, he got out a chipped mug and poured him a steaming mug of coffee. Donnie, who was sleeping with his head resting on the kitchen table, surrounded by five large textbooks, was jarred awake by the sound. He sat up, looked around blearily for a moment, then laid his head down and began to snore again. Raph was very glad that he had decided not to mess with school. Finals week looked awful. Grabbing the waffle and downing the remainder of the coffee in a gulp, he jogged out of the kitchen and to the turnstiles. While the shift he'd agreed to take over for Pres didn't start until later, the meeting with his parole officer was at ten, and if he missed that, he could end up back in lockup.

* * *

Hope awoke early that morning. The beginnings of a hangover were kicking in. She had so much work to do today, but she seriously didn't want to get up. Images of meeting Raphael were playing on her mind. She shook her head violently. "What is wrong with me?" She groaned out loud.

Finally rolling out of the tattered mattress that served as her bed, she scraped her long blonde hair into a bun and set about getting to work. It was at that moment she heard loud banging on the warehouse door. "Oh for… Not today… Please…" She mumbled to herself, pinching the bridge of her nose.

"Ugh," moaned Hope as she glared at the door. Whoever was making that racket was not letting up. Giving in, she slipped open the bolt and creaked the door open a crack. No one was around. "Huh?" Hope squeezed herself out in the open and was suddenly pummeled with eggs. They cracked all down her face and stung her eyes.

"Anti-mutant!" "Vile mutant hater!" "We don't want to be human again!" Three mutants were verbally tearing into her. Hope held up her hands as they continued cursing her.

The last of the eggs were aimed at her face. Hope was having a hard time seeing now, as the thick liquid nipped at her eyes. "Enough!" She shrieked and hastily turned to get back into her lab. That's when one of the bullies grabbed her by the hair and slammed her head into the warehouse door. She slumped to the ground, unconscious.

* * *

Damn it, he was going to be late. Why did Hal's office have to be clear on the other side of Midtown? Taking a taxi was too expensive and it was faster to walk than trying to take the bus or the subway. Especially since the rooftops were still his favorite express route. They'd been quite effective back in the day. He sprinted over the tar papered roofs, the cool morning air feeling cool on his skin. Suddenly, he heard a lot of shouting on the street below, some protesting cries. This made him stop in his tracks and turn sharply toward the sound of the disturbance. Pretty gutsy for muggers to be working in broad daylight. He needed to step in before someone got seriously hurt; crew the condition of his parole.

Raph landed in the alley in time to hear the loud thud of something hard hitting metal. Looking up, he saw a tall blonde girl lying in a heap, her hair concealing most of her face and surrounded by three burly mutants. Shattered eggs were everywhere, mostly on the girl herself, and the cartons lay forgotten on the ground. She groaned softly in pain, and Raph instantly recognized her voice. _Hope?_ The mutant with lobster claws was bending over her, the sharp tip hovering over her throat.

"Back off!" Raph shouted, charging forward with no thought that these guys might be armed. The lobster mutant spun away from Hope and slashed wildly at Raph's face. The turtle blocked the attack and punched him twice in the stomach. The mutant went down and Raph kicked him under the chin, knocking him onto his back, out cold.

"What are you doing, man?" asked the mutant with the face of a Jack Russell terrier, "You're one of us! You should be helping us take out mutant hating scum, not protecting them!"

"Yeah!" agreed the little lizard man, nodding fervently. Raph turned on them, his eyes flashing with fury.

"What you guys are doing makes you just as bad as the humans that might have hurt you. Now get out of here, and take your friend with you." he nodded flippantly at the unconscious form of the lobster man. Swallowing nervously, the dog and the lizard supported the lobster to his feet and shuffled away.

As soon as they were out of sight, Raph knelt down and gently put his fingers to the side of Hope's neck. He relaxed a little when he felt the beat of her pulse. Carefully, he lifted her into a bridal carry and took her back inside of the lab. Seeing a patchy mattress in a back room, Raph laid her down and gently covered her with her blanket. He noticed the bruise already starting to form on the side of her face as he pulled out his T-Phone and dialed Hal's number. _He's going to have my ass for this_ , he thought sullenly to himself as the call connected.

"Hey, it's Raph. Listen. Can we reschedule? Something came up…"

* * *

Nothing was in focus… Hope awoke from the oddest dream… As her eyes finally adjusted she was aware that she was in bed. However, something just didn't sit right with the scene. As she endeavoured to sit up, her head split open with a sharp twinge.

"What the…?" The perplexed girl slurred. The memory of the scrap outside the laboratory flitted around in her mind. But how did she get back into her bed…?

Raph was sitting in a rickety aluminum chair near a small refrigerator when he saw Hope stirring out of the corner of his eye. Finally, she was waking up. Swiftly, he knelt down by the mattress and pressed a package of frozen peas to the swelling on her face. She started in surprise at the compress and he was quick to console her. "Easy there… you're okay. How're ya feelin'?"

"Raphael…? I don't… understand. Did I call you?" The dazed girl croaked. She was still too disorientated to actually piece together what had happened. Swaying slightly, she had several theories, most of which pointed to the conclusion that she was still dreaming.

"Nah. I was nearby and heard your neighbors givin' you trouble." He was hesitant to explain why he was in the area, but he was sure that she wasn't really interested in that at the moment anyway. "Good thing I was," he said shortly, readjusting the cold compress to cover more of the darkening bruise. "Those guys were out for blood."

Hope gazed up at him, a blank stare planted on her face. "I don't… get it… Why were you here?" She shook her head fiercely. "I'm fine. I can handle myself." She suddenly snapped, pushing him away. Feeling deeply embarrassed by the whole situation, she didn't want to seem weak to him.

Raph's temper flared at her blunt dismissal. "Well, if that's what you call handling yourself, I'd say you're doing a hell of a job!" He stood up and stepped away from the mattress, every ounce of will power focused on calming himself down.

"No. No. I'm sorry." She pressed her temples in with her fingers. "I have… issues… that I really don't want to get into." She looked up into his emerald eyes. "Thank you. For saving me." Attempting a generous smile, she brought her knees to her chest.

He sighed, allowing the remainder of his anger to melt away. "Don't we all?" Walking over to the sink, he grabbed a plastic cup and filled it with water. "So don't mention it. How's your head?" he asked as he handed her the cup.

"Sore." She gave him a lopsided smile. "I can't remember what happened. Just that they were throwing eggs at me, and shouting abuse." Taking the water and nodding her thanks, she thirstily gulped it down.

"Bastards," he muttered as he pulled the chair up and sat down in it. "Well, I don't think those guys will bother you again. If they do, I'll pound them into the ground like a tent stake." He looked smug as he locked his fingers behind his head and leaned back in the chair.

Hope blinked a couple of times as she stared up at him. "You're quite... uh... fiery..." Finding a tame word for 'violent' was a chore, but she didn't want to offend him.

Raph laughed at her description. "Yeah. I get that a lot. My temper always gets me in a lot of trouble." He shrugged sardonically, keeping his eyes on the ceiling. "But usually, just threatening a lot of the 'tough guys' is enough to scare 'em off. They don't really wanna fight. They just want to impress their friends by pushing around the weaker ones."

"Hmm." She nodded in agreement. "You're wise too." Lying back onto her mattress she sighed deeply. "I had so much work planned today. Looks like that's a write off."

"Yeah, a mild concussion might be reason enough to take the day off," he said with a sidelong glance. The left side of her face was slowly turning purple and her eye was starting to swell. "You should get some rest. You hit your head pretty hard back there."

Sitting up abruptly, she shook her head violently. "No! No, what I need is-" Her eyes lit up, she was on the verge of a breakthrough. Bolting up and running around her lab, collecting various pads of paper, recently scribbled notes and what appeared to be a test tube full of tea leaves, she started rambling at Raphael.

"You know the substance that mutates things, right? Mutagen?" She slapped her forehead. "What am I thinking, of course you do!" She poured the test tube contexts into her mouth. "Herb remedy, helps me think. Now! Last year, they discovered retro-mutagen. The stuff that UN-mutates you." She grabbed onto the arms of his chair, staring into his face with wild eyes. "That stuff basically, removes the mutant gene, puts you back to what you were before." Darting around the lab again holding her hand above her head, as if addressing a large audience, she turned dramatically. "The mutant population were disgusted with it. But you gotta remember! Not all mutants are the same! No! The ones like you, Raphael, you've been this for a long time, most of your life. So you're used to it. It's normal for you. But someone who just got mutated, they might not want to stay that way. And that was what retro-mutagen was for!" She placed her hands on his shoulders. "You with me so far?" She asked, her eyes filled with passion for her work.

He stared at her, dizzy from all of her frantic scurrying. "Uh… Sure?" He said a little uncertainly. The look on her face was the same one that Donnie got when he was consumed by some nerd thing that got him really excited, so he knew that she would explain, even if he didn't follow.

She nodded and pushed herself away from him. "Good. Now. What I was trying to do, was take a strand of the retro-mutagen, and modify it. What I was trying to achieve was essentially a drug…" She paused and turned to face him again. "Not a bad drug!" She backtracked. "You've seen what happens when people mutate, they lose part of themselves. They become… well… some of them… become… monsters." She cringed at her choice of word. "No… Just, you know. They get angry and violent."

Struggling furiously with her words, Hope wiped her sweating brow. "Oh, man. Anyway. The drug I was trying to perfect, suppressed that anger, whatever you wanna call it. It made them more… well… human." Again she sauntered over to him and got really close to his face. "And it worked." She whispered. "But now the mutant community think I'm trying to oppress them. That I want to take away their mutantism. But they don't get it…" She swallowed hard. "I was just trying to help my brother."

Raph understood all too well what she was trying to do. He'd seen a lot of mutants give into the rage that came with being mutated and allow themselves to be consumed by it. He'd fought against them when his family had been in hiding, and when they were allowed to come into the light, he'd been among them. It had been like repaying the people who'd made him feel like less than nothing his whole life, and it had felt good. But it came at a cost all the same. One that had taken three long years of his life.

His had been a conscious decision to be angry and resentful, though there were just as many who were driven crazy by the mutagen. The ones that the humans truly feared and locked up in cages like the animals they believed they were. Those were the ones Hope was trying to help, and she was being demonized for it. Pulling himself out of his reverie, he nodded thoughtfully. "I know about doing whatever it takes to help your brother. I've had to do it a lot over the years."

Hope gawped at him in disbelief. "You… understand? You actually understand why I'm doing this?" Forgetting herself, she stepped forward and flung her arms around him in a tight embrace. No one, not even her family had supported her. She knew that her work would help thousands though, and she had persevered through the abuse, the neglect from her relatives. "You don't understand what this means to me." The relief that someone finally agreed with her, was overwhelming.

He was completely taken aback by the sudden embrace and he stood frozen, unsure of what he should do. Should he hug her back? As a rule, he didn't deal with mushy emotional stuff, so he was seriously in the dark. Thankfully, she pulled back before he could figure it out. All he could think to say was: "Uh… you're welcome?" _Real smooth_ , _Raph_ , he chided himself.

"Oh man, I'm sorry. That was… so forward…" She mumbled. "Listen… I do have a proposition for you. And of course you are 100% entitled to refuse. It's just… you're the first mutant I've ever met…. that's… you know… normal…" again, wrong choice of words. "Godammit, Hope." She cursed herself. "The drug works. I told you that. But what I'm working on right now… well it's not going anywhere." She scrunched up her nose and chanced a look at the turtle. "It's not going anywhere because I need to do tests. On mutant blood. Preferably one that was not previously human…"

She knew she was asking way more than enough from him. She never set out for this to happen. After all, he was the one who approached her. He was the one who asked her for a drink. And he was the one who walked her home, saved her, and was now sitting in her lab listening to her ramble on. She knew she could make her theory a reality. She just needed some help.

Hope held up her hand as he opened his mouth. "Don't answer yet. Go. Think about it. Just. Please, give me a chance."

He closed his mouth as his mind raced a hundred miles an hour. She didn't seem like one of those crazy geneticists like Falco. She wasn't going to turn him into some kind of monkey creature. Or at least he hoped not.

"What? Are you wanting to stick me with that anti-anger stuff you made?" he asked cynically, crossing his arms.

"What? No!" Hope sounded genuinely shocked. "All I'd need is a blood sample. I'm not going to experiment on you, if that's what you're thinking." She narrowed her blue eyes at him. "I'm not that kind of scientist." Picking up a vial of clear liquid, she spoke in a delicate whisper. "I'm trying to create… something else."

Raph's brow furrowed in confusion at her vague explanation. "What is it that you're trying to make then? Some other kind of retromutagen?" It had taken Donnie months to create even a little of the stuff, and that clear liquid didn't look anything like what Raph recalled retromutagen looking like.

Hope sighed, reached for her lab coat and dressed herself. It made her feel comfortable; herself. "Okay. Okay." She shuffled up to a large chart of the wall. It presented a detailed diagram of mutant DNA. "See here." She pointed at a blue strand. "This part represents the mutant section of the DNA helix. And this red part is the other section, whatever you were before you mutated." Stepping back to let him see the full diagram, she continued. "As you know, the retro-mutagen effectively deletes the blue part, turning you back into whatever you were before you mutated." Now she was getting nervous. She really worried about his reaction. But she needed him to understand. "This-" she gestured towards another poster. "- is human DNA. And what I want to do is essentially merge the retro-mutagen and this…" She jingled the small vial. "This is a concoction I created. If I successfully merge these two substances together, any mutant taking it, would turn… human." She held up her hand again. "Hear me out. It means that if there are any mutants out there who mutated with a human, you, for example, who have started to enjoy the feeling of being a person, part of society, could lose their mutant part and become human. It means that everyone can make their own choices about who they want to be. Full freedom of expression."

Raph stared at the mutant DNA poster, trying to process what she had just said. She could make him… human? Was that even possible? And even if he helped her and she did make the stuff, would he want to be human? It was definitely a tempting thought, not being stared at or judged based on what he looked like. But… there had to be a down side. There always was. He turned away from the poster, looking directly into her large eyes. She was so full of hope that this would work, so confident that she could do it. And if she couldn't… well, it was just a little bit of his blood. It was worth a shot.

"Okay," he said thoughtfully, "How much blood do you need?"

"You… Really?!" Hope was about to keep going, desperate to make him understand. "Just a sample, one test tube would do." She didn't know how to thank him. "What… What would you want in return?" Hope asked enthusiastically.

Raph laughed at her eagerness. "Tell ya what. You let me take you to dinner next week and we'll call it even." He settled himself back in his chair, almost expecting her to backpedal out of a second date.

"It's a deal! But… If I may make one little adjustment. _I_ should be taking _you_ to dinner. As a thank you." She grinned. He was unbelievable, she'd only just met him, and he was being cooperative.

 _Now she's speaking my language_. "Deal." he confirmed with a nod. "Let's get this done. Not really a fan of needles, so we should do this before I back out."

"Oh, I can help with that too." She pulled out a small jar of what looked like boiled sweets. "Take one of these. They numb any area that senses pain. Made them myself. But they take months to make." She wandered to a cupboard and pulled out a needle encased in plastic.

"Uh, okay," he said, fishing out a pale yellow piece from the jar. He popped it into his mouth, surprised that it was, indeed, sweet like candy on his tongue. "So what kind of scientist are you exactly?" he asked as she approached with the needle. Maybe if he focused on her and the conversation, he could forget about that needle.

Ripping the needle out the packet and clicking it into a tube, she walked briskly over to him. "I'm a geneticist. Back in the days before mutants, I was working on a series of, uh, for lack of a better word, cures, for rare hereditary diseases. But after the mutant unveiling, I switched my field to mutation studies." She gently inserted the needle into his arm, knowing that he couldn't feel a thing. "It seemed like the right thing to do, after my brother. I wanted to help. But it seemed a lot of people didn't want my help." She finished up. "All done."

"Yeah, a lot of the mutants I've seen don't want anyone thinking they're something that needs to be cured. They're proud that they're different." He watched her as she wrote something on the vial and placed it among several others on her desk.

"Well what I'm doing, trying to do, is be there for the minority who don't. Even if that does mean constant abuse." Hope truly believed in what she was doing. If Raphael knew the whole truth about her brother, he'd understand more, but for some strange reason, he didn't need to motivation.

Raph nodded, seeing her conviction as clearly as if it were written in neon lights. "Well, if you're willing to take that risk, I'll be there to make sure you don't get hurt." He stood, catching sight of the LED clock on her counter. "Shit! I'm late!" he swore, turning quickly toward the door.

"Late for what…?" Hope asked, stepping back as he reached the door.

"Said I'd cover a shift at work," he said shortly as he reached the door. "I'd invite you to come with, but it's not really a good place for a nice girl like you."

She snorted. "It's okay, man. I have loads to do. Thanks to your… donation." She smiled gratefully. "Knock 'em dead! Well, no, but… you know what I mean." She scratched the back of her head, pulling half her hair out of the messy bun. "Just go!" She laughed.

"Okay, okay! I'm goin'!" Raph pulled the door open but paused just in front of the threshold. "Hey, call me if there's any more trouble." His voice was tight, making it clear that it wasn't a request.

She shut the door behind him and leaned against it. He was the first proper friend she'd ever had. Besides her brother. There was something about Raphael that really put her at ease. Made her feel safe. She decided there and then, that she was going to hang on to him. And what was more, they had actually arranged to meet again, for dinner, so she didn't even need to think up an excuse to call him.

Raph spent the whole night thinking about Hope's experiments, and what it could mean for mutants like him. He couldn't even focus on the shows that the girls were putting on, not even Lucy's G.I. Jane routine. It was possible that maybe, one day, he could be human. It could mean a normal life. No more hiding, no more fighting, no more ugly, scaly, green skin. Every time he saw his reflection in one of the mirrors near his post, he wondered what he might look like with a nose, or ears, or hair. _Forget about it, man. It might not happen for years. You might as well just be glad for what you got._ When he left at 4 a.m., he chose to walk home instead of trying to hail a cab. As he trudged slowly up the sidewalk, his mind was busy with endless 'what-ifs'.


	3. Chapter 3

For the rest of the week, Hope hardly slept. She put every ounce of herself into trying to work out her theory. Endless nights of scribbling down her hypothesis, only for it to be debunked with one simple mistake. Her mind often wandered to Raphael, and whether or not he was thinking of her. Whether or not he had remembered their dinner. Whether or not he had contemplated her offer. But she always abruptly stopped herself, and got stuck back in to her research.

On the morning of it reaching a week since they'd spoken, she plucked up the courage to text him.

 **[text] I hope I haven't woken you. Are you up for dinner tonight? Hope.**

Her finger hovered over the 'x' button, but she thought better of it.

* * *

"Thanks, Hal. See ya next month." Raph closed the door of his parole officer's office behind him and released an irritated sigh. He hated these meetings, but they were going to be a reality for him for a while. His T-Phone buzzed once and Raph checked the message. The irritation lessened as he read Hope's text and he instantly responded.

 **[text] No, I'm up. What r we eating? R**

* * *

Once she'd read his message, she started to panic. What to eat?! Having never actually been out to dinner before, it started to dawn on her that she only ever ate nutribars. And that was only because she always ended up passing out when she didn't eat at all. She didn't even know any restaurants. What if she picked somewhere too fancy? Too bland? "This is why women don't ask guys out!" She mumbled to herself as she flipped open her laptop. "There must be something on here!" She stared typing into the search bar. All that came up was a bunch for crazy expensive restaurants that looked suspiciously romantic. Not what she had in mind.

After two hours of anxiety and furious sweating, Hope finally admitted defeat and texted him back.

 **[text] Anywhere you'd recommend?**

 _Play it cool, Hope. Just play it cool._

* * *

The T-Phone finally buzzed and Raph readily scooped it up. Mikey giggled from across the living room

"Who you texting, Raph? Your geeerlfriend?" he teased with a wide grin. Flushing furiously, Raph stood abruptly, armed with a throw pillow from the couch.

"None of your damn business!" he seethed as he chucked the pillow at his little brother's head. Mikey dodged the pillow easily and scampered towards his room, blowing a raspberry over his shoulder.

Raph frowned as he read Hope's text. _Well, at least she didn't say 'I don't care…'_ He thought for a moment, wondering what kind of place she'd like. Suddenly, it clicked. He had the perfect idea.

 **[text] U like pizza?**

* * *

 _Do I like pizza?_ Thought Hope after she'd read this one line for, what felt like, the hundredth time. _Everyone likes pizza. Surely?_ She couldn't even remember the last time she'd had it. It had been years, definitely.

 **[text] Pizza it is. I'm still paying. But you can pick me up. You know the address.**

Her hands shook as she pressed send. Was she being too formal? Would she put him off? Why was she so nervous? What would she wear?! She buried her face into her papers and sighed heavily.

* * *

 **[text] Great. See you at 7?**

Raph stood up and strolled toward the garage. If he was going to take this girl out for pizza, he'd take her out in style. He just hoped that it was tuned up and that he had an extra helmet.

* * *

 **[text] Sure thing. See you then.**

As calm and collected as Hope's replies had been, she was freaking out.

She decided to relax herself with her research until the time came for him to pick her up. Curiosity washed over her as she wondered what she'd be picked up in.

* * *

Raph pulled up in front of Hope's laboratory at seven that evening and killed the motor. Engaging the kickstand, he swung his leg off the motorcycle, he unfastened his helmet and laid it carefully on the seat. He strode up to the lab door and knocked confidently. He heard a muffled call from inside, so he waited impatiently, tapping his boot on the ground. This place wasn't really the 'Four Seasons', but it could fill up pretty quickly on a Saturday.

She didn't exactly have any clothes for such an occasion. Feeling like she wanted to impress him, she'd thrown together an ensemble, however, just before he'd arrived she'd had a look in the mirror and realized just how uncomfortable she appeared. It wasn't her. She pulled on her overalls, clasping them up and tied up her trainers. If he didn't like her the way she was, then he wasn't worth it, she'd agreed in her mind. As she heard his knock at the door, she called out to let him know she was on her way. Grabbing her yellow hooded jumper and zipping it up, she yanked the warehouse door open and saw him standing there, next to, what appeared to be a motorbike.

"Oh wow."

She looked great, even dressed in a faded pair of overalls and her yellow jacket. It was comfortable, and that was a good look for her. He smiled at her appraisal of his bike.

"Yep. She's not brand new, but she drives like a dream." He picked up two helmets from the leather seat and held one out to her. "You ready?"

"I've uh, never... been on one..." She stuttered, gawking at the motorbike. "What if I fall off?!" She exclaimed out loud. Ugh, she sounded like a right idiot.

"You won't," Raph assured her. "All you have to do is hold on to me. I'll do the rest. It's safe, trust me."

There was that word. 'Trust'. Something she couldn't seem to do with anyone. But there was something about his green eyes that made her believe him.

"Okay. Let's go!" She hopped on to the bike, nervously.

Climbing onto the bike, he secured his helmet on his head and waited until she had on hers. "Hold on tight," he instructed as he cranked up the motorcycle's noisy engine.

"Ohhhh my god….!" She yelped as he sped off. It was quite the rush. Adrenaline starting pulsing through her body, her heart banging wildly in her chest. She clung onto his intricate shell, though she didn't have time or the attention span at this moment to actually marvel at it. "This…is… amazing!" She yelled despite herself, throwing her head back and letting her long blonde hair flap in the wind.

Raph smiled at her joyous exclamation. He knew she'd get over her fear once she experienced the thrill of riding a motorcycle through New York City. Her grip on his shell didn't hurt, but he was very aware of where her hands were as they zipped around slower cars. He was disappointed that Fabio's was only twenty blocks from her lab as he pulled into the parking lot of the pizzeria. This place was a little more high-end than Antonio's, but they sure could make one hell of a pie.

They reached their destination and Hope still hadn't loosened her grip on his shell. She wasn't over the euphoric feelings she got from going that fast. It was then she started to really look at his hard shell. Beautiful patterns flowed around it and she couldn't stop herself from tracing the lines with her fingers. Catching herself, she stopped. "Uh… Sorry…" She mumbled.

"It's fine. I barely noticed," he lied as he slid off the bike. In actuality, he felt every stroke of her fingers when she traced the designs on his shell. The contact had been electric and delicate and he couldn't stop thinking about it as he removed his helmet. "What kind of pizza do you like?" he asked quickly, trying to push the memory out of his head.

What a question. Such a normal question. What kind of pizza does she like? A question anyone could answer without a thought. Hope started to internally panic.

"Um… The normal kind?" She finally managed to choke out. Were there that many types of pizza? A wave of anxiety passed through her. How was she to choose?

"Well, Fabio's is great! They make about any kind of pizza that you could want." He led her to the door and opened it for her, gesturing for her to enter ahead of him.

"Uh, thanks." She smiled awkwardly. He was such a gentleman; she was not used to being treated so nicely.

They took their seats, and Hope studied the menu. He was correct, there was pretty much every pizza topping she could imagine. It was overwhelming.

In the end, she decided to be honest with him. After all he had been so understanding of everything else. Why wouldn't he be of this too?

"Listen, Raphael, I've been… surviving on nutritional bars and vitamin supplements for the last two years. I, uh, I don't even remember what half of this stuff tastes like…" She waved her hand over the menu. "I mean, I don't even know where to begin, man." She gave him a lopsided smile and pleading eyes.

She hadn't told him at the time, but the chili cheese fries that she'd eaten on their first meeting, was the first proper food she'd eaten in a long time.

His eyes widened in surprise. Seriously? How is she still standing? She looked good though, for surviving on barely nothing. Raph quickly focused on the topping choices more closely than he did before.

"Well, let's keep it simple." He waved one of the servers over and ordered a large pizza, half cheese and half 'meat-lovers'. "Why've you been eating crap like that for so long? Can't ya cook?" Raph asked as the server left with their order.

She chuckled at his caring tone. "No time. As soon as I wake up, right up until I go to sleep, I'm working. I only eat that stuff to stop myself from passing out. I'd be useless then." She watched his furrowed brow and took in his features. She could tell he'd been through a lot, not just for the

"That sucks," he sympathized, barely refraining from chewing her out for not taking care of herself better. He was surprised that she hadn't made herself sick from all that… or maybe she had and just hid it well. He chewed his lip awkwardly, trying to think of something to say. _Come on, Raph, she's a girl, not the parole board. Say something, idiot!_

"How's your research coming?" was all he could manage.

She lit up. This was an easy subject. "Oh, so much better now that I've got your sample! I can finally do actual tests to see how the helixes change through my manipulation." She sighed happily, staring into space.

Raph could help smiling in kind with the excited light that brightened up all of her features. "Glad I could help." He could really use a drink, but since he was driving later, he'd stick to soda. Calling over another server, he asked for a Cola before turning to Hope. "Want anything?"

"Just water, please." She replied with a polite smile. Her heart started racing as she realized that once the waiter had gone, they'd be met with an awkward silence. She had to think of something to ask him. "Did, uh, anything exciting happen… at your work, I mean… this week?" Hope forced her words out, and she knew they sounded unnatural.

"Not really," he said, relaxing a little more in his chair, "Just making sure a bunch of drunk assholes keep their hands to themselves. Not all of them need me, though. Vixen once punched a guy so hard, he lost three teeth, and Maxi cage fights on her off days." He thanked the waiter who brought them their drinks before continuing. "It's not really what I wanted to do, but most places wouldn't give me a chance at a job with them."

Hope felt a strange feeling surge through her. It wasn't one she'd ever experienced before. Those were a lot of female names. What sort of place did he work? And with girls who could hold their own? Not like her. She couldn't even fight off three idiots with eggs.

She took a deep breath and hoped he hadn't seen the slight change in her expression.

"And… what exactly would you like to be doing?" She asked him quickly, running her finger down the condensation on the glass.

Raph wondered at the weird look that had crossed her face for a second when he was talking about Vixen and Maxi. What was that about? He chose to let it go. Probably just his imagination anyway.

"It's stupid… but I've always liked to draw. When the mutant's citizenship laws were passed, I wanted to get into the graphic design program at a community college. I actually started saving up for it too. But… stuff came up. "A heavy cloud of anger and regret settled on him. He glowered at the fizzing glass in his hand, furious with himself all over again.

 _I should ask about the 'stuff'._ _Should I ask about the_ _'_ _stuff_ _'_ _?_ _He brought it up._ _I won_ _'_ _t ask about the_ _'_ _stuff_ _'_ _._ _Should I?_ _No._ _I_ _'_ _m asking about the_ _'_ _stuff_ _'_ _._

"What… stuff…?"

Raphael had no idea of the internal struggle Hope had every time she tried to speak. It came from years of being on her own, with no other interaction. She often spoke to herself, but out of common courtesy, she opted to keep her personal vacillation to herself.

Raph considered lying. Just to keep her from giving him that look that most people gave him. He didn't want her to be afraid of him, or to think that he was a monster. He'd had a lifetime of that, and that was more than enough. But the more that he looked into her big blue eyes, the more convinced he became that she would instantly know and it would make things worse. She would find out anyway, so it was better that it came from him.

"I… I did some time at Riker's a few years back. Now that I've got a record… I can't get a good job and I can't get into any schools. The only reason I got a job at that club is because a friend went to bat for me." He waited to see how long it would take for her to throw her drink in his face and storm out.

Hope kept looking at him, completely immersed in his voice. She expected him to continue, but he seemed to have stopped, awaiting her reaction.

"What did you do?" She asked and instantly regretted it. Clamping her hand over her mouth she started shaking her head. "Oh… God… I'm sorry, this is what happens… if I don't think… before I talk… man, I'm sorry. That was so personal." She then knocked over her glass of water into her lap in distress. "Oh shit!"

"Here." He handed her his napkin and watched helplessly as she mopped up the water from her lap. The customers who had turned their heads at her sudden exclamation returned to their own conversations, leaving them in peace. A waiter returned with another water for Hope and more napkins.

"No, it's okay. I'm used to it," Raph said as soon as the waiter was out of earshot. "I beat up a guy, a human. Nearly killed him before the cops pulled me off. I just… I couldn't stop…" His voice faltered to a whisper before vanishing completely. He tried to say more, to explain away his actions, but words failed him.

Dabbing furiously at the wet patch, Hope looked back up at him. He wasn't a bad person. If he was, he wouldn't have saved her. Wouldn't have helped her with her research. Certainly wouldn't be taking her out to dinner. No. There was definitely something about him that made her want to know more.

He wouldn't have beaten someone near to death without good reason.

"Well, the human must have done something pretty bad to make you go that far." She concluded out loud, flicking a few damp napkins on the table.

"He went after my brother," Raph said dully, staring at the tabletop. He could see everything behind his mind's eye like it were a home movie.

"The guy went to school with Donnie and he didn't like that a mutant was at the top of his class. Insulted his intelligence or something. He and his cronies cornered him one day and put a gun to his head, saying that he should drop out of the program if he wanted to stay alive." He took a large gulp of his soda, not even tasting it.

"Donnie didn't want to make any trouble, but… I wanted to teach that punk-ass kid a lesson. So I went to his house. I knew who he was; wasn't hard to find out the rest. I was just gonna warn him offa messin' with Donnie. Just get him to leave him alone. The punk actually tried to hit me. Then… I lost my temper…" He lifted his eyes, trying to read her expression. "Like I said before, my temper's gotten me in a lot of trouble.

Hope's mouth was hanging open. It wasn't because of what he'd said. No. It was because she'd done almost the same thing with her own brother. And she understood. Completely.

"I dunno, man. I-I think if the ones we… love… are threatened… in any way, then, you know… things change." She shrugged. "It would be nice to have someone that cares that much about me… I mean you… I mean in general… Yeah." She stared with wild eyes at her now empty glass, which she was gripping tightly. "I don't blame you." This came out as a hoarse whisper and she chanced a look at him.

He caught her gaze, and for a long moment, neither of them said a word. The silence was broken by the server appearing with their pizza, steaming and piled high with pepperoni, sausage, and ham on one side, while the other was simply covered with bubbling cheese. The aroma was intoxicating and Raph could feel his mouth watering. Grabbing a slice from the meat-lover's half, he took an enormous bite. "Well, take a slice!" he insisted from around the food.

She did as instructed and gently blew on the molten cheese. Taking a tiny bite of the corner she chewed, swallowed and stared at the slice in her hand. How has she gone so long without tasting this… this… heavenly morsel?!

Greedily taking a larger bite, she ripped at the triangle until she was left licking her fingers. "Oh my god! It's… It's… Amazing!" She exclaimed, instantly grabbing another slice and wolfing it down, hardly stopping for air.

Raph laughed loudly, earning him the curious stares from the people around him. "Beats the hell out of nurtibars, huh?" he said as he finished the remainder of his pizza and reached for another slice.

She nodded enthusiastically, polishing off the second slice. But that much rich food, after so many years of not eating properly soon took its toll on her stomach. She felt her insides lurch, as her stomach rejected the pizza.

"Oh no…" She mumbled urgently and quickly excused herself. She made a swift dash to the ladies, where she made it just in time to hurl the cheesy goodness back up into the toilet bowl. She groaned and held back her hair.

As soon as she bolted for the bathroom, Raph was on his feet and followed her as far as the swinging door. Awful retching noises emitted from within and he grimaced slightly. This had been his idea, and so far, it had been a colossal failure. Sighing, he pushed the door open a crack.

"Hey… you alright in there?" he called tentatively.

Head down the toilet, feeling completely and utterly embarrassed, Hope called out softly. "Yeah…"

Now that what little food there was had come up, she felt slightly better. She flushed and quickly washed her hands, splashing her face with cold water in the process. She ran her fingers through her hair and sighed.

If there was even a minute chance that this guy could ever like a nerd like her, then it had most certainly been fully crushed. Face bright red, she pulled open the door to face the humiliation.

She was pale, except for a flush of color on each cheek, her skin was clammy, and her eyes were wet, but Raph didn't care. All that mattered was that she was okay.

"Come on, let's get out of here," he offered putting his arm around her comfortingly, "I already paid the bill, so don't worry about it."

He wasn't running a mile. Why wasn't he running a mile? It made no sense to her, whatsoever.

This guy, who could have the pick of strong girls who could fight, was leading this weak, helpless scientist, who couldn't even eat two slices of pizza, his arm around her, making her safe.

"This… has been a disaster." She mumbled miserably.

"Yeah," he agreed as they passed out of the restaurant, "but the night's still young. Think I know a place you might like." Considering the motorcycle in the parking lot, he made a decision. "Let's walk over there. I can come back for the bike later."

"Raphael? Can I ask you something? You don't need to answer, I'm just curious." She asked suddenly as they walked down the street in silence.

"Sure," he said, wondering what she had on her mind.

She inhaled deeply, half wishing she hadn't said anything. But it was now or never. "I just… don't get… uh… why you're still… hanging out with me…?" She stared dumbly at the ground. What a stupid question. Was she trying to push him away? She shook her head and bit her lower lip, slowly looking up at him, her eyes filled with doubt.

Raph stared at her for a second. Did she really think she didn't deserve to hang out with _him_? That was a new one… He cleared his throat awkwardly, not sure of what he should say.

"I… Well, I think you're an awesome person, Hope. You don't care about what I look like or what I might have done. You could have told me to get lost when I asked you if you wanted a beer… but you didn't." He stopped in the middle of the sidewalk and impulsively took her small, white hands in his large, deformed ones. "I'm hanging out with you because you don't look at me like I'm just some mutant ex-con… You look at me like I'm Raph, and outside of my family, that doesn't happen."

Her hands twitched in his. She didn't know where to look. What to say. Blinking a couple of times and swallowing hard, she gave him a toothy grin.

"Okay… Well… I just needed to get that… out… I… sure… hmm… 'Raph'… I like it. I may start using that." She looked down at their hands again. "Where are we going, anyway?" She looked over her shoulder, still unaware of their final destination.

Realizing that he was still holding her hands, he dropped them like they were on fire. He cleared his throat, mentally kicking himself for such a bold, impulsive move. Geez, he was starting to act like Donnie…

"Nope. I'm keepin' this one a secret 'til we get there." He started walking up the sidewalk again, his palms warm with the memory of her touch.

Taking a few bigger steps, Hope caught up to him. He was so mysterious. It irked her a little. She always knew everything, all the time. Surprises, not something she was fond of. But she brushed her uncomfortable feeling aside, willing herself to trust him.

Trust.

Why did that word keep popping up?

"You're the leader!" She laughed, saluting him.

"Better not let Leo hear you say that," Raph said with a sidelong smirk. "Last time I tried to be a leader, I nearly got my brothers killed. Leo's never let me live that down."

"I feel like there are a lot of stories for you to tell me." Hope stated, growing more curious by the minute.

"You have no idea…" he said vaguely, stopping at a sidewalk and waiting for the light to change. If he remembered right, it should only be a few blocks from here. "But I've been talking about me all night. Tell me something about you. Something I don't know." He had wanted to ask about her brother, but decided against it. She'd experienced enough angst tonight.

"Whoo, that's tough." She chewed her lip. "I graduated high school two years early. They got so fed up with me… answering all the questions before anyone else. Plus… I was bored. I needed a challenge." If she was honest, she really didn't like talking about herself. She wasn't interesting. She didn't have exciting anecdotes to tell.

"Sounds a lot like Donnie. He'd always get done with his schoolwork way before the rest of us, then he'd get to go play with his robots or something like that." He heard the rumblings of a crowd in the distance and saw the first neon lights. "There it is." He turned toward Hope with a wink. "Ever been to a street fair?"

"Ohhh that's a lot of people." She commented, her eyes wide. "I don't think I've ever seen that many people." Her reaction was answer enough to his question. She slipped her arm in his and clung tightly to him, trying to take in the hustle and bustle as they edged closer.

"Don't worry, they're pretty harmless, but, you might want to keep your wallet close. Just to be safe." They passed a lot of vendors and people selling t-shirts and other merchandise. There were a lot more humans around than mutants, though the mutants seemed to be keeping to themselves. The stalls run by mutants were fairly bare, which made Raph's eye twitch with irritation.

"This is amazing, Raph. Thank you for taking me." She beamed, still holding his arm. "I still owe you! Pick something, my treat."

He looked into a stall selling an assortment of pendants and imitation Japanese artifacts. He wanted to do as she asked and pick something nice, but nothing too expensive. As he studied an intricately carved marble pendant, he heard a voice behind him, cold and sneering.

"Look guys, one of the freaks has a girlfriend."

Hope was only a few feet away from Raph when she heard the voices. Dread started building up in the pit of her stomach. It was surreal; she'd been on the other side of one of these verbal attacks before, when her father would randomly pick a fight with a mutant on the street, but never had she been in this position.

Her eyes darted back and forth from Raphael to the three humans. _Always three, why did these type of bullies always travel in threes?_

She had no idea how Raph would react. She hoped he'd be the bigger man and ignore them, walk away. However she saw his eyes glaze over in irritation.

Walking silently over to him, she placed her small hand on his plastron, indicating that he should avoid a scene.

"They're not worth ground they're standing on." She stated firmly, looking up at him with pleading eyes.

"What's the matter, baby? Can't find yourself a real man, so you settle with a giant lizard? You gotta raise your standards." The blonde one in the center taunted flippantly. His two buddies behind him guffawed loudly and congratulated their friend on his wit. Raph's fingers curled into tight fists and a low growl formed in his throat. It was one thing to insult him. He could handle that. But they were jeering at Hope, and that was where he drew the line.

She felt his body tighten and remembered what he said about these sort of guys being all talk. This time she wasn't so sure. She quickly analyzed the men from head to toe. Not particularly big, not especially good looking either. Her conclusion was that these guys picked on mutants like Raph because they felt intimidated by his vigor and insulted them to stroke their own ego. Her solution: Take them down a notch.

She stepped in front of Raph, pushing her whole weight against him.

"A real man? That is classic, coming from you. What happened? Did you wish for a big dick and become one instead?"

The man's eyes bulged comically and his face turned a deep shade of purple.

"You smug little bitch!" he snarled as he stepped toward her menacingly. Instantly, Raph pushed her behind him and glared up into the man's face.

"You got somethin' to say? Say it to me. Leave her out of it."

They were the perfect combination of brains and brawn. Hope's little phallic dig had made a chink in the man's windshield. Now with Raph standing there looking dauntingly fierce, she was sure they were seconds away from the whole thing shattering.

The man's small brown eyes never left Raph's narrow green ones for a second. "Yeah… I got something to say." he said contemptuously, "You don't belong out here with normal people. Go crawl back under whatever rock you came from, freak." He spat a wad of mucous filled spit straight into Raph's face. The turtle recoiled in disgust and the man punched him hard across the jaw, causing him to stumble to the side a step.

 _So much for calculated tactics_ , thought Hope, frozen to the spot. Everything seemed to be going in slow motion. Several onlookers had stopped what they were doing to watch the scene unfold.

Hope was rapidly thinking of logical ways out of this situation, but it was futile. The only conclusion to this was that her new friend was going to get into a fight. And she was powerless to stop it.

Raph was livid. He could barely control the trembling in his limbs as he wiped at the saliva running down his face. Rising up to return the bastard's punch to the face, he stopped short when he saw the barrel of a snub nosed pistol in his face.

It wasn't the first time Hope had seen a gun. And it wasn't the first time she'd seen one pointed at someone's face. But it sure as hell didn't make the experience any less terrifying. She was gripping Raph's arm so tight that, if he'd been human, she most definitely would have pierced his skin with her finger nails.

Holding her breath, afraid to let out any air in case the armed guy would let off a stray shot, she stood rooted to the spot. Her mind was completely numb and it now felt like time had stopped altogether.

She wanted to save him. She wanted to show him that she wasn't weak.

But one wrong move and Raphael would be dead.

The small amount of people who had been watching the bust up had now recoiled back into a wide circle around them.

Everything felt like it was moving in slow motion. Raph was very conscious of Hope's fingers digging into his arm, of the crowd surrounding them, of the man's gun mere inches from his face. If it were just him, he would kick this guy's ass from here to Tuesday. But he needed to think of Hope and the other people at the fair. He couldn't afford for them to get hurt because of him.

"I should just kill you right here," the man muttered resentfully, gripping the pistol tighter. "One less mutant to stink up my town."

The only possible way out of this situation was to talk. Hope had played out every possible scenario in her head, and this was the only one where someone didn't get hurt.

She carefully concocted a suitable speech in her mind and let go of Raph. She stepped forward and looked the man dead in the eye.

"Yeah, good idea, man." Inside she was shaking like a leaf, but she spoke confidently. "You must be crazy excited about spending the rest of your life in jail. Plenty of witnesses too. You just wanna think about what you're actually doing, right now? Because if you pull that trigger, you're not just ending his life, you're ending yours too." She pursed her lips and gave him the most serious stare that she could muster.

Raph watched the man's face change as he processed what Hope had said. He was impressed; she was actually talking the guy down. The man seemed to come to a decision and he lowered his gun.

"Freak's not worth the lead…" he muttered as he tucked his weapon back into his waistband. "I don't wanna see your face around here again," he said, jabbing his finger at his plastron. Raph kept his mouth shut, but it was excruciatingly hard. "Let's go," the guy said to his friends and they ambled through the crowd, the people parting to clear them a path.

Once the thugs were out of range, Hope collapsed to her knees. She had used every single ounce of energy to stand up to them, and now, she thought she might pass out.

Raph knelt down next to her, concerned that she was going to fall over right there in the street. "You okay?"

She nodded quickly. "Yeah… I'm fine. Are _you_?!" She asked and stared up at him, holding out her hand for a help up.

"Sure, yeah… Fine," he said, raising to his feet and pulling her up with him. "That… That was pretty badass."

He was talking about her, right? He wasn't getting a thrill from having a gun pointed in his face. Surely not.

Feeling a little dazed as he helped her stand she opened her mouth. "It was just simple scenario logic. Once I eliminated all the ones where someone got hurt, that was the most apt route." It wasn't badass, it was math, she thought to herself. But she took the compliment nonetheless.

Checking him over for any sign of damage, she reached his bicep where there were four deep grooves from her nails. "Oh, man. Did I hurt you?" She asked, full of guilt, and traced her finger tips over his arm.

Raph looked down at the marks on his arm with mild surprise. He hadn't really even felt her nails digging into his skin. He had been so focused on the guy and his gun that everything else had been background noise.

"Nah, I'm fine. Really. It's nothing." Returning his gaze to her pale face, he smiled reassuringly. "But seriously, you saved my shell back there. And you didn't even have to raise a fist. That takes guts."

"Well, so did not clobbering that guy. I'm proud of you." She patted his shoulder and returned his smile. "We should probably get out of here though." She said as she looked around. There were still people in the crowd giving them sideways glances.

"Yeah. You're right…" What a mess this evening had turned out. It had been as close to disaster without someone getting hurt. Taking her arm protectively, he escorted her out of the fair. "Sorry for how awful it all turned out. Want me to take you home?" he asked, a little shamefaced.

"Well as first dates go, it could have been worse." She grinned, and then realizing what she said her eyes widened in horror. "I mean… not a… well… not really… Oh, man…" She trailed off, her face flushing crimson. "Yes. I should go home." She finished, not daring to look him in the eye.

"Okay," Raph said as they walked up the sidewalk back toward where they had left the motorcycle. She'd looked very uncomfortable after saying they were on a 'date'. Must have been a slip of the tongue. He decided not to read into much into it. If he expected too much, he'd just end up disappointed later.

As they both got on the motorcycle, Hope had a thought. "Hey Raphael… Raph… Do you reckon we could… uh… go on a proper ride with this one day…? Rather than just a few blocks…?" She wanted the amazing rush from speeding along the streets again, but not just to get from A to B. She grabbed onto his shell and leaned her cheek against it, waiting for his answer.

"Sure," he replied, securing his helmet and handing hers back over his shoulder. When she sat up to put on her helmet, he missed the warm pressure on his shell. "Just say the word and we'll drive anywhere you want to go."

"But not right now. I think I need a long sleep after that fiasco back there. Are you free… tomorrow?" She asked as they started freely moving around the streets. It was still a wonderful feeling, but it was dulled down by the horrifying experience they'd just had.

"I'm sure I can bum my shift off on someone. One of the guys owes me a favor," Raph shouted over the roar of the engine. The suggestion of a drive was a great idea. No speciesist jerks to mess with, no heavy, fatty food to weigh them down. Just the two of them and the open highway.

"Great. I can't wait!" She yelled, the wind in her hair. They reached her laboratory and she dismounted to bike, handing over the helmet. "It's been… interesting." She smirked at him, showing him that even though the night was a disaster that she still enjoyed spending time with him. "Call me tomorrow, we can arrange a time."

"Yeah… I'll call ya. 'Night," he said lamely as she gave him a little wave and walked toward the door to her lab. As soon as she slid it closed behind her, Raph threw down his helmet with an irritated sigh.

 _Way to go Raph… You sure know how to show a girl a good time._ At least he'd have another shot at it tomorrow night. He'd better get Pres on the phone to take his shift for him. Raph kicked the bike into life and sped off into the night, back toward the lair.

Hope leaned against the door and heard the motorcycle speed off. Her mind was buzzing with all the things that had happened that evening. He would call her, wouldn't he? She rubbed her head where there was still a slight bruise from the attack the previous week. Walking over to her bed, she slumped into it and fell into a deep sleep.


	4. Chapter 4

"Going out again tonight?"

Raph started in surprise and smacked his head on the muffler of his bike at the sound of his brother's voice. Cursing loudly, he sat up and glowered at Leo, who leaned nonchalantly against the door jamb that led into the garage.

"Don't you have anything better to do than standing there gawking at me?" He complained as he gathered himself to his feet. Leo shrugged.

"Not really. Classes don't start until four." He turned to leave but paused momentarily. "Tell her we said 'hi'," he said with a cheeky grin and left before Raph could form a decent retort.

Growling, he turned back to his work and finished fine tuning the shocks. He hadn't called her yet to schedule a time. Didn't want to seem too eager to see her again, but really, he couldn't wait to show her just what the bike could do.

Glancing up at the clock over the door, he saw it was almost three o'clock in the afternoon. He'd better do it now, or she might be the one to cancel. Typing in the correct digits, he held the phone to his ear and listened to the shrill ringing while the call tried to connect.

* * *

Hope's phone buzzed on her desk. "Dammit!" She cursed as she the test tube she was holding slipped from her hand and smashed to the floor. Fortunately for her, it was empty. Scrambling to her desk and desperately searching for her phone under the mess, she threw screwed up bits of paper on the ground until she finally found it.

It was him. He was calling her. Butterflies suddenly started whirling in her stomach. Why was she so nervous about answering it? She'd only seen him the night before.

Earlier that day she'd been rummaging through her makeshift closest trying to find a suitable outfit for that evening. She didn't want to seem sloppy, wearing the same clothes two nights in a row. At the bottom of the cupboard she'd found an old rubbish bag filled with some clothes she'd been eventually planning to throw away. Raking through it, she spotted something she'd once worn as a Halloween costume to a party a number of years ago. A smile had spread across her lips figuring it would be perfect.

Pressing the phone to her ear she answered. "Hope Brevin."

Hope Brevin. It was the first time he had heard her surname, but it suited her somehow.

"Hey, it's Raph, still up for that bike ride tonight?"

"Of course!" She replied, a little too enthusiastically. "Ahem, yeah yeah, I am. You know where I live; what time is best for you?"

"I can be there at five," Raph said, checking the clock above the door. "Think you can be ready by then?"

Hope glanced at the ensemble she'd looked out, handing on the door frame. "Yup. I'll see you then."

"Great!" He responded with a little more enthusiasm than he thought was necessary. "See you then." He hung up and looked back at the bike. This had better go smoother than yesterday. He was sure that a girl could only put up with so much. Maybe he should check the transmission one more time… Just to be safe…

* * *

There wasn't time to start a new batch of serum. Hope looked longingly at her research. She found it hard to sit around and do nothing. She'd been meaning to tidy her desk for a while, so groaning with displeasure at such a task, she started sorting things out.

Once a reasonable amount of time had passed she changed into her clean set of clothes and planted herself in front of the mirror.

"Not bad, Brevin." She gave herself a smug smile and waited for Raph to arrive.

* * *

With a rev of the engine, Raph pulled up in front of Hope's laboratory for the second time in two days. Pulling out his T-Phone, he sent her a text, telling her that he was there. Then he sat back on the leather seat and waited for her to come out. He wondered vaguely if she would be wearing the yellow jacket again. It really brought out the pale yellow in her hair.

"Gah, snap out of it, Raph…" he chastised himself aloud. His thoughts were interrupted by the metallic sliding of the door opening. He looked up just in time to see Hope step out into the alley. "Wow," was all that he could think of to say.

Hope was pleased with his reaction. She was dressed head to toe in tight leather, a costume she'd donned as a rock biker chick once. The pants clung to her, showing off all her curves and the jacket was zipped up all the way to her neck, extenuating her figure. "I thought it might be appropriate." She held a steady smirk on her face.

"Uhh…," Raph tried to speak, but words failed him significantly. He wanted to say something, but his brain had stopped working. She looked stunning in all that black leather, clad in tall buckled boots and her long hair tied back in a messy bun. He couldn't take his eyes off of her. _Focus! Say something, idiot!_ "Yeah… that'll work. I mean…," he stammered, thinking he came across as chauvinistic. "You look great."

Hope's face flushed crimson. "Well… Thanks…" She held out her hand for the helmet. "Might as well complete the look, eh?" She grinned and winked at him. _Did you just wink? Seriously, Hope, get a grip of yourself,_ she scolded in her head.

He stared dumbly at her outstretched hand for a moment before his brain recognized what she was saying. With a start, he put the smaller of the two helmets in her hand before turning away to put the other over his own head.

 _What is wrong with you_? he scolded himself, _She's just a girl… Seriously, you've fought aliens, ninjas, and giant freaking cockroaches! Pull yourself together…_ His heart nearly stopped when she slid onto the bike behind him and slipped her arms around his plastron.

"Ready?" he managed to croak, the heat pouring into his face relentlessly.

"Ready!" She chirped excitedly, giving him a quick squeeze to show she was holding on.

Raph revved up the engine and peeled out of the alley. He skirted around cars easily, deftly leaning into every turn. He could hear Hope laughing excitedly as she clung to his shell. Score one for Raph today.

Focusing on the road ahead, he sped down the busy streets, heading toward the edge of the city. It was going to take a while to get to the place he wanted to show her, but he was certain it would be worth it.

"This is even better than last time!" She squealed from behind him. There was something exhilarating about being this out of control. It was an adrenaline rush to the max. And she was loving every second. Being on a motorcycle, the way she was dressed, with this incredible guy, she felt almost sexy.

Her enthusiasm was infectious and he let out a crow of triumph as he gunned the engine, speeding over the bridge and past the last of the welcome signs. Now there were fewer cars, increasingly open space, and the buildings became smaller and further apart.

Raph quickly checked the mileage signs that they passed, calculating how long it would take them to get to the park.

"We're going to have to stop for gas soon," he shouted over his shoulder to her. "There won't be a lot of stations out where we're going."

"And where is it exactly that we're going?" She shouted back. It had been a long time since she'd been out of the city. Years in fact.

He slowed the bike, turning into a nearby gas station and parking in front of one of the pumps. Shutting off the motor, he smirked at her from over his shoulder. "When was the last time you've seen the stars?"

The stars. He was taking her to watch the stars? "I-I… well… not recently… I mean… I have seen them… but not… well… heh." She rambled nervously, suddenly feeling very self-conscious of her attire. She wrapped her arms around herself protectively. _I must look like a complete idiot standing here looking like this, stuttering like a fool,_ she thought sadly.

He had expected her to be thrilled, but instead, she looked mortified. Did he do something wrong? He got off the bike and looked into her anxious face.

"We don't have to go there if you don't want to. I thought… well, that you'd like it. You know, since you're a scientist and all. I… I just…" He stopped and sighed, defeated. _Way to screw up another one, Raph,_ he thought to himself cynically.

"No! I do! I mean… I want to. Definitely!" She backtracked quickly. Why did he make her so nervous?! She gazed up into his emerald orbs and grinned awkwardly.

He wasn't sure what to make of all this. He would never understand women… but looking into her bright blue eyes really made him want to try.

"Okay," he said, trying to regain his composure. "As soon as I get the tank filled up, we can go. You can stretch your legs if you want. They might be a little stiff from sitting for so long."

"Good idea." She dismounted the bike and walked around a bit, taking in the evening air. It felt so much fresher out here than in the stuffy city.

Raph couldn't help but watch her as she ambled around the parking lot of the service station, outlined against the twilight. The way she moved was breath-taking, and it wasn't just because of the tight leather outfit. Glancing slightly to the right, he noticed that he wasn't the only one staring. A greasy teenager was leaning up against the side of the building, leering at Hope in a way that made Raph's skin crawl. If the creep went anywhere near her, he'd be in for a world of hurt.

She lifted her arms above her head to stretch out her back. Once her muscles felt a bit less tensed up she turned back to the bike to find the mutant turtle staring at her. She couldn't quite place the look on his face, it was a medley of confusion, anger and perhaps even a dash of awe. When their eyes met, his darted away in a split second to scowl at the leering teenager. She paid no attention to the boy. Her eyes were fixed on Raph. She walked slowly towards him with a smile on her face. "Almost ready?"

He instantly relaxed when she returned. "Yeah, I'm ready," he said, strapping on his helmet. "Maybe before nightfall, I can teach you to drive the bike yourself. What do you think?"

"Wow! Really?! That would be amazing!" She replied, feeling excited. Putting on her helmet and regaining her seat on the bike, she ran her fingers down his shell, believing he couldn't feel it. "It sounds a bit terrifying though. You sure you can trust me?"

He closed his eyes at the light touch of her fingertips on his shell. The contact felt really nice, and he barely stopped himself from moaning softly. "Hrm? Oh! Um… Yeah… I can do that. As long as you can trust me with teaching you how to drive. We'll take it slow, so there's nothing to worry about."

"Well as long are you're sure. Let's go! I'm curious about where it is you're taking me in order to see the stars…" Again she encircled her arms around his waist her hands resting on his plastron. The leather from her jacket squeaked on his shell.

Raph revved up the engine and pulled away from the pumps. He tried not to think about her hands pressing on his plastron too much. She needed to be holding on to him. Why was it so noticeable now? "It's a place I found back when the Kraang invaded!" He shouted to her over his shoulder. "My bros and I camped out there one night, and I swear I could see every star in the sky from there!"

Hope smiled inside her helmet. Maybe he would tell her more stories of his past. The times before mutants were free. It was something she had always been curious about. If there were so many mutants living in New York, where had they been before?

They drove for another hour and a half before he slowed and turned down a dirt road. Raph pulled off the road at an empty campsite, complete with picnic tables and the charred remains of a few campfires.

"I think we'll keep the bike here and walk to the clearing." He looked up at the descending sun and decided that they had enough time. "How about we get in a lesson before the sun sets?"

She chuckled. "Well just a quick one, I don't want to embarrass myself too much…" She turned away slightly and unzipped her jacket. "I am cooking in these things!" She explained before removing it and laying it on one of the picnic tables. Under it was a plain black strapped top, which was partially damp with sweat.

Raph quickly averted his eyes from her bare shoulders, glistening with sweat and the black top that clung to every curve. He was suddenly conscious of how different the two of them were. Not that she cared; she just wanted to learn how to drive his bike. But she was a beautiful, human girl and he was… well, he was a freak.

His own words from years before echoed loudly in his ears, chastising his brothers for having hope of love in their lives. _You don't have a chance with her! Stop kidding yourself!_ Now he understood why Donnie and Leo had always looked so hurt when he'd said that. Raph wanted to have that kind of hope of love and happiness, but… who would ever want to be stuck with a green, shell-backed monstrosity like him?

"Okay… So what do I do…?" Hope stared dumbly at the bike, unaware of what she should be doing.

The sound of her voice snapped Raph out of his abstraction. _Dammit! Stop being such an ass!_ He cleared his throat as he stepped up to the motorcycle.

"Well, the first thing is to actually get on the bike," he said, teasing her to cover up his own insecurity.

Hope looked uncomfortably at the bike. It was really very large, and even from being on the back, she knew her feet wouldn't touch the ground. She placed her hands on the handlebars and whipped her leg over. Sure enough, she didn't have the push to get herself up and over.

"Uh… help…" she looked to Raph awkwardly, giving him a sheepish smile.

He stepped behind her and grabbed her around the waist. She didn't weigh very much at all, so positioning her on the motorcycle was no problem.

"There ya go. Can you touch that pedal down there with your feet?"

The feeling of his large hands around her waist made her chest tighten and tingles shot up her whole body.

"S-sure…" She stammered, half longing for his touch again. Once comfortable in position, she placed her foot on the pedal he had indicated. "There. Woah."

Now she felt absolutely powerful. She was only sitting on it, but damn she felt hot. She ran her hands over the handles feeling the smooth metal on her palms.

"Okay," Raph said, coming up close beside her. "I'm just going to show you the controls for now. Let you get a feel for them before you go anywhere."

He pointed to the pedal he'd asked about before. "That's how you change gears." He applied pressure to her foot, demonstrating how to reach the different gears. "And the brake and throttle are on the handlebars. So, to stop, turn the left and to go, turn the right. Easy enough, right?"

Hope cocked an eyebrow at him. "Easy when you know how, you mean." she pursed her lips and looked down at her hands, still gripping the handlebars. "Okay, okay, I think I've got it." She recited what he's said in her head a couple of times, until it was fully wedged in there.

"Good. I'm gonna start the engine, but keep it in park so you can feel how the acceleration feels without speeding into a ditch." Raph turned the key and the engine roared into life. "After you get comfortable, I'll let you drive it a little, just slow. Think you got this?

From being on the back of the bike before, she had still felt a little of what the engine being on had done to her. But now that she was up against the engine and not moving, vibrations were sent all through her body, it was electric and her eyes widened, realizing that she was getting more excited than she probably should. "I-I got it…" she said, barely audible over the roar of the engine.

"Alright," Raph replied matter-of-factly. He pulled the bike up and disengaged the kickstand. "Take it out of park and put it in first. But go slow, okay? Just go to the end of the road there." He pointed to a place about an eighth of a mile further where the road joined another.

Hope was terrified. She didn't even have a driver's license. _You are a scientist. You do crazy things every day. Why are you so scared of this?_ She said confidently in her mind. Angling her foot slightly on the gear pedal she felt it change. She leant forward and the motorcycle coughed and went dead.

"Oh. Well, that's not what I expected…" She gritted her teeth and looked to Raph, biting her lower lip, trying hard not to laugh.

Raph bit back the laugh for as long as he was able, but soon it came full force. He leaned against the side of the bike and covered his face with one large hand, his body convulsing with wild laughter. After a minute he collected himself and wiped his eyes. "You must have flooded the engine. It's okay. Rookie mistake; happens all the time."

The sight of the turtle laughing like that, totally free, no stress, just pure happiness, made Hope's heart warm a little. She stared at him as he fell about with laughter, her jaw aching from the smile on her face. "You know, maybe I'm not cut out for this." She grinned as he wiped the positive tears from his eyes.

"Nah, it just takes practice. I fell off that damn thing a hundred times before I got the hang of it." He looked up and saw that the sun had disappeared behind the tree line and the sky was growing darker. "Think that'll do it for driving lessons today. Ready to go see more stars than you've ever seen in your life?" He held his hands out to her, ready to help her off the bike.

"Yes. I really am." She took his hand, swung her leg over the seat and jumped down. Realizing how close they were now standing and that she still had a hold of his hand, her heart started wildly thumping in her chest. She felt her face grow red and her breathing become labored.

"Come on, it's this way," he said, pulling her in the direction of the trees. Her small hand was cool and her skin felt soft and smooth against the rough callouses on his palm. He released her hand awkwardly and they strolled through the trees, accompanied by the sounds of the forest.

It was starting to feel colder and Hope slipped her jacket back on. "This is beautiful." She commented in awe, gazing up at the nature around her. "I don't get to see things like this often." She realized suddenly that she was completely relaxed and had stopped over thinking her words before speaking. This realization made her look up at Raphael. _What is he doing to me?_ She wondered.

"Before we left New York after the invasion, we'd never seen anything like this before," he said quietly as he pushed past some brush. The temperature was falling slowly and he began to wonder if that leather jacket was going to be warm enough for her. He suddenly wished that he had brought a coat, just so he could offer it to her. "There's a clearing up ahead where you can just lay back and see everything in the sky."

"I have to ask, and I'm sorry for being so… blunt." She piped up suddenly. "But before mutants became part of society, where did you live?" It was a question that had been playing on her mind for some time now, and she couldn't think of a good time to ask. So there is was, out in the open, ready for him to answer.

"When Master Splinter rescued us, he took us into the sewers and raised us down there." He smirked at the slightly disgusted look on her face. "Yeah, it was pretty gross, but if we'd chanced it on the surface, we coulda ended up in a research lab. We might not have made it out of that."

"That's very true. Sorry for being so forward, I just always wondered where the mutants had been hiding all that time. Before, you know, the mutagen spill." She slowed down slightly, letting him lead the way on the narrow path.

"Some mutants were a lot more subtle than others. The ones who worked for the Shredder walked around on the surface all they wanted, scaring the crap out of the humans." Raph hopped over a fallen tree, then turned to help Hope over.

"Wow, I'm surprised it wasn't in the news more. Maybe the government knew about the mutants long before we did. There are a lot of conspiracy theories about that, actually. The best one I ever-" she was cut short as she tripped over the log and fell fabulously at Raph's feet. Laying on her back, staring up at him, she covered her face with her hands, completely and utterly gobsmacked.

"Oh shit! You okay?" he asked, quickly kneeling down next to her. Something drew his eye to her right left. The trouser leg was torn and there was an angry red scrape along the skin. He touched it gingerly and she hissed in pain. "Dammit… don't want you walking on that…," he mumbled as he slid his arms under her legs and behind her back, lifting her easily.

"Ugh, I'll survive. Woah!" She said as he lifted her up. "So much for a non-eventful night." She smiled gratefully at him. The way he was carrying her meant that she needed to keep her arms wrapped around his neck, in order to keep herself steady. It also meant that she could casually lean her cheek against his rough skin without it seeming weird.

The smell of strawberries coming from her hair was intoxicating and Raph had a difficult time focusing on the path ahead of him. He needed to keep talking, just to keep his mind off of the touch of her cheek on his shoulder and the way her arms were wrapped around his neck. "You… were saying something about mutant conspiracy theories?"

"What? Oh right! Yeah. So, I don't know what it was like from your point of view, but to us humans, it was so weird. The media never really reported anything and we weren't warned. It was just one day, 'hey some mutated people are going to be wandering about, treat them nicely.' It was so badly done. But anyway. Because we still don't really know what happened, there are tons of theories about it. Mostly around the Kraang after the invasion. But there are some saying that the government knew about mutants all along, but when some finally started to show themselves they denied it. There's this great one though, that some of the mutants were fighting crime at night, like some sort of superheroes. I mean, it's like stuff from comic books. I dunno, man, I don't believe it, you'd think someone would have noticed if that were happening!" Once Hope got going, she found it hard to stop. She was interested in these types of things, and it was nice having someone who actually listened.

"Oh really?" Raph couldn't help but be amused at the story. "I think I've heard that one before. Those crime-fighters weren't ninjas, were they?"

Hope scoffed. "Ninjas, superheroes, vigilantes. Whatever you wanna call it." She laughed. "It's ludicrous really."

"I dunno… Maybe not as crazy as you might think…" Raph gave her a knowing smirk. He wondered if she would believe him if he told her. She was right though. It was a crazy concept. If he hadn't lived it, he wouldn't believe it.

She twisted her body slightly to look him in the eye, shooting him a suspicious look. "What was that look for…?" She asked quizzically. "Do you… know something…?"

Raph ducked under the last tree branch and emerged into the clearing. Above them, thousands of stars were sprayed across the midnight blue sky above the tops of the trees. He smiled at the look of amazement on her face as she looked around at the night sky.

"You said one time that I had a lot of stories to tell," he said as he set Hope down gently on the grass. "Well, I'm gonna tell you some of those stories. About four mutant turtles who were raised by a ninja master…"

She forced her eyes away from the beautiful flurry of stars in the sky and gawped at him. "You… What…?!" She managed to choke out.

"Don't talk, just… listen for a while. Okay?" He settled down on the grass next to her and began to talk. He told her about coming out of the sewers for the first time, about fighting the Kraang, the Shredder, and the Purple Dragons, told her about the times when they won battles, and times when they lost battles. He wanted her to know everything. He wanted her to know about him.

Over the course of the stories Hope listened intently. This is exactly what she had hoped for. And with every new anecdote that he stared, she couldn't believe her ears. This was real. This had all been happening over the last two decades, and she had been none the wiser. And what he was telling her. They had all been so brave, so courageous, and they had never asked for any recognition, no thanks. It was unbelievable.

"And then the mutant laws were passed. After that, it's not like we could just go out and fight crime like that anymore. The law applies to us now. So we hung up our ninja weapons and I haven't fought with my sais since. Just for exercise, but that's it."

He finally came to a stop and glanced at her, curious as to what she might say. It was a lot to take in and he hoped that he hadn't overwhelmed her.

She looked at him for a long time before she spoke. "Well… It's a very long and crazy story, Raph… If you made it up… you're a genius. If you didn't… then… you're a… a… ninja…? That's just… Oh my god." She shook her head in disbelief, and struggled to her feet.

"Suddenly wish I'd brought my sais so I could prove I'm not a liar." He stared up at the stars and breathed in the cool night air. "But it's all true. Swear on my shell."

"Wow." she whispered, following his gaze upwards. "It's a lot to take in. But one thing's for sure, you need to introduce me to your family. They sound wonderful." She wandered over to him and put an arm around him. "Thank you for taking me here. It's truly stunning."

Raph stiffened at her embrace, then snaked his arm around her and returned it. "Just wanted to see if it would compare," he murmured to himself. Speaking louder, he said, "Oh yeah! The guys have been bugging me about you for ages. They'll jump at the chance to meet ya."

She raised her eyebrow and dislodged herself from him. "You've… uh… you've told them about me…?" she asked, wondering what he could have said. She sat herself down on the grass and lay back, peering up at the sky's beautiful canvas.

"Mikey forced it out of me the night I took you out for that beer," he said begrudgingly, closing his eyes as he lay back on the grass next to her. "When you meet him, you'll understand how it's hard to keep secrets from him."

Raph sighed contentedly as he relaxed slowly in the grass. "He blabbed it to the others, and now they tease me about any chance they get." He yawned loudly and stretched out his arms.

"You've never had a girl… friend… No wait, that's not what I meant. Friend who's a female… Ugh, you know what I mean…" Hope stammered, covering her face with her hands in embarrassment.

Raph hesitated for a moment, wondering if he should really tell her. Throwing caution to the wind, he said "Before I went to prison… there was a girl, but she gave up on me when I was arraigned. Haven't seen her since." It still hurt to talk about Brooke, but he'd slowly been letting it go.

"Oh… how long… were you in for…?" She asked cautiously, not wanting to probe too far.

"Three years," he said solemnly, not opening his eyes. "I could have served ten, but I pled down. I didn't deny what I did, but I made damn sure that they knew why."

"Was she… human? Your girl?" Hope felt like she was asking too many questions, but he didn't seem to be wavering.

"Yeah. She was human. A teacher. Great with kids." Why was she asking so many questions about Brooke? She can't have known her. Probably didn't.

"I'm sorry that you lost her." She said mournfully chancing a look in his direction. _Wow Hope, way to ruin the mood,_ she thought to herself angrily.

"Yeah. I was too, but it was probably better that way. I… I wasn't the best kind of… guy for her. And I proved it by getting my ass arrested." He sighed and shook his head. "Guess it's just not something I was meant to have."

Hope decided to answer him by taking his hand in hers. It was a bold move and she knew he could very easily reject her gesture, but she needed him to know that she was there, and she cared.

His eyes flew open at the sudden pressure on his fingers. He turned his head to look into her eyes. They were full of compassion and a sweetness that was all for him. He couldn't understand why he would deserve to be looked at like that, but he wouldn't give it up for the world.

He squeezed her hand back, grateful that she was here and wishing that he could be more to her than what he was. Illuminated by only the light of the moon and stars, she was truly beautiful.

They lay like that, side by side, hands intertwined, gazing up at the sky, for what felt like hours. It was one of the most relaxed moments of Hope's life. She couldn't even remember the last time she felt this at peace.

Raph felt his eyes growing heavier the longer they lay there. She didn't seem to want to talk, and he'd talked too much for one night. He didn't want to interrupt the quiet, nor did he want to disturb the obvious contentment in his companion. As he dozed, he thought of Hope's fingertips, lightly tracing the patterns on his shell.

She heard Raph's breathing become steadier and realized that he'd fallen asleep. Smiling to herself, she let go of his hand and turned into him, leaning her head on his plastron. She was too exhausted to even think about heading back, plus, she was enjoying this tranquil moment. Her eyes eventually closed and she drifted into a deep sleep.


	5. Chapter 5

The bright sunlight woke Raph the next morning. He blinked against the light and made to rise, only to be hindered by a weight on his plastron. He looked down and was surprised to see Hope's head lying on his plastron, her body pressed against his.

For a moment, he didn't know what to do. Should he try to get up and let her sleep? Should he keep lying there? He didn't want to bother her, but they needed to get back to the city. They'd been out all night and he was sure she had to work. Gently, he put his hand on her shoulder and shook her.

"Hope? Time to get up."

She was dragged from a wonderful dream, which dissipated as soon as her eyes opened. It took her a couple of moments to discern where she was and who she was with. Her cheek was pressed up against a hard, rough surface, and when she delicately ran her hand across it, suddenly everything came back to her.

She sat bolt upright and blinked at Raph. "Sorry…" was all she could muster.

He smirked at her mussed hair and slightly dazed look in her eyes. Even so, she still looked good. "It's okay," he said, pushing himself up and grunting in discomfort. Sleeping on the hard ground had made his joints feel stiff.

"Sure could go for a cup of coffee right about now. How'd ya sleep?"

"Actually… better than I have in a long time." She admitted, smoothing down her hair and pulling it roughly into a bun. She looked down at her torn trousers; the cut from her fall wasn't looking too bad. However the trousers were definitely a write off.

"About time I got you home," he jested lightly as he pulled her to her feet. "Kept you out way too late." He stretched his arms over his head, his tight muscles loosening and he yawned loudly.

"Probably a good idea." She agreed, taking a short glance at him as he stretched. She wanted to run her fingers all over him, feel his rough skin, and trace over his plastron, seeing how he was all put together. She shook her head, snapping herself out of the fantasy. "What will your brothers say?" She smirked, wondering what conclusions they would jump to.

"Probably everything you think they'll say, but I can handle them." He looked down at her leg. "You going to be okay to walk back or you want a lift?"

Hope smiled at him gratefully. "Thanks, but I'll be alright. It doesn't hurt too much anymore." They started to walk out of the clearing, Hope limping very slightly. "I know I said it last night, but thank you. This was absolutely amazing. And I'm… glad you told me about yourself."

"You're welcome," he said sincerely. "Thought I'd left you in suspense long enough about the kind of company you keep." His eyes lit up as an idea popped into his head. "If you wanna meet the guys, you could come watch us practice. We still do some ninja training at Leo's dojo, but that's only if you want to."

Nerves started to build up in the pit of her stomach. She really did want to meet his brothers, but what if they didn't take to her? Raph was literally the only mutant that had ever given her the time of day. What were the chances that three others would also?

She looked up into his eyes. He needed an answer. She'd paused for too long now.

"Yes. I'd like that very much." She answered, still feeling that wave of dread wash through her.

"Great!" he said, skirting around a thatch of saplings, "If you thought the stories were good, you need to see us in action. We've kicked some serious ass, even on our off days." He couldn't keep himself from smiling. This had gone better than he'd expected.

She had to suppress a laugh. He looked like an excited puppy. Grinning to herself as they made their way through the forest, she felt as though her life might have just reached a turning point.

"When… uh… When do you train…?" She asked apprehensively once they reached the parking spot.

"Usually in the morning," he replied as he climbed onto the bike, "After my shift gets done and before Donnie's class starts. When she climbed on after him, Raph handed her the helmet she'd been using.

Placing the helmet over her head, she stopped short. "You didn't… have a shift last night, did you?" She started to panic that he'd missed work because of her and guilt started to rise in her throat.

"Nah, I bummed my shift off on a guy who owed me a favor." He started the ignition and revved up the engine. "Hold on tight. We've got a lot of ground to cover and not a lot of time to do it."

Gripping him tightly around the midriff, she prepared herself for the long journey. After such an amazing night, she looked forward to the thrill of the ride.

The drive back to the city was made in record time. Raph wanted to make sure that she got home safely and in time to get some work done. She'd stayed out all night and slept on the forest floor because of him. The least he could do was get her home as quickly as possible. Finally, he rumbled up in front of her door and killed the engine.

"Here we are. I… I hope you had fun _." You sound like such a dork…_ He would be seriously surprised if she didn't laugh at him.

"I did. I really did. I've never seen something so… wonderful. Thank you." She paused and bit her lower lip. Getting closer to him, she stood up on her tip toes and pulled her arms around his neck. "Thank you. Truly." She whispered and while coming back down she gave him a brisk peck on the cheek. She smiled to herself and headed back into her lab. It was going to be a strange day. She knew she'd never get him off her mind.

Raph stared dumbly at the closed door for a long time before his brain started again. That was when he climbed on his bike and sped back toward the lair.

He couldn't believe she'd kissed him. It was only a little peck on the cheek, but the sensation had been electric and every synapse in his brain was on fire.

* * *

"Raphie! Where've you been?" Mikey asked when he stepped through the door.

"Out," he said shortly as he stomped up the stairs. From below, Leo's voice arrested his attention.

"You were with _her_ , weren't you?"

Raph paused at the top of the stairs, knowing that there was no use in denying it. Mikey and Donnie gaped at him, but Leo smiled knowingly.

"At least tell me you kissed her," he said as he leaned against the wall, sipping his cup of tea. Raph didn't say anything, just stepped inside of his room and slammed the door behind him.

* * *

Raph pushed the iron bar up off his plastron with a grunt. Sweat beaded on his brow as he pumped the weights to the beat of a heavy metal group playing on his MP3 player. As much as he tried, he couldn't get her out of his head. He thought that working out would do the trick, but it only made the image of her stronger in his mind.

He looked slightly to his right and started when he saw Leo standing over him. The bar slipped in his grip and he nearly dropped in onto his plastron. Grunting, he pushed the bar up on its holster and sat up.

"What do you want?" He muttered ungraciously, ripping the buds out of his ears. Leo smiled gently.

"You said something about inviting your…. _friend_ to the dojo to watch us practice?"

"Yeah," he said suspiciously, thinking over the way his brother had said the word 'friend'.

"Well, I wanted to tell you I worked it so we have the dojo free this afternoon. If you wanted to invite her to come watch."

"Oh… Thanks, man. She'll like that." Raph mopped his face with a towel and tossed it to Leo, who caught it with one hand.

"Oh, and tell her that if she wants to stay for dinner, she's welcome." Taking the sweaty towel, Leo left his brother alone in the weight room. Raph promptly picked up his phone and dialed Hope's number.

* * *

For the rest of the day Hope tried her hardest to get on with her research. But every time there was a lull in the work, he popped into her head. Her mind was racing with all the wonderful things that had happened, however her brain began to over analyze the events. She started to become unsettled, convincing herself that he would never like her in that way.

Forcing herself back to work, Hope happened upon a crumpled piece of paper adorned with her scribblings.

"That's it!" She shrieked, flattening out the paper. In her excitement she brushed past a test tube and it smashed into the ground, spilling its contents across the floor. "Oh… no…" She sighed. It was the last vial of Raphael's blood.

Hope swept up the last remaining shards of glass and dropped them into the bin. She needed that last sample of blood to prove if her theory could work. Without it, it was just that. A theory. And she was so close.

She didn't want to call Raph so soon after their time together. But then again, her work would come to a standstill otherwise.

 _What if he thinks you're just using him?_ A taunting voice whispered in her head. That was ridiculous. He must know by now how she felt.

She sat heavily on her desk chair and vacillated between calling him and leaving it alone. Glaring at her phone, her fingers twitched and she exhaled with annoyance, knowing what her decision had to be.

That's when her phone rang in her hands. "Uh, hi, I was literally just about to call you. What's up?" She answered.

She sounded tense on the line and Raph frowned. "Hey. My bros were planning a training session for this afternoon and wanted to know if you wanted to watch."

"Wow, really? That sounds awesome. I'd love to." She replied, unable to keep the smile off her face. She could hear a small amount of gall in his voice, which worried her slightly. He wouldn't be calling if he didn't want her to come, so why was she anxious? "Actually, there was something I needed to speak with you about anyway."

"Sure, what's up?" Raph said as he twisted the cap off a bottle of Gatorade. He could feel his gut twisting with nerves. What could she want to talk about? Did she want to apologize for the kiss? To tell him it was a mistake?

Hope faltered, bringing the phone away from her ear. If she outright asked him now for another blood sample, he might get annoyed at her; he could just hang up and that would be the end of it. No, she needed to see him, so she could explain the situation.

"I think it would be better if I spoke to you in person," she choked out, hoping she hadn't freaked him out.

Raph's blood ran cold. This was it. She was going to tell him how much of a freak he was and that she could never been with someone like him. "O-okay. Want me to come over to your place?"

"Hmm, is your brother's dojo far? I don't mind meeting you there if it isn't."

She was trying to find the most logical route; there was no point on him going all the way over to her lab if he had to double back. Plus, she had no idea if he was even going to agree to another sample and, in her mind, it made sense to ask on some sort of neutral ground. That, and if she requested the sample at her lab, it might seem pushy.

All these thoughts ran through her head at an indescribable speed. It was how her mind worked. And sometimes it exhausted her.

Raph stiffly gave her the directions as well as the time that training started. He thought about insisting that they meet at her place, so that when she did reject him, his brothers didn't have to see it. "I'll see you then." He hung up before she had a chance to respond. He didn't think that he could keep from saying something he might regret if he stayed on the line.

* * *

Hope turned up at the dojo fifteen minutes early. Her head felt numb and her chest, tight. It wasn't just about meeting his family. It was about the sudden change in his tone over the phone. Was this another side to him?

It wasn't the time to worry about this now. The doors were tightly shut, so she uneasily rapped her knuckles three times in the wooden surface.

* * *

Leonardo looked up from his sweeping with a frown at the knocking. They were here already? Mikey was never on time, Donnie's bus didn't get in for another ten minutes, and Raph had been moody all day, so he wouldn't be on time either. Maybe it was Raph's mysterious lady friend. Other than saying that she wanted to meet them, Leo know nothing about her. But she must be something if she kept his brother coming back.

He pulled open to door to see a tall, attractive girl standing in the door, wrapped up in a pale yellow jacket. Her long blonde hair was twisted into a messy bun and her eyes shone with curiosity as she looked him over.

"Can I help you?" he asked, not wanting to make any assumptions as to her identity.

"Uh." Came Hope's reply. She eyed the blue masked turtle. He was slightly smaller than Raph, but the same build and different face shape. Other than that he was definitely a mutant turtle. She made a mental note to ask them about the masks later. "Yeah. I'm Hope. Raphael's… uh… friend…" She gave him a nervous toothy smile and sucked in her lower lip.

 _Ah, so this is the mystery woman._ She wasn't quite what Leo had expected, but not in a bad way. She was naturally pretty, not very reliant on makeup or nice clothes, and had a nice smile. A definite upgrade from the kind of girl that usually turned Raph's head. He pushed the door open wider to allow her to enter.

"Come in. I'm glad you could come. My name is Leonardo." He bowed to her as she passed over the threshold as a gesture of genuine respect.

She awkwardly bowed back, aware it was probably completely wrong. "Um… Where are the others?" Now she had no clue what to do? Make uncomfortable conversation? Stand like a spare part in the hall way? Gripping her hands together, she looked to Leonardo for a reply.

"They'll be here soon," Leo said as he shut the door behind her. "Raph never misses the chance to wax the floor with Mikey's shell." He laughed good naturedly, hoping to make the obviously nervous girl more comfortable. "Can I get you anything? Water? Soda?"

"I'm fine, thank you." She replied politely. "I'm actually… really looking forward to seeing this. Raph told me that you guys… used to be… ninjas…?" Starting to relax, she had a good look around.

Leonardo nodded as he sat in a lotus position on the tatami mats. "Yes. Our father was a master ninja and he taught us ninjitsu since we were kids. My brothers… well, they mostly gave it up when mutants became citizens. They had their own lives to live, and being a ninja didn't have much to do with it. I decided to teach it to students who want to learn, so I opened this dojo." He waved his hand around the space.

"It's… beautiful. I admire your passion for your art." Hope took a seat a few feet away from him. "Do you have many students?" Talking became much easier as she realized he was very forthcoming in his answers.

Leo beamed, flattered by her interest. "I have five students. Three of them are kids and there's a married couple. They are very dedicated students, still coming to train here even though…"

He fell silent, struggling against his anger and frustration. Closing his eyes, he inhaled deeply as he tried to align his chi. He couldn't control the hate in the world. He could only control himself and how he responded to it. Raph had dealt with it the wrong way, and he'd paid for it.

Hope recoiled ever so slightly with his change in tone. She did understand, more than some. What with her parents leading most of the anti-mutant protests, she'd seen the speciesism up close. Now, she'd seen it from both sides. And she knew which side she was on, had always been on.

She opened her mouth to reply, but was interrupted by a curt knock on the main door. Nerves started to fill her stomach again. It had almost slipped her mind that she still had to ask Raph for another vial of blood. And judging from his odd behavior on the phone, he must have guessed what she wanted from him.

Leo rose to his feet, murmuring his excuses. He strolled to the door to see Donnie and Mikey standing outside, Donnie with a book bag slung over his shoulder and Mikey with a huge smile on his face.

"Is she here?" Mikey asked excitedly as he bounced inside the dojo. Leo didn't have time to answer for the youngest turtle fixed his gaze on Hope and ran toward her. He squatted down on the mat next to her and beamed brightly. "Hi! I'm Mikey!"

Hope couldn't help but grin. What a friendly person he was. "Hi Mikey, it's nice to meet you, I'm Hope." She extended her small hand to him.

This wasn't so bad. This new turtle put her completely at ease. And as long as she had that, she knew she'd be fine.

Donning an orange mask, similar to his brothers', Mikey had an air of naivety about him. Smaller than both Raph and Leo, he had a cheeky smile positioned on his freckled face.

"Mikey, give her some space!" Donnie said, pushing Mikey out of the way. He held out his hand to the stranger, offering his best smile. "I'm Donatello. Nice to meet you."

"H-hi." She mumbled. How was she going to remember all these names? So that was all of them. The most recent one, Donatello, was tall and much thinner than his brothers. His face was encircled with a purple mask. Her eyes darting between all three of them, she stopped thinking and her vocal cords took over. "What's with the masks?" She blurted out.

Donnie took the lead on this question. "Well, when we first began our ninja training, our sensei gave us these masks as a symbol of our identities." He tentatively touched the tails of his purple mask. "We could have stopped wearing them anytime, but it would have been like giving up a piece of ourselves."

A bang from the front door, followed by heavy footsteps made Donnie reach instinctively for an invisible Bo staff.

"Sounds like Prince Charming has made his illustrious arrival," Mikey said, looking toward the front of the dojo.

These guys were insane, in the most positive way possible. Hope decided that she liked them. She wondered how much Raph had actually told them about her. Did they know of her work? Her past? Her current living situation?

All these thoughts were cut short when she looked up and into the eyes of Raphael. It had only been a day. Why was her heart hammering so hard in her chest?

Raph had hoped to get to the dojo before Hope to prepare himself, but of course, he hadn't been that lucky. There she sat, surrounded by his brothers, looking as beautiful as she had when they were staring at the stars. She was wearing her favorite jacket too. He really liked it on her.

He grunted as he dropped his gym bag haphazardly on the floor near the door. Mikey was there in an instant, digging him in the ribs jestingly. "Dude, how'd you get such a cute girl to agree to go out with you?"

Raph ignored him, his eyes staring into hers. _Well, might as well get it over with._ Slowly, he walked over to where she was sitting.

Hope smiled up at him despite herself. It was the strangest feeling, she felt almost proud to know him. As he got closer to her she detected a hint of annoyance in his eyes, potentially even irritation. Whatever it was, she could definitely tell that he was not as pleased to see her as she was him.

"Hey. Are you alright?" she enquired anxiously once he reached her.

"Fine. So what was it you wanted to talk about?" He asked glaring down on her. He could sense his brothers' confused glances to one another, and it fueled his annoyance. Why was she looking so concerned? Wasn't this going to be hard enough without her looking so innocent?

She'd managed to get so relaxed around his brothers that she'd almost forgotten that there was the issue of asking him for more blood samples.

As she wasn't sure about how much he'd actually told his family about her research, she thought it best to speak privately.

"Uh, guys, can you give us a sec…?" She directed to the others.

Leo looked between Raph and Hope, wondering about the amount of tension he felt between those two. "Sure. Come on, guys. Let's warm up." He passed through the doorway into an inner room that was used for practice. Even Mikey complied and he and Donnie followed after him.

When they had gone, Raph turned to Hope again. She looked embarrassed, which really puzzled him. "So what is it?" He asked gruffly.

She couldn't comprehend why there was such an icy air around him. Was it possible that he had worked out that she had destroyed the vial, and that she needed a new sample from him? She needed to let him know that it was an accident; that she didn't do it on purpose. She chose her words carefully.

"I made a stupid mistake…" She started, focusing her eyes on a spot on the ground.

Raph closed his eyes and felt his heart sink into the soles of his feet. He knew it had been too good to be true. Biting the inside of his cheek, he tried to keep up a solid front. "I get it. You don't have to sugar coat it for me. Whatever you say, I'll… I'll respect that."

His reaction perplexed her. Sugar coat? Respect? What was he on about?

"Uh… I accidentally… smashed… my last vial of your… blood… I'm going to… kind of… sort of… need to ask you for… more…" She held up her hands before he could reply and spoke rapidly. "I'm so close to a breakthrough on my theory. I just need to test it on your DNA. So just one maybe two vials would do. But I… understand… if you'd rather not…"

"What?" His head was spinning as he tried to wrap his head around what she had said. She just needed another vial of blood? She wasn't going to tell him to get out of her life? He wasn't sure what he should do, but not sounding like an idiot was high on his list. "Sure. Of course, you can have all the blood you need. I've got plenty."

"What's… going on, man?" She asked slowly. His whole body language had abruptly changed from being tensed up to fully relaxed, like a weight had been lifted from his shoulders. She eyed him carefully trying to ascertain what had changed so quickly.

"It's nothin'. I was bein' stupid that's all. What did you think of the guys?" He wanted to change the subject as quickly as possible. He'd rather dress up in a French maid's costume and walk across Manhattan than admit to Hope that he thought that she was going to dump him. They weren't dating or anything, so why had he been so paranoid about that in the first place?

Hope decided to dismiss his odd behavior. Maybe it was a mutant turtle thing?

"Oh they're lovely! So welcoming!" She beamed. "I'm so looking forward to watching you train. Did you bring your… sais?" This was something she was very excited about. She hoped he'd let her hold them.

Raph gave her a sidelong smirk which clearly said 'Of course I did.' Walking back over to the doorway, he grabbed his gym bag and unzipped it. He pulled the heavy metal weapons out of the bag and held them tightly in his fists. Feeling their cold metal surface against his palms made him remember all the time that he'd used them against enemies. It gave him a sense of power that he never got tired of. He spun them expertly between his fingers before striking them together with a loud clang. "What do you think?"

Hope's baby blue eyes sparkled in awe. They were even more magnificent than she imagined. "Wow…" a soft gasp left her throat.

Raph was gratified with her response. "Let's catch up with the guys and get this thing started. He followed her into the inner training area wand showed her where she could sit comfortable to watch the practice. Leo and Donnie were already sparring on the mats as they made themselves comfortable next to Mikey.

Mikey leaned over to whisper to Hope, "Everything okay?"

"I believe so." She smiled contently. She wondered how all this was going to work, after all, she'd never seen anyone fight before, not without purposefully trying to hurt one another. Curiosity gripped her senses as she relaxed into her seat and awaited the fun.

* * *

Leo parried a strike from Donnie's staff before knocking him off his feet. Donnie landed on his shell with a loud smack and coughed as he tried to get his breath back.

"And the match is mine!" Leo declared, holding the top of his sword over his brother. "Who's next?" He asked as he looked over his brothers. Raph stood up and after casting a wink at Hope, joined Leo on the mats.

"Ooh! This is gonna be good!" Mikey said to Hope with a grin. "Raphie's out to impress, so he's really going to give Leo a run for his money."

Hope gave Mikey a fearful nod. She had been watching half of the event from behind her hands, peering through her fingers. Having never been this close to the action before, the noise of Leo's blade reverberated through the dojo like thunder and it shocked her.

But now her attention was piqued. A chance to see Raphael fight. Ever since the incident with the gun, Hope had been furtively curious as to what he could do.

Now that'd she'd had a small taster from his brothers, Hope was sure it was going to be good.

Raph crouched into position and watched as Leo did the same. After a moment's pause, they both sprang into action. Raph immediately jabbed with the blades of his sais, only to be blocked by the katana blades. He kicked his brother in the plastron, driving him back. Taking the opportunity he lunged for Leo with a roar. There was a loud clang of metal as their weapons locked together, staving the other off.

He strained to get the upper hand, but Leo wouldn't give him an inch. Jerking the sais down suddenly, he pulled the katanas out of Leo's hands. Once he was unarmed, he hooked his sai over Leo's arm and threw him over his shoulder. He hit the mat with a loud thud and a wheeze of pain.

It all happened so fast that Hope had trouble keeping up with the red and blue blurs. A jolt of excitement shot through her veins. Beads of sweat glistened on Raph's forehead and trickled down his face in droplets to pool at the top of his plastron. Hope had trouble catching her breath at the sight of him. He was so passionate, so absorbed in the session; it made her swell with pride.

Raph glanced over at Hope and smiled at the thrilled look in her eyes. She was eating this all up. He had to show her more of what he could do. Turning to Mikey, he said, "Come on, who's next?" Mikey found a spot on the floor of particular interest.

Leo groaned as he dropped down next to Donnie. "No, he's right. You're up."

Mikey pouted. "But I've got a broadcast this afternoon!"

Sighing, Leo looked up at Raph. "No face shots, okay?"

"Whatever. Let's do this," Raph said, twirling his sais.

It was one of those things, that until you'd seen it with your own eyes, you wouldn't realize how much you'd be into it. This was exactly how Hope felt at this moment. It wasn't negative fighting; it was for entertainment. She pulled her knees up to her chest in anticipation of the next round.

Begrudgingly, Mikey pulled out his chucks and squared off against his brother. Raph had always been hard on his little brother during practice so he didn't expect to be let off easy, especially since the cute blonde chick was here and watching with big doe eyes. Mikey had seen the chemistry between them straightaway. He wondered if the girl could see how crazy Raph was about her. Probably not though. And Raph might be just as clueless.

"Hajime!" Leo barked and Raph flew at him like a bullet out of a gun. Mikey squealed and tried to dodge the impact but he might as well have been trying to dodge a charging bull on roller skates. They went down in a heap, a tangle of arms and legs. Mikey tried to dislodge himself from Raph's grip, but his brother jerked his arm to keep him pinned.

Mikey felt a sharp pop in his shoulder, followed by white hot pain. He cried out and immediately, Raph released him, his eyes wide with concern.

"Mikey! God, I'm sorry!" He stumbled backwards on his hands and knees.

Hope instinctively dashed to the injured turtle's side. Examining him while he grimaced in pain, she gave him a reassuring smile. She held onto his hand and looked into his eyes.

"Hey, it's okay, man. It's just a dislocated shoulder. This used to happen to my brother all the time. It's actually what made me want to become a doctor, but by the time I'd finished my medical degree, I realized I wanted to be in genetics, so I moved my fellowship to that. But it's okay, I still remember a thing or two. And sometimes my brother would look at me exactly like that. But then I'd just-" She sharply pushed up with a twisting motion and his shoulder joint popped back into place, "-talk. Until I fixed it."

"Thanks!" Mikey said, flexing his sore arm. "That's gonna leave a mark though… " He looked around, searching for Raph, but he was gone. "Where's Raph?"

"Aw, man…," Leo said, shaking his head.

Hope followed Leo's gaze. "What? What's wrong? Where is he?" She started to panic, seeing the anguished look on his brothers' faces.

"For the past couple of years, since… well, since he came home, he's been paranoid about hurting people. He pulls punches that he didn't before. And when we spar, if he hurts one of us accidentally, he'll disappear for days." He fidgeted nervously with one of his mask tails, hesitant to go on.

Mikey took up the tale, not nearly as shy with Raph's secrets as Leo. "He'll turn his phone off so we can't find him. When he does come back, he reeks of booze and weed and… other stuff." He suddenly looked sheepish as he glanced at Hope. "We need to find him. He's… got a lot of stuff he's working out, but he's gonna hurt himself."

Hope looked terrified. "Well we have to find him. He can't go on like that. I won't let him." She told them firmly. They'd only known each other a couple of weeks, but deep down, she knew there was more to their friendship. They were meant to meet the way they did. And even though it was tough to hear about his issues, she didn't want to see him hurting.

"We'll split up and cover more ground," Leo said, looking between the group. "Mikey, you're with me. Donnie, take Hope and scope out the park. You know some of the places he's gone, so if he's not there, branch out."

He took Hope's hands between his and pressed them to show his gratitude. "I'm so sorry. I'm sure Raph wouldn't have wanted to scare you, but he's just… scared. And he doesn't know how to deal with it."

Hope nodded solemnly and stared up into his indigo colored eyes. "I… um… I really… uh… I really care about him, Leo…" She admitted and cast her gaze towards to ground.

Leo smiled, knowing that she was completely genuine. "I'm glad. Raph could use a friend like you looking out for him." He turned to his team with determination. "Let's move out!"


	6. Chapter 6

Donnie gestured for Hope to follow him and they hurried down the busy sidewalk toward Central Park. "So, how did you meet Raph?" He asked curiously.

"I was standing in line at a coffee shop. I dropped all my change on the floor. He helped me pick it up. Then he asked me if I wanted to go for a drink." She shrugged. "We did. And that's it. Not very… exciting. He did me a favor with my research, which I really appreciated." They reached the entrance of the park, and Hope looked up at him nervously.

"You're a scientist? What's your field?" he asked excitedly, his face lighting up with interest. They passed a group of teenagers in Goth getup loitering near the park entrance. One of them shouted an obscenity at Donnie and the rest laughed darkly. Donnie ignored them, knowing that they were just full of hot air, but he drew Hope a little closer to him instinctively.

Hope grinned at him, loving that she got to speak about her work. She explained all about her genetics work and her current research with mutant DNA. "So now I'm just trying to get that last piece of the puzzle to finally create a serum to make mutants human." She finished.

"Wow. That's… incredible. And Raph's been helping you with this?" He asked as they walked along the bike paths. There was no sign of Raph at all. Donnie was worried that they were on a wild goose chase. Damn him for turning off his tracking device. Maybe he should just slip one into his shell…

"I say help. He let me have a sample of his blood. I've never been… friends… with a mutant before. I've never had the chance to analyze a sample. I'm so grateful to him…" A worried darkness crossed her face. "He's… not here, is he…?" She asked Donatello, wringing her hands.

Donnie sighed and rubbed his eyes. "It doesn't look like it. But it's a big park. He could be here. There've been a few places we've found him before, so we're going to check there first." He looked down at her and smiled. She looked so scared on his brother's behalf. He wanted to assure her that Raph was okay, but even he couldn't be sure if that.

* * *

They searched the park for hours, asking strangers if they had seen him and checking previous hangout spots. Finally, they found themselves back at the park entrance.

"I think we can call it," Donnie said, rubbing at his tired eyes. "He's not in the park. Guess we should start casing his favorite bars and clubs."

She felt completely disheartened. She really believed they would find him there. All she wanted to do was reassure him, keep him safe. But that didn't seem possible. Hearing of the things he did when he got down almost shattered her from within.

"Lead the way." Hope gestured out on front of them, hanging her head.

They spent three hours going to different bars and clubs across the burrow. Donnie hated the smell of all those places. Very few of them were the kind of place that he would want to take April, or any girl for that matter. Finally, they came to a run-down bar on the East River. Donnie pushed the door open and allowed Hope to enter ahead of him.

There was Raph, slumped at the bar with a half-full mug in his hand. His eyes were hooded and bleary when he turned toward them. Donnie grimaced. He looked like shit. He looked down at Hope and was saddened at how horror-stricken she was at Raph's drunken state.

Hope stormed straight up to him, suddenly fueled with anger. "What the hell are you doing, man?!" She erupted at him. This was no way to deal with problems. Sure, she knew he'd been through a lot, but his brother was virtually unharmed, and this was just an overreaction.

Raph blinked at her in surprise before turning away to face the dingy rows of bottles lining the walls. "Whadder ya doin' 'ere?" He slurred, staring at the suds floating on top of his drink. "Ya… shuldn't be 'ere."

"We are here to-" she gripped his forearm with her shaking hand, "-take you home. This is ridiculous, Raphael!" She studied his features: his eyes were brimmed with angst, his mouth curved into an ungrateful scowl. This was wrong. So wrong.

"I ken take carea myself. Jest… go 'way. 'N take the beanpole wid ya." He tried to stand, but his legs crumbled under him and he fell in a heap on the dusty floor.

"Oh my god…" Hope breathed in completely abashed by his behavior. She pinched the bridge of her nose and looked to Donatello for guidance.

Donnie hated seeing Raph like this. Hope was right. He was being stupid about it all and how he was dealing with it was so destructive. Heaving a sigh, he stooped down and heaved his brother up. He snaked his arm around his shell and pulled him to his feet. Raph's deadweight was like lifting a small horse and he staggered under the weight. "Little help?"

She obliged his request and mimicked his hold on Raph's other side. Taking half of his weight tested her tiny frame, but she battled on as they maneuvered the intoxicated turtle out of the dingy bar.

"Quit yer bitchin'," Raph mumbled as he staggered between them. "Seriously, I'm…" He promptly vomited all over the pavement, earning a groan of disgust from his escorts.

"Shut up, Raph. You're drunk." Donnie said roughly as he stepped over the pile of sick and basically dragged the group to the corner. "Hope, get us a cab. I'm not dragging his drunk ass back to the lair by myself."

She did as instructed and hailed a cab from the sidewalk. Several passed them by, the human drivers giving them anxious looks, before a small weedy mutant with a rodent shaped face pulled up. "Is he okay?" He asked, his whiskers twitching.

"He's just a little drunk." Hope replied, helping ease Raph into the backseat. "Where are we going…?" She asked Donatello who was looking a little worse for wear.

"We're taking him home," he answered curtly. He was pissed for a number of reasons. He had an important test he needed to be studying for, he needed to call April and he was supposed to be taking care of dinner. But no. He was tracking down his stupid ass of a brother who was drowning himself in alcohol in a rat hole by the river. "Can you help me get him in the lair?"

"Of course I will. I'm not leaving him until I know he's safe." She told him firmly. Tension was building between them, with Raph being the epicenter of it.

Raph groaned and put his head between his knees. "Oh, no you don't!" Donnie warned as he pulled his brother up to a sitting position. "If you barf in this taxi, I swear to God, I will kill you!" Raph murmured something and closed his eyes.

Sighing, he looked over at Hope. "I am so sorry you had to see this. This… it's not usually like him. Like Leo said, he's scared of what he's capable of doing. Because of what he did to that guy…"

"He told me about that…" She said absentmindedly staring at Raph. "It's okay… I just want him to be okay." She started tracing her fingers on his shell designs, believing, as he'd told her before, that he couldn't feel it.

Donnie noticed the intimate gesture and wondered if she knew that it was a very sensitive spot. He didn't have to wonder long because Raph moaned lustily, "Mmm baby, that feels so damn good."

Her hand shot from his back to rest on her now scarlet cheek. "What the fuck was that?!" She blurted. Cursing wasn't normally in her vocabulary, but the shock she felt from Raph's seemly random expression had caught her off guard.

Donnie covered his mouth to keep himself from laughing at the outburst. After a moment, he said, "Our shells are actually fairly sensitive, even though they look rigid. When someone touches our shells that way, it releases endorphins in our brains; makes us feel good." He wanted to be more reassuring, though he was sure that Raph hadn't told her this little detail. "When you did it before, he didn't say anything?"

She shook her head, covering her face with embarrassment. "No, he just said that he barely felt anything…" Peeping through the gaps in her fingers, she added in a mumble, "the patterns his shell makes are so beautiful. There's something therapeutic about tracing them…" She then thought back to the couple of times when she'd done it before and looked down at Raph, who had fallen asleep in his hands and was lightly snoring.

"Big softie," Donnie said under his breath, shaking his head. "He probably didn't want to creep you out by telling you the truth." Leaning his head against the glass of the window, he heaved a deep sigh. "My fiancé tells me that my shell is beautiful a lot. And she said the same thing about tracing the designs. It helps her unwind after a long day, and it really does feel amazing."

Raph moaned in his sleep, his eyelids fluttering softly. "Sorry… 'M sorry… 'S ma fault…" He fell silent again. Donnie watched his brother sleeping for a moment before he spoke again.

"I never let anyone touch my shell like that before April, because it's so intimate. The fact that Raph lets you do it really says a lot. He's not really one to let people get close."

Hope bit her lip at Donatello's words. What did that mean? That there was a chance that Raph liked her in that way? She was so confused right now.

She took his crimson mask tails in her hands and began to roll them compulsively. Anyone looking in at this situation from the outside would see this conflicted turtle as a burden. However, she just wanted him to be okay. She felt she'd do anything to make that happen.

Making a mental note to ask Donnie about his feelings on the mutant marriage laws and his fiancé, she kept silent for the rest of the journey and watched Raphael while he slept.

* * *

Donnie and Hope finally got Raph back to the lair, both of them exhausted from the effort. He had called Leo when they got out of the cab, telling him that they'd found Raph and that he was alright. The other turtles were waiting in the pit when they stumbled through the door.

"Ugh, he smells like a barf bag," Mikey said, holding his nose as they set him down on the couch.

"Probably because he threw up twice before we got back," Donnie muttered. "I gotta get back to the apartment. April's understanding only goes so far. It was nice meeting you," he said to Hope and he left briskly.

"Ugh, should we shower him tonight or tomorrow?" Mikey asked, looking to Leo for guidance.

"He can do it himself in the morning. The big idiot needs to learn somehow." Leo sat down on the sofa next to Raph's head and untied his mask. He handed it to Hope, who was the closest to him, and heaved his inebriated brother into his arms.

"I'm taking him to bed. Make yourself comfortable, Hope. If you need anything, Mikey can get it for you." He left, staggering a little under Raph's weight.

When they were out of sight, Mikey turned to Hope and asked, "Where was he?"

"Some awful bar on the East River…" She replied while having a good look around their home.

When Donnie had mentioned a lair, she sure hadn't expected this. Sure Raph had told her that they'd lived in the sewers when they were younger, but she couldn't figure out why they were still down here.

At the moment he had removed the manhole cover and allowed her to enter first, Hope had been mildly confused. Why would they still feel the need to hide after all these years of mutants being free?

But now that she was actually down here, it began to dawn on her. This was their home. And it had been all their lives. Why give that up?

It certainly felt homely, what with the old battered sofa and television set in the pit. She also spied a tight little kitchen to her left. It was certainly lived in.

"How's your shoulder?" She asked Mikey, brushing her fingers over the area.

"It's okay, just a little swollen. Trust me, I've gotten a lot worse." He hesitated for a moment before looking sheepishly at her again. She looked worn out and stressed to nearly the breaking point, but she was holding up well. _She's got a backbone on her_. "So what do you think?" He asked, gesturing around the lair. "It won't be featured in Good Housekeeping, but it's comfy."

Giving him a weary chuckle, she nodded and yawned. "It's… different. But I can see that it's home." Her head rolled slightly on her shoulders as she struggled to keep her eyes open.

She looked like she was about fall over so he sat down on the couch and patted the cushion next to him, inviting her to sit with him. "You've earned some R and R. Take a load off."

All she wanted to do was pass out now. It had been a very eventful day indeed. She took up his offer and sat heavily next to him. Taking a second to relax herself, she promptly closed her eyes and fell into a deep sleep.

* * *

Raph awoke the next morning with a pounding headache and an acrid taste in his mouth. The past day was a complete blur, but he was somehow back in his bedroom, not passed out in some back alley this time. Dragging himself out of bed, he slumped into the open area and froze.

Hope was asleep on the couch, covered by a tattered quilt. Leo sat nearby, a steaming mug in his hands. The look he gave Raph would have exploded his skull if he had the ability.

"You should shower before she wakes up," he said coldly. "If you really want to save what you have with her, you should at least make yourself presentable."

Raph felt his stomach drop as it came home to him what must have happened. And images of what he said to her at the bar came into focus in his mind. He turned on his heel and went straight to the bathroom. He needed to work out what he was going to say to her, and whatever he said, it had better be good.

The strong smell of coffee pulled Hope out of her uncomfortable slumber. She slowly creaked open her eyes which widened slightly when she realized where she was. "M-morning…" She croaked at Leo.

"Morning. You sleep well?" He asked, handing her the steaming mug in his hand.

"Thanks." She said, taking the cup by its handle and sipping the contents. "I was pretty tired and this is better than my… uh… current bed." She looked around the area. "Have you checked on him…?" She whispered, unsure of his whereabouts.

Leo's jaw set. "He's in the shower." He watched as she sipped the coffee thoughtfully. "He looks like crap, but he walked there on his own, which is pretty good."

Hope opened her mouth, but hesitated. "I-I… um… I don't know… what to say… to him…" Her mind was filled with all the scenarios which could possibly take place. But nothing was settling. It irked her some.

"You don't have to say anything to him," he said, annoyance darkening his features. "He should be explaining himself to you. He had no business putting you in that position."

"I suppose not…" she trailed off. They sat in an amicable silence, Hope nursing her coffee, until they heard the click of the bathroom lock. Nerves started to build in her stomach, churning the coffee inside.

Raph came out of the bathroom, mopping his face with a towel. He stopped when he saw Hope and Leo staring at him. He felt defensive under their stares, though he knew that he had no reason to feel like that. Clearing his throat, he said, "Mornin'."

Despite the fact that she should be really annoyed at him for his ridiculous behavior, Hope was overwhelmed to see him. He might have been a bit idiotic to go the way he did, but she still cared about him regardless. Because of this, she failed to hide the smile which had crept up upon her face. "Morning."

Why the hell was she smiling? Why wasn't she chewing him out? He could not make this girl out. Leo, however, was not shy about his contempt. Ignoring him completely, Raph tried to match her smile. "Ya had breakfast yet?"

She eyed him up and down. He seemed to have slept off the night before and she wasn't sure how much he actually remembered.

Shaking her head at his question, she held her breath for a second, forcing herself not to get up and cling to him for dear life.

 _Play it cool, Hope._ She instructed herself.

He'd better get the hard part over with… If he waited, he might bow out of it completely. Stepping down into the pit and ignoring the pounding behind his eyes, he took her hands in both of his.

"About last night… I don't… I can't… I mean… I'm sorry." His voice shook, and he felt his face flushing brightly. "I don't know how much ya saw or heard and I'm sure I made a complete ass of myself, but it had nothin' to do with you. It was all me."

Her heart was pounding like a drum in her chest. She looked down at their clasped hands and inhaled deeply. "Raphael…" She started, but her words failed her.

Her eyes darted across to Leo, who was staring at the couple quizzically. "Can you give us a minute, please…?" She asked.

Once his judging brother had vacated the area, Hope looked directly in Raph's bloodshot eyes. She had never thought it would play out this way, but her decision was made.

Her mind was racing and it was hard to collect her thoughts, but she briskly drafted a rough oration of what she wanted to express.

She loosened her grip on his calloused hands and cleared her throat. "Look. I care about you. A lot more than I probably should. I can see you have issues… I understand that. But…" She blinked a couple of times and looked up to the damp ceiling, forcing the water in her eyes to stay put, "I will not hang around to watch you torture yourself. You have to let me help you…" She sucked her lower lip in and directed her focus back to him.

Raph's heart was pounding hard in his ears as he stared into her beautiful face. She was so earnest to save him from himself, but was that possible? He wasn't so sure anymore. He closed his eyes, unable to bear her pleading eyes any longer.

"Hope, you don't understand," he said brokenly. "Everything I touch, I break. I… I might lose control and hurt you. I'm not safe, and if I ever did anything to you… I wouldn't be able to live with myself."

 _It might be better if she left,_ he thought miserably. _Maybe she'll be safer that way._

"So do you want me to go…?" Hope choked out. She closed her eyes tightly to dam up the river threatening to break free, but it was too much. Hot, salty tears tore their way from her pained eyes and weaved their way down her soft cheeks.

She knew with her very being that she didn't want to leave him. The connection they had was magnetic, one she'd never felt before. He was stubborn, Hope could see that, but this… this was beyond thinking.

She snapped back to reality and wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. Some droplets had clung to her eyelashes and refused to budge. She dreaded his answer, but convinced herself to meet his gaze.

He was horrified to see her cry. And he had caused her distress. Cupping her face in his hands, he brushed the remaining tears away with his thumbs. Her skin was so smooth and soft.

"Don't cry. Please, don't cry." He pulled her close to his plastron and held her tightly, stroking her smooth blonde hair comfortingly.

"I'm pathetic," he said over the top of her head. "I run from my demons like a scared little kid, dive inside of a bottle and everyone I care about pays for it. I always say I'll stop, but when it comes to it… I can't."

Tears pooled in his own eyes, but he was too tired to stop them. They dropped off his face and onto her hair, glistening like droplets of gold.

"I don't wanna lose you, but I don't trust myself with you."

She sobbed harder with his last words. He did want her to leave. Who was she kidding? Of course he didn't want her. This was just some fantasy that she'd concocted in her head.

They stayed like that, weeping in each other's arms, for what felt like hours. She was physically hurting from within, her body aching from her heaving crying.

Finally, she built up the courage to speak. "I… I want… to help you… but I understand…" She pulled herself back from his embrace, preparing to leave.

He pulled her back and kissed her, covering her mouth with his with the desperation of a drowning man searching for a lifeline. There was a sweetness and fire in the kiss that was beyond anything that he had felt in a very long time. For a moment, he forgot his fear and uncertainty. His only thought was on this moment and this woman. If letting her go was the only way to keep her safe, he would do it, but not without letting her know how special she was to him.

Her eyes grew wide, but the shock of his unanticipated action soon wore off and Hope kissed him back, allowing herself to completely lose her mind in him.

Her brain had shut down, freeing up space for her heart to take over. In all honesty, she'd only been kissed once in her life, but nothing compared to this. It was so full of energy, making all the hairs on her body raise like she'd been hit by a bolt of electricity.

It lasted only seconds, and by the time they broke off, she felt herself yearning for more. But was this the end?

He looked into her eyes and saw wild joy and passion alight there. He smoothed her hair back from her face and kissed her again, more delicately this time. She leaned into him, her hands pressed against his plastron. God, she was beautiful.

"I've got a lot of shit that I've gotta work through. I bet you picked up on that," he said with a self-conscious smirk. "And if you don't want to deal with it, I understand. I won't stop you." He kissed her forehead, pressing his lips there for a long moment. "But if you think you can handle all that…" He allowed the sentiment to hang in the air between them.

She shook her head violently from side to side. "I'm not going anywhere." How could she? Not after this. Her whole body ached for him, even though he was right there in front of her. This is all she wanted. He was all she wanted.

She was going to help him through this, whatever way she could. But she couldn't abandon him now. This was the final connection between them, and she knew now that her heart was his.

He folded her in his arms and buried his face in her hair. His spirit was soaring with her assertion that she would stay with him. If it meant keeping her safe and happy, he'd fight every monster that would ever threaten her, even the demons in his own soul. Straightening himself, he kissed her lightly on the mouth once more, marveling at the velvety texture of her lips.

"Come on, I think I promised you some breakfast, didn't I?"

He led her to the kitchen area by her hand, and she positioned herself at the small, wooden table, her hands propping up her head.

The stress from the previous night was washed away with this new feeling in her bones. It made her feel warm, like there was a little campfire sizzling away in her chest.

She watched as he whipped together a small meal for them both, and they laughed and flirted with their new found feelings finally breaking the surface.

Mikey curiously watch from the doorway as Raph placed a plate in front of Hope before establishing himself at the table with his own. The girl was positively glowing and Raph seemed to be gliding with each movement.

The peck on the lips that she gave his brother told Mikey everything that he needed to know, though a blind person could have seen how much these two were into each other. It was just really nice to see Raph have someone like that in his life.

"Atta boy," he murmured to himself with a smile as he turned away and headed back towards his own room. He'd missed the broadcast of his web series yesterday, and he needed to make sure of the camera stuff was working.


	7. Chapter 7

"You know what?" Hope announced after swallowing a forkful of scrambled eggs, "I'm going to blow off work today. It's one of the many perks of working for yourself. We should do something." She gave him a dazzling smile, making it almost impossible for him to refuse.

Raph shoved the crust of his toast into his mouth and washed it down with a swig of coffee. "Okay. What kind of something do you have in mind?"

Hope shrugged, unable to wipe the smile from her face, "I dunno. A walk?" She envisioned the sun beating down on their skin, holding hands, strolling by the river. She sighed contently and gazed up at him with huge eyes.

Raph tucked a wayward strand of hair behind her ear, resting his hand against her cheek. "A walk sounds great. You ready?"

She pushed her plate toward the center of the table. "Yeah, let's go!" Even though they'd spent time together before, it now felt different somehow. She couldn't place it, but she was sure it was because of the absence of pressure. The fact that all their feelings were out in the open; she no longer had to worry about whether or not he liked her.

They started towards the exit, but she stopped. "Wait." She got up on her tip toes and wrapped her arms around his neck. Pulling their faces together, she met his lips with hers and kissed him gently. "Sorry, I just needed to do that… again…" She whispered into his mouth.

Raph kissed her back warmly, cupping the back of her head with his huge hand. "You have no idea how badly I needed that too," he said when he came up for air.

She inhaled deeply, breathing in his scent. "We should… go…"

They headed out into the morning air. It was welcome after a night in the sewer. The morning sun shone down on them, blinding her slightly. She blinked, trying to focus her vision.

They walked along the sidewalk, their fingers entwined. Raph could see that they were getting a lot of attention from other pedestrians, mostly frowns and scowls. He didn't care, but he really didn't want any of them to make a scene. Not today.

"So, when do you want that blood sample?"

Hope was blissfully unaware of the looks that they were getting from passersbys. Her brain should have been telling her that it was actually very rare to see an interspecies couple out and about, but she was completely fixed on him.

"I almost forgot about that! Oh man, I have so much work to do… But tomorrow. I want to enjoy… this… first." She bit her lip and lovingly gazed up at him.

She'd never been in a proper relationship before, human or otherwise, and had no idea what to expect. But it was a journey she knew she'd enjoy.

She didn't seem to be bothered by their staring, so Raph swallowed his annoyance and draped his arm over her shoulder. Pulling her close, he kissed her temple gently. She smelled so good and her hair was so soft. He was amazed that a girl so beautiful, and a human at that, would be interested in him. But he wasn't going to question it. Not now. "Okay. Anytime you're ready, I'm ready."

Hope wanted to show to the world that mutants and humans could just as easily have relationships. She held her head high as they walked, laughing and joking, enjoying every minute.

"Raphie!" A shrill voice called out. A small woman, skinny and busty, bright red hair down to her waist, bolted up to them, completely ignoring Hope. The woman flung herself at Raph and kissed his cheek.

Hope stepped back from the scene, feeling slightly awkward. What was this?

"Brooke? I… What are you doing here?" Raph stammered, completely taken aback by his ex-girlfriend's sudden embrace. He hadn't seen her in almost two years, and now she was here, throwing herself at him again like no time had passed.

She jumped up and down excitedly on her toes and embraced him again. "Never mind me!" She squeaked, making a ringing noise in Hope's ears, "I haven't seen you in so long! I didn't even know you were out!" She let go of him and stepped back, her expression suddenly turning darker. "Why didn't you contact me?"

It started to dawn on Hope who this girl was. She felt her chest tighten, unaware of how Raph would react. Was their relationship going to end before it even really began? Her breathing quickened and she felt her eyes start to sting.

Raph looked past Brooke into Hope's face. She looked like she was going to cry and he started to panic. Of all the days for her to appear, it had to be today? Reaching behind his head, he broke Brooke's hold on his neck.

"I didn't call you because I thought we were done. You didn't return any of the letters I wrote you in the first year, Brooke. What was I supposed to think? I thought you didn't want to have anything to do with me anymore."

Brooke looked slightly miffed, but shrugged her petite shoulders. "What can I say? A girl has needs." Her eyes flashed him a seductive look. "We could finish where we left off?" She turned round and raised her eyebrow at Hope. Looking her up and down, disgust showing on her perfectly made up face, "You know, if you're not too busy."

Hope blinked a couple of times, completely paralyzed. This was certainly a situation that she could not work her way out of. All she wanted to do was have the ground swallow her up.

He felt his lip curl at the way that Brooke was propositioning him. Did she really think that they could go back to screwing around the way that they had five years ago? It was almost sad, but then again, she was about as fucked up as he was.

"I don't think that's a good idea. Besides, Hope and I were going somewhere." Raph reached out and took Hope's small hand in his, giving her a light, reassuring squeeze.

They walked away, leaving Raph's forward ex-girlfriend gawping after them. Hope felt her heart swelling with pride in her chest. He could easily have gone back to her. Nothing was stopping him. Hope didn't feel she was especially pretty. Not like Brooke. She had a model's physique, the ideal woman. But he'd chosen Hope.

"Well you handled that brilliantly…" She whispered, gripping his hand tightly.

"Thanks," he said, coloring a little at her praise. "She made the choice easier by thinking I was the same kind of guy I was before I went to Riker's. I forgot that she was such a slut."

Raph brought her fingers up to his lips and kissed her knuckles lightly. "You aren't like that. You respect yourself enough not to throw yourself at any guy that come within a few feet of you. If you were, you would have come home with me that first night when I offered."

Hope blushed scarlet. There was a reason for that, but she wasn't ready to tell him just yet. "Thank you… for not abandoning me…" She croaked out, starting to well up with tears again.

Seeing that she was about to cry again, Raph pulled her into his arms. He could feel her trembling against his plastron. "Never. I will never leave you alone. Not for anything."

Tipping her chin up, he kissed the tears off of her cheeks, slowly working his way down to her mouth. He didn't think that he would ever get tired of the way that she tasted.

"Come on, show me your smile," he coaxed with a soft smile.

"These are happy tears, Raphael." She corrected, breaking into a smile that filled her face. "My life, us, this is just… perfect." She whispered the last word, not wanting to seem too clingy with him.

Curiously about his ex was churning in her mind. It wouldn't go away unless she just asked outright. "I'm sorry if this… um… ruins the moment, but I need to… know…" She looked up at his face as they started walking again, "How… serious were you… with… uh… Brooke…?"

Raph frowned, suddenly unable to meet her eyes. This probably would ruin the moment. Might ruin a lot of them. "She… We weren't planning on getting married or anything. It was… we just…," he stopped, trying to get himself together.

"She wanted to know if… parts of mutant turtles are… bigger than a normal man's. And… I showed her." Shane burned brightly in his face at the admission. "It didn't mean anything with her. It was just sex with us. I… I never loved her."

She knew it would be hard to hear. Her hypothesis was correct. But she was the one to ask and she got her answer. It almost felt like he was convincing her that she meant more to him than Brooke did, and that made her warm a little inside.

"Well sex isn't love, that's for sure." She blurted without thinking. Closing her eyes and sucking her teeth, she wanted to take her words back, but they had already set a course for his ears.

Raph was puzzled at her sentiment. "Why do you say that?" He asked, concerned about the distressed look on her face.

Well now she'd opened up that can of worms. There was no point in hiding it from him now. If they were going to have a proper relationship, she needed to be open and honest with him.

She bit hard on her lip and her body tensed up. "Look. This is going to be… hard for you to hear. Especially since…" she waved her arm behind them to indicate she meant Brooke, "… you've… a lot… with… you know." Her head was spinning. "I've never… been… with anyone." Now that it was out, she started to ramble, "I've never had a relationship. I've been kissed exactly once, and even that was a dare in high school. I got so wrapped up in my work that I didn't have the time, or effort to find anyone. And then when I got to the point where I wanted to, I wanted it to be with someone… who made me feel… well… Like this."

His heart softened as he saw how embarrassed she was admitting this. "I wish I'd waited… For someone like you." Sighing, he rubbed his fingers lightly over the tops of her fingers. "I never thought of sex as love either. Just a way to make me feel good."

He, in turn, bit his lip uncertainly. "So, I won't ever ask you to do something you won't be comfortable with. We will go as fast or as slow as you want."

She was overwhelmed with her feelings for him. He still wasn't running a hundred miles an hour away from her. This was a good sign.

She stopped walking and unclasped their hands. Bringing her arms around his neck, she whispered into his ear, "Thank you. You'll just have to keep me right."

"I think I can do that," he said, hugging her tight. Lifting her up, he spun her around in circles playfully, grinning like a little kid at a toy store.

* * *

They spent the rest of their morning playing out Hope's image of their date perfectly. The sun stayed above their heads, warming their skin. They chatted about little things, big things, even a small amount about his anger issues.

Eventually they started to get worn out and found a bench overlooking the river. Hope settled down, spreading her body across the bench and laying her head in his lap. From there she continued their conversation about her research.

"If I do manage to perfect it, do you think many mutants will come forward for it? To become human?" She asked, desperate for an honest answer.

Raph thought about that for a little while. "I think some will want to be human again. Not sure how many. We'll just have to see."

"For the mutants that were not human before, like you, it might mean that they could finally have a family. I haven't ironed out the fine details yet, but it's definitely a possibility." She replied, stroking his hand. It was a well-known fact that the few interspecies couples who had tried to conceive had all failed, and tests proved that it was virtually impossible. "Some mutants have become used to being part of a humanoid community. This might be the breakthrough they need." Hope felt positive about her work. It just needed to be advertised in a positive manner.

Raph hadn't really thought much about having a family of his own before. He just never believed that it would ever happen for him. But then again, he never thought he would find someone that would make him feel like this. He smoothed the hair away from her face, his fingertips lightly grazing her skin. "Yeah, that might be something that interests a lot of mutants. Might even change a lot of opinions."

He decided to ask. It was something that he had wondered for a long time, and now he felt like he needed to know. "Do… you think I should change? When you finish it?"

She was a little taken aback by his question. After all, he'd been a mutant for almost the entirety of his life. It was normal for him. She mulled this over for a long while, staring up at the sky, keeping a tight hold of his hand.

Would she want him to change? She hadn't fallen for a mutant per se. She'd fallen for _him_ in general. It would make no difference to her what he looked like.

"I'm afraid that's not a question I can answer, Raphael. It's your body, it's your life. I don't have any control over that. But I'll tell you this, I'm with you no matter what you decide."

He looked down at her and gave her a half smile. "You know, when you first told me about what you were doing, I was excited. I wondered what it would be like to be a human; what I'd look like, stuff like that. I thought that if you offered it to me, I'd jump at the chance. I don't know, I still might. I just… wanted to know what you thought about it."

"It's a huge decision. You'd get a lot of backlash from the mutant community. Even worse than the abuse I get just for attempting it." She worried about him rushing into something he'd later regret. "Just make sure that whatever you do decide to do, that it's for the right reasons."

He could see her anxiety and wanted to reassure her. "Don't worry. I'll think it over before I actually make any decisions." He didn't care about what other people thought of him deciding to be human. He only cared what she thought.

Hope sighed deeply. "I'm also going to need a test subject eventually. God knows how I'm gonna work that one out. For now though, once I get more of your blood, I can see if it works under the simulations." She sat up and looked at her watch. "I've been away from the lab for over 24 hours. I really should be getting back…" She didn't want to leave him, but there was so much to be done.

"That's okay," he said, rising from the bench. "I gotta get some sleep before work. Can't go to the club with a bad hangover."

Hope almost didn't realize what he was talking about. Then the fiasco of the previous night came flooding back to her. So much had happened since then.

She reached up and gave him one last kiss. "I'll let you go. I need a coffee to get me through the day." She stroked his face with the back of her fingers and smiled. "Call me tomorrow?"

Leaning forward, he kissed her cheek and smiled. "You know I will. Can I get that cup of coffee for you? I could probably use some too. For detox," he said jestingly.

She poked his side playfully. "I never pass up a free coffee!" They walked towards the nearest coffee shop laughing like teenagers. "Now don't try and distract me, mister. You get my coffee, then we both need to go, okay?" She squeezed his arm and winked.

"Distract? Who's distracting? I would never…," he said facetiously as he pushed open the door. It chimed softly, announcing their entrance.

As they entered Hope noticed a few heads bob up to take it in turns to stare at Raphael. "I suppose I'll need to get used to this, huh?" She whispered to him, as the curious people shifted their gazes.

"They can get used to us," he said, leading her up to the counter. "Two coffees. Make 'em hot."

The barista looked nervous and fidgeted. "I'm sorry… we don't serve…mutants. It's company policy."

Hope just about lost her footing. It had been years since the mutant civil rights laws had been passed. How could this still be happening?

"You don't… wow… _'Policy'?!…_ You can't… that's…" She was at a complete loss of what to say. Now that she was on the receiving end of the speciesism, she could finally understand just how hard it was for them. And now. Now she took it personally.

She didn't want to make a scene. But her blood was boiling in her veins, and she really empathized with Raphael and his brothers.

The barista looked flustered at Hope's outburst. "I'm sorry, ma'am, but that's what I've been told. I can't take his money. If you wanted to pay for the coffee, then that would be fine."

Raph could feel the indignation rising off of Hope in waves. He took her hand. "Forget about it. I'm sure the coffee here is crap anyway."

"It's not about the coffee," she bit out through gritted teeth, tearing her hand from his. It was like all the abuse, all the shit she'd taken from her family, her neighbors, passers-by, had finally come to a head. No matter what she did, it felt like she was in the wrong. When she sympathized with mutants, her family turned on her, voiding her of a home. When she'd tried to help the mutants, she had verbal and physical abuse hurled at her.

And now, she had fallen for a guy. A normal guy, who just so happened to be a turtle. But she was finally happy. He was her missing puzzle piece. Then this girl, just nonchalantly says that she can't take his money? Because he is a mutant? Because he looks different? What kind of crap was that to pull?

She swallowed hard, trying desperately to not blurt everything in her mind out. "Who's in charge…?" She breathed out.

The little barista blanched at the question. "My manager's in the back. I'll get him for you…" She scuttled off and Raph turned to Hope.

"Listen, babe, it's not worth it. I'm fine, really."

She glared at him and snapped, "I just want to know why!" It wasn't like her to get so defensive, but she was at the end of her tether. What excuse could they possibly cook up to not serve an entire species?

The manager appeared after a minute and stepped up to them, wearing a disarming smile that was directed at Hope.

"My apologies, you must have missed the sign that says that we have the right to refuse service by the register." He waved his hand toward the door, indicating the sign. "The president of our chain has expressed the desire that we not serve mutants of any kind. We are within our rights." The smile never wavered, but it looked forced.

Hope could see that it wasn't this guy's fault. Or the barista's. They were just doing their jobs. However the rage was still bubbling up inside her and there was nowhere to release it.

How did she deal with anger before? Had she ever been this angry before?

 _Yes._

And what did she do then?

 _Run._

"I can't do this." She whispered at the manager, then turning her eyes to Raph, filled with a medley of emotions, she said to him, "I can't do this…" She pushed past the customers in the line and forced her way out of the door.

And she ran. She ran as fast and as far as she could.

Raph stared after her for a second before he darted after her. She had long legs, and a head start. After about six blocks, he caught up with her and purposefully stepped into her past. She ran into him at full force and he wrapped his arms around her, holding her close.

"Hope, please, tell me what's wrong."

She sobbed hysterically into his plastron. "I can't." She kept repeating to him, shaking her head.

There were things she hadn't told him. Things she couldn't tell him. It was all building up again and completely overwhelming her.

She didn't want to talk, so he wasn't going to force her. Something really big was upsetting her, and while he wished that she would trust him to help her, he knew that it was better for him to take a step back. "Come on, I'll take you home."

"O-okay." She croaked, nodding. That was the best place for her to be right now.

They walked in silence. She wished so badly that she could find the courage to tell him. But it was just too hard.

Raph pushed the door open and allowed Hope to enter ahead of him. She'd stopped crying by the time that they had gotten back to the lab, but her face was blotchy and her eyes swollen. He felt absolutely powerless to do anything for her and it was infuriating.

"Can I… do anything for you?" he asked awkwardly, unsure of what he should say.

Hope took a few deep breaths to compose herself. She still felt very shaky, but managed a weak smile. "I'll be okay… thanks." She sat down at her desk and fidgeted with some papers. "I just need a distraction…"

She sighed deeply and looked up at the confused looking turtle. "I'm sorry. You don't need to be burdened with my issues. You can go, if you like."

"No way. Not while you're upset like this," he said stubbornly. "If you need to work, that's great, but I'll be sitting right here." He plopped down on the metal chair by her desk. It buckled under his weight and he tumbled unceremoniously to the floor.

She gawped at him sprawled on the floor for a second, "Wow." Springing into action she knelt down next to him and looked him over. "Are you okay?!" She exclaimed, taking his hand and attempting to heave him up.

"Yeah… Yeah I'm fine," he said, his face flushing brightly. Damn his heavy shell. "But I'm still staying. Even if I have to sit on the floor."

She started to laugh, all her fears and worries suddenly forgotten. Sitting down next to him and bringing her arm around him she kissed his cheek affectionately. "I love you, Raphael." She stated firmly, her heart racing in her chest.

She loved him… That was incredible to him to believe. Yet he did. Reaching up, he brushed a few strands of hair out of her eyes and kissed her lips gently. He didn't want to get too carried away. "I love you, too," he said simply.

She swallowed at his reply, a huge weight lifted from her shoulders. Suddenly everything clicked into place, it all just felt right somehow.

She'd never been in love, true, and had nothing to compare it to. But what else could this feeling be? She looked at him, the glint in his eyes that told her she was his and he was hers, and this was it.

Their faces were already so close together so she closed the gap and brought him into a deeply passionate kiss. She kissed him with every fiber of her being, wanting to be as close to him as humanly possible.

Raph's heart raced faster as he raked his fingers through her hair and kissed her back roughly. He reveled in her taste, her smell, the look of hunger in her face. The combination was overwhelming and he could feel himself drowning in the sensation. Moving down, he kissed her neck, nipping lightly at the skin. He thought that maybe he was moving too fast, but the soft sigh that broke from her throat stilled the thought.

Waves of something she had rarely felt before lapped at her lower body. It took her a little bit surprise, but she soon sank in to it.

She was clinging tightly to his arm as their kiss continued, her nails scraping his skin. But it wasn't enough. She needed to be closer.

Moving from the side sitting position, she brought her hands to his shoulders, not breaking from the kiss for a second. She slid her body over him, so that their chests were pressed together and her legs wrapped round his shell. She deepened the kiss further, letting their tongues dance, and wound her fingers in his tail masks.

Every synapse in his brain was on overload. His hands travelled over every curve of her body, lovingly caressing every inch of her. He felt her hands on his shoulders and biceps and wished that she would trace his shell with her fingers.

She let out a gentle moan at his touch, pushing herself against him further. Bringing her hands down to his neck, she delicately stroked it. Pausing for breath, she looked into his eyes and smiled. "This… um.. feels really good." She panted.

"Yeah…" He was so wired that he could hardly put together a coherent sentence. "If… this is too fast… we can stop…" He didn't want to make her uncomfortable, but selfishly wanted to keep going.

A seductive smirk spread across her face as an answer. She slowly, but purposely, let her finger tips flit across his shoulders and onto the join in his shell. Keeping her eyes locked on his, she brought them round to the back of his shell. Now she knew how this action made him feel, she felt obliged to try it out in the correct situation. Her gaze never wavered; she wanted to see his expression when she let her fingers waltz across his shell designs.

Raph's eyes rolled back in his head as waves of ecstasy coursed through his entire body. He released a low churr deep in his throat, mixed with an unrestrained moan. He nuzzled the skin behind her ear as his hands reached up instinctively to her chest, rubbing the buds of her breasts gently in circular motions.

This made Hope go wild with pleasure. She'd never been touched like this before and didn't know how to react. She wanted to think about the whole situation logically, but her brain had completely switched off.

She opened her mouth and let the moans of pleasure escape. Her hips rocked gently against his crotch while her hands kept the brushing motions on his shell going.

His hands now had a mind of their own. Pleasuring her was their number one priority. He grabbed the hem of her shirt and pulled it over her head, temporarily stopping her ministrations to his shell. The bra was gone in an instant, and he stared at her naked torso for a long moment. She really was beautiful. Ducking down, he lavished her breasts with attention, alternately pressing gentle kisses and hot laps with his tongue against the skin.

He was so attentive, it was almost mesmerizing. As this was her very first sexual experience she had it in mind to let him take control. And he sure knew what he was doing.

"Oh Raph…" She breathed, begging him for more.

He heard the earnest pleading in her voice and was more than ready to act on it. Her legs were still wrapped around his shell, so he had no problem carrying her to the mattress in the back room. He lay her down and traced a line of kisses down her body. He unbuttoned her trousers and pulled them down a few inches, sending her a clear message. As she kicked them completely off, he saw she was wearing a black, lacy set of underwear.

He slid the underwear seamlessly down her legs and threw them away. Nuzzling the sensitive skin of her inner thigh, he could smell the intensity of her desire.

Her breathing became shallow and labored as she watched him from above. The sensation of his skin in such a delicate area was making her head spin. The anticipation of wanting him so badly started to gnaw at her, and she lifted his chin with her finger to take one last look at him before he delved down and tainted her innocence.

Raph met her eyes, hazy and filled with lust, for a brief moment before burying his face into her depths. His tongue worked tirelessly, eliciting cries and moans of intense pleasure from Hope. The heady combination of the sight of her sweat sheened body, her potent scent, and the sweet taste of her was enough to nearly send him over the edge.

Her legs twitched uncontrollably every time his rough tongue flicked over her bud. She covered her head with her hands, her mouth still visible, hanging wide open. She couldn't take it much longer, feeling a mound of pleasure slowly forming inside. But she knew she didn't want him to stop. Her hips gently lifted to him, to indicate her building pleasure.

He could tell that she was close, her cries becoming increasingly more intense. He stopped the gentle suction that he had been using on her clit, moving back up over her body. Barely hearing her protests, he allowed his tail to extend to its full length. Raph gently parted her legs, not wanting to hurt her, and entered her with a husky moan.

She cried out with a mixture of pleasure and intense pain. It was possibly the most confusing feeling in the world. She held tight into his hips, not letting him fully penetrate her. Needing control of this moment, her arms slowly rocked him back and forth, getting deeper each time. The concentration on her face showed, but she held her breath in order stop herself screaming the building down.

He paced himself slowly at first, but his control slipped and he began to thrust gradually faster. She felt like heaven around him. He could see that she was holding back, so he leaned down to her, deepening the penetration even more.

"Come on, baby. Scream for me." His movements became more erratic as he felt his completion approaching.

She shoved her fist in her mouth, biting down hard on the skin. Closing her eyes tightly, a few stray tears leaked out. The sensation was just too much and she flung her head back letting out a conflicted cry, unknown to him if it was good or bad.

Her whole body started to convulse and her walls tightened around him, pulsating rhythmically. She felt exhausted, but looking up at his smug face, she knew he wasn't done.

Now that she had exploded around him, it was her turn for fun. She brought her legs up, wrapping around his shell, angling her hips so that he was now fully in her.

The increased pressure of being sheathed combined with the pulsating of her orgasm cause Raph to completely give in to his ecstasy. With one more hard thrust, he came inside of her, quaking violently with a triumphant shout. Completely spent, he slid out of her and rolled to the side to that he wouldn't crush her. She lay there, panting heavily, her eyes bright and her skin flushed pink. Her hair was tangled and thrown out in a wide fan, but Raph was sure she had never looked more radiant than she did now.

"Worth… the wait…" She panted, a wide smile spread across her flushed face. She was absolutely glowing with happiness. She turned on her side, feeling a slight pain in her nether region, and looked him up and down. Suddenly she felt the uncontrollable urge to laugh. It started off as a low chuckle, but soon she was crying with hysterical laughter. It was if the ecstatic feelings were bursting out of her.

If not for the fact that he'd just had sex and was still high off the sensations, he would have been angry that she was laughing. Turning toward her, he brushed her hair off of her face. "What's so funny?"

She only shook her head and laughed harder. "I-don't… I-can't… I'm just- so… happy!" She finally managed to spit out between convulsions.

Taking her in his arms, Raph kissed her temple gently. He could help but smile with her. Truth be told, this was the happiest he had been in a really long time too.

She fit perfectly tucked into his plastron as they lay on the mattress. He nuzzled her hair as he murmured into her ear.

"God, you're amazing."

She wiped her eyes and turned to look at him, still unable to remove her smile. "Well… you're not so bad… yourself."


	8. Chapter 8

It was then she started to feel an uncomfortable sensation between her legs. Thinking hard about the situation, it dawned on her what was happening.

"Uh, Raph. I'm going to ruin this wonderful moment here…" She muttered, her face twisting into annoyance. "I need… to go… uh… get cleaned up." She gestured towards her naked body, the lower half of which was tainted with a mix of his fluids and her blood.

His eyes widened at the sight of her blood. "Oh God, I hurt you… Hope, I'm sorry! Let me help you." He sat up, ready to do whatever she needed.

She brought her hand to her forehead and chuckled softly. "You didn't hurt me, you nut. You took my virginity… This… is normal!" It was hard not to laugh at his deeply concerned expression. He cared so much, and it flattered her. She rose, wrapping the stained sheet around her. "I'm going for a shower. Okay?"

"Can I join you?" He asked slyly with a little wink. Damn, even just wrapped in a stained sheet, she looked incredible.

"Sure. It makes sense I suppose. A turtle in water…" She stuck out her tongue, dropped the sheet and ran to her makeshift shower cubicle, beckoning him to chase her.

Grinning evilly, he sprung from the mattress and was behind her in an instant. He ran his hands over her body and kissed her neck, leaving red marks in his wake.

"Easy Tiger!" She teased, and turned into him. There wasn't much room in the tiny cubicle and her shower wasn't more than a trickle of water.

She took the bar of soap and rubbed it on a small pink sponge. She briskly cleaned herself up. Feeling satisfied she raised her eyebrow at him. "Turn around." She commanded, and when he did, she started to gently rub the sponge over his shell, dampening it.

The warm water felt really nice on his shell and he released a low churr in his throat. "Did I ever tell you how good it feels when you do that?" He asked as she lathered up the surface of his shell with light circular motions.

"Once. But you were very drunk…" She jested, reminding him of the previous evening. So much had happened since then. It came as a shock to her that only a few hours ago they had shared their first kiss.

Raph flushed to his eye ridges at her words. He didn't remember any of that, just going to the bar and waking up in his bed that morning. "Did… I say anything else? Last night?" he asked tentatively.

Hope stifled a giggle. "Nothing coherent, I'm afraid." She thought for a moment and stopped scrubbing his shell. Turning him around to face her, she looked into his eyes. "Look. I want to apologize for running out of the cafe earlier. That wasn't cool."

"No, it's okay," he reassured her gently. He leaned forward and kissed her forehead. "Why _did_ you run? That manager was a jerk but he didn't threaten you or anything…"

Hope opened her mouth to reply, but was met with loud banging on the warehouse door. Frowning, she jumped out the shower and wrapped herself with a towel. "It's probably just the neighbors. I'll get rid of them." She told him.

Forcing open the door just enough to peek out, she scanned the area. Two figures stood to her right, stern looks on their faces. Hope gasped and flung the door fully open.

"Mom? Dad? What are you-"

She was promptly cut off by her father. He was tall and angular, his short pointed nose turned up at her. "You've been _seen_. With one of _them_." The disgust sounded in his voice at the pronunciation of the word "them" and it made Hope's skin crawl.

Her mother, a short stout woman with an equally disdainful look on her round face piped up. "Is it here?"

Hope couldn't believe what she was hearing. "Get out of here. I've already said everything I wanted to you, years ago," she spat angrily.

Raph heard the angry voices as he was toweling himself off. Thinking that she was being hassled by those 'neighbors', he stormed toward the lab door. "Get the fuck out of here if you know what's good for ya!"

He was surprised to see a middle aged man and woman standing there and not three mutant bullies. The man had Hope's blue eyes and the woman her long blonde hair. _Oh shit…_ This was Hope's family.

Hope pushed him back. "No! Don't!" She yelled, horror filling her eyes.

Her parents scoffed. "It's disgusting. And I might have known. Violent too," her father commented, his mouth curving downwards with disgust. Her mother nodded in agreement.

"We are ashamed of you, Hope. I thought you might have known better. Letting this freak into your… place of work." It was obvious that they didn't approve of her living conditions.

"Don't even start! I don't have to explain myself you either of you," she yelped, still holding Raph back, her hand on his plastron.

"You ignorant child!" Her mother screeched. "We've come to take you home. Away from that… _thing_."

Red clouded his vision before he knew what was happening. He knew that he needed to keep his cool, to think things through, but the way these people looked at him, the way they looked down their noses at Hope made his blood boil.

"She doesn't have to listen to you," he seethed, "Hope can decide what's best for herself, and you can shove your elitist, speciesist opinions up your pompous asses!"

Hope's father shook his head and chortled, not phased in the slightest. "Just like Haden."

Hope saw red. She launched herself at her father, kicking and screaming. " _HOW DARE YOU BRING THAT UP! HOW DARE YOU SAY HIS NAME!_ "

Raph was taken aback by Hope's sudden violent outburst. Flashbacks of the incident that sent him to jail appeared behind his eyes and spurred him into action. He grabbed her arm and pulled her back.

"Hope! Back off! This isn't worth it!"

She was still in a frenzy, her eyes wild with pain and fury. She whirled around and struck him across the face, her nails clawing the skin on his cheek.

Suddenly everything started playing out in slow motion. She saw his blood spray from his cheek and looked down at her hand. This wasn't real. It couldn't be happening.

" _GET AWAY FROM ME! GET AWAY FROM US!_ " She bellowed at her parents.

They shook their heads and sighed. "Just like Haden," her mother repeated and tutted. They turned to walk away.

Hope's eyes overflowed with water, and she hysterically rambled her apologies at Raph, completely incoherent.

He ignored the stinging in his cheek from the blow and pulled her into himself. He hugged her tightly, wanting to take all the pain away, but knowing that he couldn't.

"It's okay, Hope. I gotcha," he murmured softly, rubbing her back gently. Looking up, he saw the towel that she had draped around herself laying in a forgotten heap nearby. He hadn't even noticed that it had fallen and apparently, neither had she.

"Come on, let's get inside. Think we've had enough excitement for one day." He directed her gently inside, pulling the door closed behind him.

She went limp in his arms, unable to hold herself up any more. Memories were clogging up her brain and she just couldn't think straight.

Raph led her into the kitchenette and sat her in a wooden chair by the table. He reached into the fridge and pulled out a carton of orange juice and poured a generous account into a plastic cup. Kneeling down in front of her, he pushed the cup into her hands.

"Drink this. It might help. I'm going to get you some clothes, okay?"

She nodded dully and Raph went to the back room to get her a clean set of clothes. He returned to the kitchen to see her staring blankly at the wall.

"Hope? Baby, talk to me. Please."

She sipped at the cup, eyes dead. Where would she even begin? Her voice had disappeared and she swayed slightly in the chair, feeling utterly numb. She'd managed to block those memories out for such a long time. But now… it was time to talk.

"My brother. He was my twin," she stated firmly.

Raph nodded. He had suspected that Hayden might be the name of Hope's brother by the way she had reacted when it was mentioned.

"He _was_? I thought that your brother was alive."

"They- they, locked him in our basement when he mutated. He was really violent." Her voice started to crack and she took a shaky breath. She swallowed hard and composed herself. "They couldn't control him. No one knew that mutants existed at that point. I wanted to help him. I wanted to make a serum to control his anger. And I did. But it was too late." She hung her head and began to sob gently. Then she uttered the words she never thought she would, "They killed him, Raph. They murdered my twin."

He felt sick listening to her story. It repulsed him, but it didn't surprise him.

There were plenty of people who had threatened, hurt and killed mutants had never been brought to justice. Even the group of people who had ganged up on and pistol whipped his brother hadn't even seen the inside of a cop car.

"So you confronted them about it and they threw you out?"

"I told them it was… murder, but they… wouldn't listen… to me. They made me… chose. Him or… them. Even though he was gone… I couldn't abandon him. They told me I was no longer… welcome. Called me… mutant loving scum. I haven't seen them since." She looked pained. "I don't know why they tried to take me home, though."

"I guess they figured that having you back in their house was better than you being with me," he said grimly. Taking both of her hands in his, he squeezed them reassuringly.

"They won't take you anywhere you don't want to go. Not while I'm around." He pressed the tops of her knuckles to his lips. He wasn't sure if she was afraid that they would take her away, but he would do anything to protect her from them. Even if it cost him his life or his freedom.

"What did I do to deserve you?" Hope smiled through her tears. She trusted him completely and he was everything to her. She let her head droop down and wrung her hands compulsively.

"You agreed to get a beer with me," he said with a cheeky little grin. He brushed the tears from her cheeks, somewhat conscious of the slight sting of the scratches on his face.

"I'm glad I did." She gave him a weak smile and gently touched his cheek. "I hurt you. I'm so sorry. Let me get some antiseptic!" She jumped up and dashed to a cupboard. "Here." She threw over one of her sweet-like concoctions. "Remember? To stop the pain?"

"Thanks," Raph replied, popping the orange treat into his mouth. He watched as she pulled a bunch of first aid materials out of the cupboard. It was funny that she was so comfortable around him that she was running around her home without any clothes. He wondered if she even noticed.

"Here." She pressed a bandage to his face and taped it on. "That should do." She checked him over, but couldn't understand why he kept squinting at her in a strange manner. Then it clicked. "Wow. I'm totally naked." She stated and darted to her bedroom area to grab a dressing gown.

He grinned as she hurried away. She returned a minute later, wrapped up in a blue robe that hung down to her shins. Raph stood and walked over to her. "Are you still wanting to work today?"

"Oh you have no idea. I have so much to do. Can I take your sample now? Then I'm afraid I'll have to kick you out." She grinned cheekily at him, showing that she wasn't being mean. The shock of her parents turning up on her doorstep was still lingering in her mind, but there really was a lot of work to do, and she'd put it off for far too long.

"Yeah, you can take the sample. Sure you're gonna be okay?" He asked as he settled down in the chair. Part of him didn't want to leave her alone, but he knew that if he stayed, she wouldn't get any of her stuff done. And he knew how much she wanted to finish her work.

She dashed about her lab, picking up papers and test tubes and piling them on her desk. "I'll be fine. It'll take my mind off of… things… Anyway, I'm so close. Oh! I almost forgot. I need to ask you a small favor, but you can say 'no' if it's too much for you." She picked up the needle and briskly poked it into his arm, filling the vial with the deep red liquid.

"Name it, babe. Can't be any worse than giving away a few liters of blood."

He couldn't guess what she might want. Well, he could try, but the odds of getting the right answer were slim. He didn't have the same kind of smarts as she did.

Hope hesitated while filling a second tube of blood. This time she wasn't taking any chances, she needed enough to keep her going for a while, and after all, her theory was within a stone's throw from becoming a reality.

"Well. If… when… I get this to work… I'll need something to test it on. I mean, I've got plenty mutagen to experiment with, but what I really need is… well… a volunteer." She scratched her head and sucked her teeth. "Ideally I'd need someone who wasn't a human before they mutated. Retromutagen works well on the human-mutant strand of the genes because it just deletes the mutant gene, but it becomes moot on a mutant-human, because they'd just revert back to the species they were before they mutated." Half of what she was saying wasn't even directed at Raph; once she got going, it was hard to stop her. "So in order for me to get this to work for a human-human based scale, I'd need to… test it on a mutant-human, like you, but not you, exactly, but someone like you…. What I'm asking is… can you find me someone like that?"

It was the most roundabout way of asking a favor, but Hope needed him to understand why she needed this, before blurting something out and having to explain later.

Raph frowned as he considered her request. He knew of several of these mutant-humans, as Hope called them, besides himself and his brothers. But he wasn't sure if any of them would want to put themselves through that. He wasn't even sure he wanted to take that kind of chance. "If it doesn't work, what will happen to your test subject? Are there any… side effects to the stuff?"

She shrugged, placing the tubes in a rack. "I won't know until I test it on purposefully mutated matter. This is a few weeks away, mind you. I don't even know if it will work yet. I just like to be prepared." She smiled at him and hovered over. Bringing their foreheads together, she sighed. "I never believed I could ever fall in love with anyone. Thank you." She expressed without warning.

He exhaled a soft chuckle at her sudden expression. "My pleasure," he said, snaking his arms around her waist and pulling her down into his lap.

"I've never really loved anyone like this either, so I really am glad that I met you." He turned her face toward him and kissed her tenderly.

Hope slapped his arm playfully. "No more distractions!" She said firmly, with a hint of jest. Grabbing him by the wrists, she used all her weight to bring him to his feet. "You need to go. Say hello to your brothers. I love you. Call me tomorrow." She started pushing him towards the door, still laughing slightly.

"All right, all right! I'm starting to wonder which one of is really the bouncer here." Raph stepped outside and turned back to her. "Good luck, and love you too." She smiled and shut the door solidly. He stepped out on the street and looked around.

Today had been one of the best, and craziest, days he'd ever had. But now he needed to go home and take a couple of aspirin before going to work. There wasn't time for a nap, but the hangover had run its course and he felt almost as good as new.

Hope did a little happy dance around the lab. She sure had been through the full spectrum of emotions in the last 24 hours. But not it was serious work time.

She changed briskly into her overalls and lab coat, and set about testing her samples. It took hours of waiting and checking, but eventually she hit a breakthrough.

Staring wildly through the microscope, Hope watched as the minute cells fused with her serum and effectively removed the mutant gene. She stepped back in shock. "I did it. I actually did it!" She punched the air and fell back into her chair, exhausted.

"You need to go to sleep." Hope told herself out loud while working on her third batch of serum. "Just a little longer." She replied, sounding like a mad scientist.

The next step was to test it all over again, to make sure that her calculations were correct. However it was getting so late that her eye lids were failing her.

* * *

Raph fell into bed at five in the morning, exhausted from the full day that lay behind him. All he wanted to do was sleep, and he felt himself fading fast. Just as he felt sleep beginning to pull him into the void, his T-Phone buzzed. He groaned and covered his head with his pillow. _No… Not now… Can't a guy get a few hours of sleep around here?_ He decided to ignore the call. Whatever it was, it could wait.

The phone buzzed again. Six missed calls. Raph threw the pillow down, snatched up the phone and hit the accept call button. "This better be fuckin' important," he growled ungraciously.

"Raph?"

It took a moment for him to recognize April's tearful voice on the phone.

"April? What's wrong?"

"It's Donnie… He… Oh, God…" She started sobbing again. Raph's blood ran cold in his veins.

"What happened?" He was fully awake now.

"He's in the hospital. He got hit by a car… Hit and run… They don't know if he's going to make it."


	9. Chapter 9

Scraps of paper were stuck to Hope's cheek when she awoke in the late morning. Wiping the drool stained sheet from her face and focusing her eyes, Hope saw that she'd passed out at her desk, half way through her work.

Groggily getting to her feet, and bypassing any form of normality, she scraped her hair back into a band and groaned.

"Now where was I?" She pondered, trying to make some organization out of her clutter.

The day passed slowly, but Hope was finally getting somewhere. Piling her specimens of frogs up on the workbench, she injected them all with a small amount of mutagen. It began to take hold as the dead forms of the frogs twisted into grotesque human like creatures.

She was nervous, this was it, to see what would happen when she added her serum to them.

Adding a couple of drops to the first mutant she stepped back and waited. Would it take long? Would it be instantaneous like with the mutagen and its retro counterpart?

The human-frog began to convulse on the bench and slowly, the frog features became greyer until all that was left was an odd, small version of a human being.

"Oh my god…" Hope remarked. "It worked. It works…" Remaining in shock, she pulled out her cell phone. Still nothing from Raph. Her heart sunk a little, but she brought up his number and waited for it to ring.

She was met with his gruff voice telling her to leave a message. That was weird, he never usually had his phone off.

* * *

Raph filled another two cups of coffee from the pot in the waiting room lounge. He felt absolutely dead on his feet, but he needed to be here with his family right now. Donnie needed him to be here.

He pushed one of the styrofoam cups into April's trembling hands and sat down on the opposite side of her.

"Donnie wouldn't just walk into traffic!" Mikey protested suddenly from his seat nearby. He looked angry and confused. "This doesn't feel right, dudes!"

"Of course it doesn't, Mikey, but we need to focus on being here for Donnie." Leo said quietly. His face was pale and he seemed to just be in anguished state of shock. "I can't believe that it took them so long to call us. He could have died and none of us would have known."

April began to sob and Raph draped his arm around her. He was so tired and scared that his brain was in a complete whirl. It was a waiting game at this point, and Raph was praying that Donnie was winning. He had to…

* * *

Late that evening, a middle aged doctor ushered them all into a small consultation room with a gentle smile. When they all were seated comfortably, he sat between Leo and Mikey.

"Donatello is resting now. We relieved the pressure from the swelling on his brain, but there is probably still some damage, but we won't know for sure until we run some tests."

"But he's gonna live, right Doc?" Mikey asked timidly.

"We believe so. We're keeping him heavily medicated, but we won't know the real extent of his injuries for a while."

"Can we see him?" Leo asked. The doctor shook his head apologetically.

"I want to keep him quiet until tomorrow. I will send someone to you when you can go in to see him." He shook Leo's and April's hands before leaving the room.

"Raph, take April home. Neither of you have slept in over a day," Leo instructed. Raph turned on him with a snarl.

"Go fuck yourself. I ain't going anywhere."

April grabbed his arm, dangerously close to tears.

"Raph. Please. Neither of us can help Donnie if we're exhausted."

Raph dropped his gaze and nodded. He felt dead on his feet, and he was sure that if he didn't get some sleep soon, he was going to hit someone. And April was right. That wouldn't help anyone.

"Okay. Let's get you home."

They climbed into a cab and Raph pulled out his phone. He couldn't believe that he'd turned it off. There were eight missed calls from Hope. He hit the redial button, hoping that she wasn't already asleep herself.

* * *

The fourth frog slowly dissolved into its human form and Hope grinned to herself. There was no doubt about it; her serum worked. The next stage was to find a suitable test subject. She hoped Raph would be able to find someone willing to help her out.

Her phone started vibrating on her desk and she almost toppled over reaching for it.

"Raph?!" She exclaimed as she answered. She'd been trying to get hold of him all evening. "Is everything alright?" She asked when all that could be heard was his heavy breathing.

He was having a hard time getting his voice to work right. He closed his eyes, relieved to hear her voice after this hellish day of waiting.

"Hope?" he finally managed after a long moment. "I… I need to see you. Please."

Hope's blood turned icy in her veins. This wasn't her Raph. Something had happened.

"What's wrong…?" She asked cautiously. All sorts of scenarios stared playing through her head. But she refused to settle on one until she knew the truth. "Raph…?"

"It's Donnie… He got hurt last night in a car accident. I just… I need to see ya."

The cab pulled up to April's apartment and they climbed out. April pantomimed that she was alright going in unescorted and he could go. He nodded his thanks and headed up the sidewalk. Her place wasn't far.

He staggered a little over his own feet. He hadn't slept in almost 30 hours, and he was exhausted. He wanted to just curl up right there in the street, but willed himself to keep going.

Hope went into autopilot before she could think about what she was doing. A string of emotions knotted tightly in her stomach. She shrugged off her lab coat, replaced it with her yellow jacket and threw on some shoes. She was ready to go wherever he needed.

"Where are you?" She said firmly, not even expressing any formalities of the norm when someone was in distress. Her mind was on one single thing. Making sure that he was alright.

"A couple of blocks from from your place. On Houston." He rubbed at his itchy eyes and groaned softly. His feet felt like they were encased in lead as he trudged slowly toward her lab.

* * *

She was pacing back and forth outside her lab. Completely restless, waiting for him to turn up, at a loss of how to react.

She was concerned for Donatello and the others, of course she was, but her number one agenda was Raph.

Running her hands through her hair, she looked up to the sky, which was threatening to open. She bit her lip and tried to calm herself down. She needed to be strong for him.

Raph felt the first drops of rain flick against his skin as he turned down her street. They grew in frequency and within two minutes, it had turned into a downpour. In the distance, he could see a figure in a yellow jacket pacing in front of the door to Hope's lab.

He broke into a wild sprint, tripped over his own feet, and knocked over a set of trash cans against the alley wall. He was soaked but his attention was solely on Hope. When he reached her, he threw his arms around her and hugged her tightly.

Hope had never been needed like this before. So when he clung onto her, she felt a sudden sense of responsibility for him.

Guiding the broken turtle inside, she pulled up a chair and sat him down. Kneeling down in front on him, she took his damp hands and kissed his knuckles.

"What happened?" She asked, concern crossing over her face.

Raph closed his eyes, weariness seeping into his bones as he settled in the chair.

"Donnie… was studying at the library on campus, and… he walked toward the lair when they closed. Someone… hit him with their car when he was… crossing the street. They… they didn't even stop." He stopped for a moment and leaned forward as he tried to keep himself together.

"He hit his head… They… He was in s-surgery f-for hours and… they th-think his brain…" He couldn't get any farther. The thought that Donnie might be permanently damaged scared the shit out of him. Covering his face with his hand, he sobbed heavily, completely forgetting his dignity.

Hope's eyes quickly scanned her lab for possible solutions to his pain. There was nothing. She couldn't do anything and it almost broke her.

"I-I don't have anything to make you feel better! I'm sorry, there's nothing… nothing I can do!" She stressed, unaware that she was the thing that he needed right now.

He was so big, there was no way she could hold all of him. Her breathing quickened as she started to panic. She needed to comfort him. She lifted his head and brought his arms out to his sides. Nesting into the space they left, she innocently straddled him, enveloping him with her body.

Raph didn't have the presence of mind to be embarrassed that he was crying without restraint and was being comforted by his girlfriend. He could only lean his head against her chest and attempt to pull himself together.

"Sorry… I'm just… I haven't slept since yesterday. This whole thing's fucked up…"

They stayed like that for a little while, Raph sobbing until his eyes dried out. Hope knew that the only way that he could sleep was to tire himself out.

Now void of any more tears, Hope saw that he had started to drift to sleep. "Come on," she whispered, guiding him to her makeshift bed. She curled up next to him, her head on his plastron, listening to the steady beat of his heart and feeling the rise and fall of his chest.

"I'm… gonna find the bastard… who was driving that car…," he said drowsily as his eyes drifted closed. Hope's warmth helped chase away the chill and he felt himself start to drift off to sleep. "I gotta… find…" And darkness seeped into his vision.

His words made Hope wonder if he could be serious. She lay next to him, holding him protectively, remembering his reactions to when he'd accidentally hurt Michelangelo at their training session. It was true, he had trouble controlling his anger, an anger that had put him in prison for three years. She dreaded to think what he might do if he caught the person who had knocked over Donatello.

She made a decision then to never let that happen. She'd always keep him calm, reason with him if necessary, in order to keep his rash actions at bay.

Soon she too began to drift off, never letting go of her love.

* * *

 _Raph stood in an alley, holding the kid up by his shirt collar. His knuckles were bloody, just like the kid's face. This all seemed really familiar to him, but he couldn't place it for a moment. All he could think was that this kid needed to pay for threatening his family. He wouldn't let this punk get away with it._

 _A feminine voice plead with him in the background, begging him to let him go. He ignored her, giving himself in to his rage. He raised his fist again, ready to deliver the final blow, but what he saw stopped him cold._

 _The bloody face had morphed into Donnie's face, his eyes swollen nearly shut._

 _"Why Raph? Why are you doing this?"_

 _"I'm sorry! I didn't…" He dropped Donnie and backed against the wall. All of a sudden, a car's headlights illuminated the alley, moving too fast toward them. "Donnie! Look out!" He cried. He tried to move, but his feet were stuck where he was._

 _Donnie turned toward the car but it was too late._

 _"No!"_

* * *

Raph sat bolt upright on the mattress, covered in a cold sweat.

Hope was awoken by Raph's sudden cry. Her eyes flung open and she was met with the sight of his wide eyes, filled with terror.

Realizing what had happened, she took his head in her arms and soothed him like a child.

"Shh, it's okay, it was just a nightmare." She whispered, placing gentle kisses on his cheek. "I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you."

As he panted heavily, he relaxed under her gentle touch. He briefly found it ironic that the guy who made it a mission to protect the ones he loved was being protected from himself by a beautiful blonde girl. He dozed once more, thankful that he didn't have to keep up his pretense of strength anymore. He knew she would be there to catch him.

Once she knew he was in a deep sleep state, Hope uncurled herself from him and set about clearing up the mess from her earlier work. She had a small furnace in the back of the lab and she disposed of the human matter left over from her experiments. Her mind kept wandering to Donatello, wondering if there was anything she could do for him.

Bottling up the serum, she turned to look at Raph. At least he was at peace for now. When he woke, there would be a lot to do.

* * *

Raph awoke slowly and for a moment, he wasn't sure where he was. He looked around at his surroundings uncertainly and it came back to him. He propped himself up on his elbows and watched as Hope scrubbed at a glass beaker underneath a running sink tap.

"Hey," he said gruffly, rubbing at his eyes.

"Oh! You're awake!" She set the beaker down and went to him. "How are you?" it was a simple question, but it was filled with so much more. She knew how hard this situation was going to be on him and she had vowed to be there for him. Her eyes shone with concern for his wellbeing, physically and mentally.

"I'm doin' better now. How long was I out?" He stood up and came over to her. Kissing her cheek, he hugged her closely from behind. He was so mentally tired, he couldn't focus on anything more than what was happening at this moment.

"Just a few hours. I suppose you'll be wanting to get back to the hospital now? Here-" she passed him two slices of buttered toast, "-It's not much, but you'll need your strength."

She didn't know Donatello well, but from the time they did spend together, albeit far from the ideal getting-to-know-you situation, she found him to be welcoming and very intelligent. She'd wanted to get to know him better, hear his opinions, discuss her research, but now, she didn't even know if he'd live.

Her heart went out to his fiancée; she must be terrified. Her eyes darted back over to Raph. She didn't want to intrude on his family, but she knew that for some reason, she needed to see Donnie.

He took the toast and shoved the pieces into his mouth without preamble. "Thanks babe," he said, his mouth full of food. "Yeah, I should get back soon. They probably won't let us see him for a while, but I want to be there as soon as they let us in."

She nodded in agreement and hesitated. "Do you… do you want… need me there?" She wasn't sure if she was over stepping her boundaries by asking, but she was the first person he came to see when he was in distress. She leaned against the worktop and studied his face as he wiped the breadcrumbs from his lip.

He smiled, relieved that he didn't have to ask. "I'd like to have you there. I'm sure April would like having another girl around too."

"Come on, let's go." She glanced over at the vials of serum. Would it be the completely wrong moment to tell him her news? "Raph… I, um… I perfected the serum. It works." She mumbled just loud enough for him to hear. It felt bittersweet that she wanted to be excited, but couldn't.

He stared at her for a second, then picked her up and spun her around triumphantly. "That's amazing! I knew you could do it!" He kissed her lips passionately, rewarding her genius. "Now you _have_ to see Donnie. I know he will want to hear all about it." Raph wasn't sure that he would even be awake to listen, but sciency stuff might be enough to help his spirit or something. It was times like this when he really missed Splinter.

His reaction was perfect. She knew then that this relationship would work beyond what they already had. His selflessness projected out of him and she fully appreciated it.

* * *

They caught a cab to the hospital. Hope still felt like she was intruding on their family time, but Raph had reassured her that she was always welcome.

Leo and Mikey both looked up as Raph and Hope stepped into the waiting room. Mikey's round face lit up and he swallowed her in a huge hug. Raph looked annoyed for a split second before be pulled away.

"It's great to see ya!" Mikey said with a sad smile. Leo rose from his seat as well to greet her.

It was still odd for her to be greeted so warmly by someone she'd only met one time, however it was welcomed. Hope returned his smile.

"It's great to see you too, Mikey." She looked to Leo and placed her hand on his shoulder for comfort. "Any news?" She asked, looking into his worn indigo eyes.

"He's not awake yet," Leo replied sadly. "Some policemen came to tell us more about the accident, though. They… They think the driver swerved into him."

"The guy hit Donnie on _purpose_?" Raph asked dangerously, his voice full of venom. Leo nodded.

"That's what they think. They asked if we knew anyone who drove a red compact, but I don't know anyone."

Hope gasped and covered her mouth with her hand. "That's… awful…" She mumbled from behind it. Looking to Raph and seeing his eyes glaze over with fury, she went to him and took his hand. She squeezed it gently to let him know that she was there.

April appeared at the door, holding a bag filled with sandwiches in her hand. Her eyes fell on Hope, looked curiously at Raph, then smiled.

"Hello. I'm April O'Neil. You must be Hope," she said as she handed the bag to Mikey before offering her hand to Hope. "Donnie said you were a geneticist."

"H-hi." Hope replied nervously and took her hand. This girl was stunning. Her fiery hair brushed her shoulders, baby blue eyes filled with pain. "Yeah, I am." She couldn't imagine what April was going through at this time and wished she could think of something to say to console her.

April took Hope gently by the arm and drew her to the side to speak with her privately. "I'm glad you came back with Raph. He's been taking this worse than anyone, even me. Maybe you being near him will help him keep his head."

"Ms. O'Neil?"

All heads turned toward the doctor who had seen them before. "Yes?" April said, her heart in her throat.

"You can come see him now. He's still comatose, but I think you and his family can go in."

Hope watched as the turtles and April followed the doctor. She hung back, unsure of whether or not she was regarded as part of their family. After all, she'd only known them a couple of weeks.

They followed the doctor into the ICU and Leo thanked the doctor as he indicated the right room. April's breath caught in her throat at the sight of Donnie's bruised and broken body on the table. Most of his body was covered by white bandages and head was swaddled with thick padding. His breathing was shallow and his gapped teeth showed between his parted lips.

"Donnie…," she said brokenly as she sat in a chair next to his bed. Mikey looked like he was going to be sick, and Raph was livid with rage. He was growling like a feral wolf as he stared at Donnie. Whoever did this was going to pay…

"Raph?"

His head snapped around and he locked eyes with his older brother.

"Hope's still in the waiting room."

He closed his eyes, trying to get himself under control. Leo was right. If he lost his temper here, it wouldn't be helping Donnie at all. Without another word, he turned on his heel and stalked back toward the waiting room.

* * *

The waiting room was deserted. Hope wondered how many people had come and went here, hearing good news, or bad, about their loved ones. It was just a drive-by for people, holding their breath on the worn plastic seats, banging their fists on the temperamental coffee machine. She felt out of place here, like a mislabeled chemical on her shelf.

She swallowed hard. She knew she had to be there for Raphael and his family, but this was a private time, one she had no business delving into.

Heavy, shuffling footsteps caused her to look up. There he stood, shoulders hunched, an expression washed over his face that she couldn't quite place.

"Hi… How.. How is he?" Her tone was low, eyes brimming with concern.

He wanted to throw some tables and chairs around. Just cause some damage to release some of the pent up anger and fear broiling within him. Instead, he just clenched his fists and tried to breathe.

"Broken… He's broken and there's nothin' I can do."

She'd thought hard about what to say in this particular situation. She picked out the correct pep talk from her library of speeches in her mind and fit her face with the correct facial expression.

"Of course there's nothing you can do." Hope said firmly, watching his expression change. She continued, "This is all out of your control. I'm sorry Raphael, but I know that look. Beating someone up, or smashing things, or getting drunk… These things will do nothing to help Donatello. I know you feel like you need to unload. I get that. But you need to find a different way to do that." She stepped in to him and brushed her fingers over his hand, willing him to unclench his fist. "They need you. He… needs you."

 _I need you,_ she thought to herself, but daren't mutter the words.

He knew she was right, though he really did want to run out that door and shake down the first guy who looked at him funny. He opened his hand and allowed her to slip her fingers between his. He pulled her into an embrace, holding onto her as if his life depended on it. And maybe it did. Releasing a heavy sigh, he buried his face in her hair and lost himself in her scent. Slowly, his rage ebbed away, leaving a sense of fatigue behind.

"It's going to be okay. He's in safe hands," she whispered absent-mindedly into his ear. She'd made a promise to him that she would always keep him safe, and she planned to keep it.

She uncurled herself from his grip and stroked his cheek. "Come on… Take me to him…"

Raph nodded numbly. Taking her hand, he led her back toward the room where his family were gathered around Donnie's bed.

She knew it would be a horrible sight, but she wasn't quite prepared for the actual scene before her.

April sat next to Donatello on the bed, stroking his hand, whispering ramblings to him.

She took a deep breath and held it, unsure of what to say.

Raph squeezed her hand and hoped that he wasn't hurting her. He was glad she was here, keeping him from losing his mind.

"You've got to pull through, Donnie… You still have to help me pick out the decorations for the reception," April pleeded softly, her face streaked with tears as she stroked Donnie's swollen cheek. "I picked my dress out last week. I was freaking out because I wanted it to be perfect. I want you to see it… Please, stay with me."

Hope wanted to run. She wanted to bolt out of there and never set foot in a hospital again. The sight of Donatello's broken body, made her insides churn. He'd done nothing wrong, just been going about his business. Then some idiot with a vendetta against mutants just…

Tears spilled out of her eyes, claiming her cheeks. This wasn't fair. It was cowardice. She wanted to find whoever had done this, not to do what Raphael wanted to do, no she wasn't violent. She wanted to talk. She wanted to know _why._

She sobbed silently next to Raph, equalling the strength of his hand hold.

Raph sensed more than he saw her tears and pulled her into a comforting embrace. He wanted to find this guy more than ever and make him pay. It would have been different if it were an accident, but it was blatant attempted murder. He needed to right this somehow.

"Excuse me."

Everyone in the room jumped at the sound of a nurse who had poked her head inside the room.

"Visiting hours end in five minutes. We open again at eight tomorrow morning."

April looked rebellious for a split second before nodding. Leaning over, she planted a kiss between Donnie's eyes and stood. Silently, the family filed out of the room, leaving Donnie alone to sleep dreamlessly.

* * *

The group exited the hospital and said their goodbyes to one another. Hope and Raph didn't seem to give any indication of parting, so they started walking, hand in hand, down the street.

"What do we know about the person who hit him…?" Hope asked out of the blue. She was well aware that Raphael would be plotting all sorts of things against the driver, but she also needed justice to be served. It just wasn't good enough anymore, people not being punished for potentially breaking apart a whole family.

Her mind went back to when her brother was murdered in cold blood and her chest tightened. Her parents would never be chastised for their evil deed, so she sure as hell wanted Donnie's attacker to be.

Raph blinked in surprise. Did she know what was in his mind? She had him pegged so far, so he responded.

"Just that the bastard was driving a red compact. Nobody really got a good look. And… Nobody did much to help him when he was laying in the street."

Hope's mind started working in overdrive. There must be a way to find out who it was. She sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose; a headache was threatening to break through.

"What kind of compact? No registration? Male or female? Height? Description? Where did it happen? We could find something there?" She said aloud without taking a breath. It was her new project. Something to work on. This had to be done. If she could find out the small details, she knew she could quickly weave them into the bigger picture. A portrait of this person. This person who had to be brought down.

Raph had an idea. It was a stretch, but it might be crazy enough to work. "Do you think there's a way to find a red car that needs body work done? The cop said that there was glass everywhere, and some of the headlights were there too."

"You are a genius!" Hope exclaimed. "That's exactly what we need to do! Oh, I love you!" She jumped up on her tip toes and kissed him full on the mouth.

She calculated all the different ways that she could find out the information, but the quickest and easiest way to do that was to hack into the client databases of the nearest auto repair shops. She had basic hacking skills, but not the correct software.

"I need a computer terminal that has access to hacking software." She stated, blind to the fact that Raphael couldn't hear for train of thought before she verbalized her conclusion.

 _So she's after auto body clientèle lists… Clever girl._ Raph smiled, admiration etching his features.

"A lot of Donnie's old hacking stuff is back at the lair. He left it stored in his old lab when he moved in with April. Not sure what most of it does, but you can look through it and see if it's what you need."

"That's perfect! Let's go!" Hope replied enthusiastically, pulling at his hand. Once she had a project, that was the only thing on her mind and she needed to get started right away. They were going to avenge his brother, in any way they could.

* * *

They arrived back at the lair fifteen minutes later, just after Mikey and Leo arrived. They looked puzzled as Raph grunted a greeting then pushed open the door to Donnie's lab.

"What are you two doing?" Leo asked, one eye ridge raised in question.

"Don't worry about it," Raph retorted as he pulled the door closed behind them. The room felt dusty and unused, with random pieces of equipment sitting in piles. The computer stood on the desk, so Raph threw the switch and it sprung into life.

Hope walked around in awe. "This is amazing. I can't believe all this has been down here for years and no one knew!" She brushed the dust off of various equipment pieces as she surveyed the lab.

Snapping back to her senses she sat down at the terminal and began staring intently at the screen. Finding what she was looking for, she glanced up at Raph. "This may take a while. My hacking skills are a little rusty." She cracked her knuckles and began furiously typing on the keyboard.

Raph wandered around the lab, randomly picking up pieces of equipment or other junk that lay on tables or shelves while he waited. There used to be a lot of experiments sitting on the table, a half constructed invention on the floor, or Donnie sleeping with his head on his desk. Now there was just dust and a lot of memories.

He got tired of wandering and pulled up a chair, drawing it near Hope to watch her progress. Not much of it made sense to him, just a bunch of numbers and letters and numbers mashed together.

* * *

A whole hour had passed before Hope finally let out a squeal of excitement, pointing at the screen. "I've found three cars matching the description, but only one in the area where Donnie was hit. Look." She guided his eyes to the screen where a name and address were located.

Raph studied the name on the screen for a moment, trying to remember where he had seen that name before. His heart dropped into the pit of his stomach as everything clicked into place. The red cloud covered his vision once more and he stood up so abruptly the chair he was sitting in clattered to the ground.

"That son of a bitch! I'm not gonna let him get away with this shit again!"

"What? What's wrong? You know him?!" Hope spluttered, shocked by his reaction. She turned in the chair to face him, studying his face. It was filled with anger and hate, and she knew something was seriously wrong. When he continued to breathe heavily, ignoring her question she took his hand and looked into his eyes. "Raph? Talk to me."

He was brought back down to Earth at her touch. It didn't dissipate his anger, but caused him to focus enough to piece his thoughts together.

"That's the guy who I beat up… The one I went to prison for. Fuck…" He wanted to punch something, to scream, to make someone hurt as badly as Donnie was hurting.

Hope saw his expression turn dark and she instantly knew his thought process. "Raphael. That's not why I'm doing this. You already wasted three years of your life. I just want to talk to him. To understand what goes through his mind." She spoke slowly, to not alarm him. "In fact, it might be better if you weren't even there…" She added as an afterthought.

He whirled on her indignantly. "No! You can't just ask me to sit quietly by, Hope. He tried to kill my brother! And this isn't the first time! You can't stop me from putting this guy down…" He wasn't going to let anyone stand in his way. Not even her. He needed to pay this guy back for all the hurt he had caused.

She shot off her chair and brought herself to her full height. Granted it was only at his chest level, but she could feel her frustration surfacing. She managed to hold it in place as she carefully spoke. "Alright then. If you're that desperate to go back to prison. Fair enough." This was getting too much for her now. "I won't stand and watch you throw your life away again." She told him firmly, and turned on her heel. "It's your decision." She said quietly and exited the lab.

Mikey nearly took her off of her feet when they bumped into one another near the kitchen. He caught her and gently set her back upright.

"Oops, sorry. I…" He looked carefully into her face, then back at the lab where she had come from. _Dammit Raph…_ He thought glumly. "Did you guys have a fight?"

She repositioned her feet after the run in and smoothed down her platinum colored hair. A raspy sigh left her lips. "A fight? No." She didn't want to let the Mikey know that his brother was being… well, his brother. "It's fine. I have to go though." She gave him a friendly peck on the forehead to let him know that she was alright and swiftly departed the area.

Raph wanted to go after her, but something held him back. He didn't want to admit that she was right. If he went after this guy, he would lose everything. His family, his life… especially Hope. He didn't want that, but he couldn't let this go.

He shuffled out the door and came face to face with Mikey. He was looking uncharacteristically grim.

"Whatever happened, you need to fix it. I know what happened to Donnie is freaking us all out, but don't throw this away, dude." He turned away before Raph could say anything.


	10. Chapter 10

Raph pounded on the door of Hope's lab, hoping that she was home. The metallic door echoed back loudly, sounding like the bass drum in a marching band. She wasn't answering her phone and he was starting to get worried. He'd let his hot head get the better of him and he may have blown his chance at the best thing that had ever happened to him.

"Hope? Baby, open the door!" He leaned against the door and called again. "I know you're pissed, but…" What else could he say? He was an idiot who liked getting himself into trouble?

"I'm sorry… I'm really trying to keep it together, but this I can't. The best way I know how to fix something is to hit it. Please… Open the door."

There was no answer. There was only him and his pathetic explanations. Maybe if he called her again…

* * *

Hope was power-walking down the street. She'd memorized the name and address of Donnie's attacker and was repeating it over and over under her breath. Now, she was going to take matters into her own hands. No clue what to say, all her speeches were a jumbled mess in her mind. She'd made the decision to wing it, which was not something she was good at. But that would have to do. She was now running on the dregs of her frustration at the whole situation. It was now or never.

Jumping in a nearby cab, she blurted out the address to the driver and sat back, chanting the name, "Matthew Hollins, Matthew Hollins." She was finally going to understand what went through that lunatic's mind.

Vibrations in her pocket sent Hope into a fit of exasperation. "Leave me alone, Raph…" She muttered to herself as she bashed the red button on her phone once again. She was not going to speak to him, he'd only talk her out of it, or worse, come looking for her.

The cab pulled into the curb outside a rickety old block of flats. She briskly paid the driver and stepped out into the area. It was plain to see that it was not a nice neighborhood. Litter blew in circles around her feet, and graffiti was strewn across every surface. What little people there were around, hung in corners, their eyes not quite focused on the world around them.

Hope suddenly felt very uneasy, but her mission was still a go. She headed to the closest building and was mildly uplifted to find the correct number on the door. She pressed the buzzer and a shrill noise rang out within the apartment.

Matt paused the movie he was watching, wondering who could be bugging him so late at night. Maybe it was Sandy, reconsidering the proposition he had given her earlier that evening. Oh God, he hoped so. He jogged to the door and peeked through the peephole. Definitely not Sandy, but she was a looker, and that was enough for him.

He opened the door wide so she could get a good look at him. She was tall, fair and blonde, three things he really dug in a woman. Her tits were too small for his liking, but that didn't matter as much. If she was willing to put out, he was willing to see how far she would go.

"Well hello there," he said suavely. "What can I do for you?"

Hope took a good long look at the weedy man before her, unsure of whether this was her target or not. He stood leaning against the half rotten door frame, gawking at her in such a way it made her skin crawl. His mousey brown hair was greasy and had a stale smell to it, as if he hadn't washed in days. The odor caught in her throat and she had to cover her nose and mouth to avoid gagging.

"Matthew Hollins?" She enquired from behind her hand.

Matt's smiled faltered a little. No one called him Matthew unless they wanted money. "Yeah? What do you want?"

"I- uh, well- um." This is what happened when Hope didn't plan out her wording carefully. She started to panic. All the pent up anger was dissipating to nothing and she was left with a blubbering mess of syllables.

She could see he was growing impatient as his foot tapped on the worn carpet within his home. Scrambling in her library, she grasped at as many words and phrases as she could, throwing together a makeshift pattern of words. "Do you- own a red- corvette compact…?" Was all she managed.

 _Shit… It's a chick from the insurance company._ He should have known better than to think it was a booty call. Maybe she was bringing the check directly to him. You never know… It could happen.

"Yeah. It's in the shop though. I got in an accident the other day."

It took all of her effort not to snort in his face. _Accident? Yeah, right._

"What happened in this accident?" She asked, finally forming a full sentence. He looked nervous, and for good reason, but she had to get the truth out of him. Feeling the anger bubbling up from within again, she held her breath in wait for his reply.

He hesitated. He couldn't tell her the truth, especially if she was from the insurance company. "I… Um… Hit some trash cans in an alley. I thought it was a shortcut, but it just really messed the car up."

Hope began to laugh. Slowly at first, building up until she was slapping her knees in maniacal snorts.

That was it. The final straw. This lunatic had lied to her face while Donatello was lying in hospital, fighting for his life. She now fully understood why Raph reacted the way he did. She wanted to punch this goon square in the jaw, this very second.

"You're lying, man! You're lying right to my face!" She howled, her face bright red and ribs aching. "I know what you did!"

Matt felt all of the color drain from his face. She knew? How? He needed to get rid of her. "I don't know what you're talking about." He said obstinately, then he tried to shut the door in her face.

Instinctively wedging her boot into the doorway, Hope caught him off guard. Her uncharacteristic bout of laughter had subsided and her lips faded to a thin line. "No. I just want to talk." Her brow furrowed, leaving a stern expression upon her face.

"I've got nothin' to say to you, bitch," he sneered as he tried to force her out. She was a lot stronger than she looked and she kept her foot securely inside the door.

"I just want to know why," Hope blurted out, aware that this was not going to help matters. She didn't feel like she was in danger, exactly, but if this guy was willing to run down an innocent person just for being different, who knows what he could do to her.

"You're one of those fuckin' mutant lovers, aren't ya?" He challenged as he pushed harder. "Don't you get it? They're _freaks_! Stealing everything that humans have worked to build! So what if I took out one of them? It had no business being up here with us! Now I don't have to look at his ugly mug ever again!"

" _That's it?!_ That's why you tried to kill him?" Hope stopped pushing the door and it snagged hard on her boot, causing her to yelp out in pain.

Tried? So the freak wasn't dead? Well, even if he lived through it, he wouldn't know it was him. Ever since that other turtle had assaulted him, Matt had kept his distance from Donnie, but it still annoyed him that he had been there. He had no business being there with them. Just seeing him made Matt sick to his stomach. No one could pin this on him.

Except the girl. _She_ knew. She could call the cops, and he'd go away for a so called 'hate crime'. Unless he shut her up. He threw the door open and grabbed her arms, pulling her roughly inside.

The shock of her body being forced so violently into the apartment made Hope scream out. She intuitively jerked her limbs to break free, but her endeavor was futile.

"What the fuck are you doing?!" She yowled in a voice that had never been heard before.

"Shut up!" Matt sneered as he dragged her farther into the apartment. The neighbors knew better than to come around, even if she made a lot of noise. He kicked open the door to his bedroom and threw her onto the bed, figuring that if he was going to waste her, he might as well take her on a test run. Couldn't hurt anything.

She screeched and tried to claw at his face. _Feisty_ _little bitch…_ He struck her hard across the face, momentarily stunning her. It was enough for him to climb on top of her and pin her down, using his weight to keep her immobile. She smelled so good… He kissed her neck as he held her arms above her head. It was going to be tricky getting them both out of their pants, but this wasn't his first rodeo. He could manage it.

Her ears were buzzing from the strike. She felt like she was watching the whole scene unfold from above. It wasn't happening to her. It couldn't be. All control had been seized from her now. She screamed and kicked, but her efforts were met with his stony cold sneer. He knew what he was doing. She knew what he was doing.

Hot, fiery tears poured down her petrified face. She wanted to keep struggling, but eventually it dawned on her that this piece of work was going to do his evil deed regardless. He held both her wrists tightly with one hand and somehow managed to pull down her pants and underwear with one swift jerk from his other hand.

"Please don't do this…" She whimpered with one last pleading sob.

Matt was so close, he could almost taste it. She was so tiny that he wasn't sure if he would fit. But he would make himself fit. This was all about him, after all. He didn't really care if she was comfortable.

Suddenly, something huge and strong wrapped around his neck, cutting off his airway. He felt himself being lifted into the air and thrown against the wall. He didn't have any time to recover because the mutant was on top of him in an instant.

"You worthless piece of shit! I'm going to fucking kill you!" It screamed irately as it drove his fist into his face over and over.

Matt knew this voice, knew this face… It was the turtle. The one who had put him in the hospital after he had a little 'talk' with its brother. He couldn't believe this was happening again. The thing wrapped its large hands around his neck and started squeezing the life out of him. He struggled and tried to call out, but there was nothing he could do.

Reality seemed to be failing now. She must have blacked out for a couple of moments, her subconscious attempting to shield her from living through this nightmare.

When she opened her eyes, a horrifying scene filled them. Most of the event was taking place from behind a huge turtle shell, but it didn't take a genius to work out what he was doing. Blood sprayed across the walls as his face was pummeled over and over.

She was going to lose him. He was going to kill this bastard, and even though she now knew that he deserved every single blow, she could not have Raph go to prison again.

" _RAPHAEL!_ " She bellowed, her throat stinging from the harshness of the yell. " _STOP!_ " Somehow she'd managed to pull up her pants and scrambled to his side.

He seemed to be in a different world, eyes glazed over, only the whites visible. Hope was close enough that a spray of hot red liquid coated her face, making her gag. She needed to get through to him. Bringing her arms out slowly to take hold of his swinging arm, she just brushed his skin before he swung his powerful fist round. It smashed into her face with such force that she was thrown to the ground. Her eyes rolled back into her head. She lay there, broken and helpless.

Everything was moving in slow motion. Raph saw his fist connect with her face, saw her fall back onto the ground, saw her go limp. His heart stopped and the red haze immediately fell from his eyes.

" _Hope!_ " Forgetting about the unconscious sack of shit leaning against the wall, he pressed his fingers to her throat, desperately looking for a pulse. When he felt the steady beat of her heart under her skin, he thought he would pass out from the relief. "Baby… I'm sorry, I'm so sorry…"

"Raph! I got here as fast as- Oh my God…" He turned to see Casey standing behind him. The flashing lights of his patrol car on the street illuminated the street with vibrant red and blue light.

"Casey… He… I didn't…" Raph couldn't pull his thoughts together. He was reeling and he didn't know what to do. All he could do was hold Hope in his arms and try to make her see it was all okay. Casey leaned over and checked for a pulse on the man.

"He's not dead, Raph. I'll call this in and you call an ambulance for your girl."

Raph nodded, dazed as he grabbed his phone. He was in deep shit, but he didn't care if he went to jail again. He only cared if Hope could forgive him. God knew he would never forgive himself.

* * *

A strong smell of disinfectant caught in Hope's nostrils, jolting her awake. She was aware that she couldn't move, some sort of tubes were attached to her body in various places. A crisp white ceiling focused in her vision as she stared up, wondering where she was. Her hands were numb, but she managed to flex her fingers slightly, bringing life them. What was going on? Her mind was completely blank.

Hazy images flashed through her head, dulling her senses slightly. She blinked a couple of times and attempted to look around. Jutting her jaw downwards she caught a glimpse of orange at her side. Her broken brain registered that this was Mikey, and he was fast asleep at her side. Darting her eyes to the other side of the small room, she clocked Leo dozing in a chair to her left. Her heart beating faster, and the steady pace of beeps sounding next to her rapidly increased. It slowly started to dawn on her that she was lying in a hospital bed.

Still, nothing came back to her. What had happened? Had there been an accident? Where was Raphael? Was he hurt? She opened her mouth to ask all these questions, but all that escaped was a feeble squeak.

Leo heard her stir and looked in her direction. Hope was looking around, dazed and confused. She must be freaking out, trying to piece together what was happening. He stood and came over to her, smiling disarmingly.

"Shh, it's okay, Hope. You're safe. You're in the hospital." He gently pulled up a chair and sat next to her. Both of her eyes were blackened and her broken nose had been set and bandaged. From what Casey had told him, it all could have been a lot worse.

Safe? From what? What had happened? She delved into the deepest reaches of her labyrinth like mind and frantically searched for some sort of anchor. But nothing came. The last thing she remembered was walking out in Raph at the lair. Where was he, anyway? She needed to know.

"R-Raph…" She managed to choke out, barely a whisper.

Leo closed his eyes, silently cursing his brother for being such an idiot. "He's giving a statement at the police precinct about what happened. But he's fine. If they don't indict him, he will be here soon."

Leo's words made no sense to Hope. Why would Raphael be giving a statement? Did he have something to do with her being in hospital? Just as she started to wonder why exactly she was there, a strong throbbing sensation passed over her face. Whatever was holding the pain at bay was wearing off now and she grimaced with the feeling.

"Wh-what…? Happ-d?" She tried, willing Leo to understand what she meant.

He sighed and rubbed a hand over the top of his head. "From what Raph and Casey said, you found the guy who hit Donnie and went after him. He was going to… well, he was going to rape and kill you, Hope. Raph went after you and…"

He paused, juggling with the option of not telling her the whole truth. In the end, he decided that she deserved to know. "He lost control. You tried to snap him out of it and he hit you. Gave you a concussion and a broken nose. Our friend works in the police force, so he's been able to help, but Raph's in big trouble."

She saved Leo's explanation in her head and repeated it back, over and over, until the memory, or at least partial memory, finally fit back into place like the last puzzle piece.

Blurry, inconsistent scenes plagued her vision. She tried vigorously to set them in the correct order, beginning with after she left Raph at the lair. Her eyes were going wild, flickering in and out of focus.

Once everything was back in order, she replayed the whole scene back. It felt surreal to see what was happening; she wasn't sure if it was a real memory, or if it may have been tainted by Leo's recollection.

As Raph's fist plunged towards her face, she let out a small yelp and squeezed the hand of sleeping Mikey next to her.

"Oh my god…"

Mikey's eyes slid open and he looked around blearily. Leo was about to go look for a doctor to give her something for the pain when there was a short knock on the door.

Casey Jones stood in the doorway, still dressed in his black police uniform. He had decided a long time ago that he could bring more order to the city through working with the police instead of against them. He saw Hope and a bright smile spread across his face.

"You're awake!" He declared, striding up to the bed. He gave Mikey a friendly fist bump and a nod to Leo before standing over the bed.

"I'm Officer Jones, but since you're Raph's girl, you can call me Casey."

Hope stared blankly at him. Raph's girl? Was she still his girl? Would she even be able to forgive him for this? She decided to wait until she'd seen and talked to him before making this decision.

The pain in her face felt like it had swollen to twice the size. Her eyes felt sunken in, like she was constantly looking through a tunnel.

She fished out some words and strung them together to get her point across. "Where… is… he…?" The fact that she was almost incoherent made it difficult for the others to detect the tone in which she'd spoken.

Casey took off his hat and ran his fingers through his head. "He's in the waiting room. They aren't pressing charges against him yet, but… he's nervous about coming in here." He hesitated a moment. "Listen, he feels awful about what happened. Can I get him in here?"

It was difficult to know what to think. Now that the memory was back in full swing in her mind, Hope could recall the look on his face when he hit her. It was an accident, true, however, the way he just lost control terrified her. _He_ terrified her.

This wasn't what she wanted. She wanted to confront the guy who hurt Donnie, and find out what spurred his actions on. She found that out, and her mission was successful. She was grateful that Raph had rescued her, but at what cost?

She nodded her head slowly, letting Casey know that she was ready to see him.

* * *

Raph stared vacantly into his cup of coffee, now stone cold. He couldn't believe that this was happening. How could he have let this happen? He wanted to run back into the bar district and lose himself in booze, but he knew that Hope would never speak to him again if he did.

A light hand lay on his arm and he looked up to see Casey. He offered a reassuring smile, but Raph didn't feel reassured.

"She says you can go in, man." He frowned at the terrified look on his friend's face. "Raph, relax. She'll hear you out. Just be straight with her."

He swallows his nerves and followed Casey to her room. He had no idea what he was going to say. He pushed the door open, his heart bouncing around his chest like a hard rubber ball.

Hope glanced at Leo. "You-you're… going… to… leave… us… alone… right…?" She wheezed, struggling to get her words out.

The good thing about hardly being able to talk was, when he began to explain himself, she could listen without interruption.

A medley of thoughts went through her head. Would whatever he said be enough? Could she actually forgive this? Let him get away with it? It wasn't just the fact that he'd hurt her, it was his reaction. He went straight in for the kill, with no regard for himself or his future. Could she now have someone like that in _her_ future?

Leo nodded and he gestured for Mikey and Casey to follow. The door closed behind them and Raph hung back, hesitant to approach. He felt like a cornered animal, facing down a threat, except that he was the real threat. He had snapped and she had been caught in the cross-fire.

Her face was swollen and there were black rings under her eyes. He wanted to rush over to her and comfort her, but he could see the distrust in her eyes. Maybe she was right to look at him like that.

"How… How are you feeling?" He asked lamely, at a loss for anything better to say.

"Sore," she replied sharply. Now that he was in the room with her, anger started boiling within her veins. She had no idea that she was going to react this way and it took her mildly by surprise. Why was he making small talk? Where was his apology? She could see the anguish in his eyes, but she had real physical pain and it was his fault.

He could sense her annoyance, but he was so unsure of what to say. He had no excuses, so he decided to just be forward. He couldn't meet her eyes; he deserve to do that.

"Hope… I'm… I'm sorry. I didn't… I wasn't in control… All I could see was the bastard about to…" He closed his eyes, the memory still painful to think about. "I wanted to make him as afraid as you were. I wanted to keep you safe, but I fucked it up. I will never forgive myself for hurting you. _Never_."

Tears slipped down his cheeks, but he did nothing to hide them. He was so ashamed. He genuinely wanted to die for putting her here, and the way she looked at him physically hurt him.

"Thank you… for… saving me… Raph…" She forced out, pressing her hand to her face. She recoiled it in pain and let her tears flow freely down her cheeks. "But… I can't… do… this…" Her heart physically ached from her own words. She loved him, more than anything, however the trust was fading rapidly and if this is how he was going to react any time she was in danger, how could she stay? How could she be with him? Her chest convulsed with her sobs and all she wanted was to be in his arms.

His chest tightened as her words came home to him. She was turning him away because of his damned temper, just as he had feared. Maybe it was for the best. If he stayed, she would only get hurt again.

"I… I understand. I'll just… I'll leave you alone. I'm… I'm sorry."

He turned and left the room, shutting the door behind him. His heart was crumbling like a sandcastle that sat too close to the shore. It would have been better if he wasn't at fault, but it was. He barely heard his brothers' calling to him as he rushed out of the waiting room. He just needed to clear his head.

After he left, Hope thoroughly broke down. The beeping from her heart monitor was swiftly increasing. She covered her face and ignored the pain from her wounds. She curled herself up the best she could and sobbed violently. He was the only person she'd even fallen for, and now she was pushing him away? Because of an accident? Bile rose in her throat as her mind raced. Had she made a mistake? She was about to lose a huge part of her life, all because she got in the way? Now she cried harder, clutching at her chest, willing him to come back. She had no strength left, her breathing became labored and she wheezed out his name. She needed him. All she desired was for him to hold her close and mend her ruined core.

Mikey was torn between following Raph or going to comfort Hope. After a few seconds, he decided on going in to see Hope. She sounded all kinds of distraught and he knew that Casey could handle Raph. He had brought Raph out of plenty of dark places before.

He poked his head inside the room and saw her burying her head in her hands. He ran up to her bed and wrapped his arms around her and held her comfortingly.

"Hope, what happened? Tell me what's going on."

"I can't! I can't!" She bawled into his plastron, clinging tightly to him. She felt weirdly comforted by his scent, as it had an echo of Raph. She was relieved that with the parting between them, that she hadn't been completely abandoned by his family.

She finally managed to calm herself down, her body randomly convulsing on occasion as it rid her of tears. Words starting to converge in her mind and she chewed the inside of her mouth until she drew blood. Swallowing the salty liquid, she ran her tongue over the wound. It took her mind off the throbbing in her eyes and nose.

"I left him. I can't do this." She muttered, twisting her hair around her finger and pulling tightly.

Mikey suspected that this is what had happened. There hasn't been any other explanation for why both of them were so upset. Raph was passionate and felt things more deeply than any of his brothers, so his heart was breaking for him. But at the same time, Hope needed to think about herself. Even if Raph had hurt her accidentally, she had still been hurt, and she was trying to protect herself.

"Did Raph tell you about the invasion?" He asked softly. She nodded and he continued. "We were split up, and trying to find Master Splinter so we could get out of the city. When we found him, he was battling the Shredder, a really bad guy, and we saw him get hurt and thrown into a storm drain. Raph was freaking out, and he was pounding at the bars, trying to get to him. I tried to calm him down, he turned on me and tried to hit me. I stopped him, and convinced him that it was going to be okay."

He sat back and took her hands in his. Her hands were tiny and thin. No wonder Raph was so scared of hurting her.

"He was scared, and trying to cope with it. It was still scary, but he needed someone to pull him out of the dark place he was in. When he saw that guy about to hurt you, he wanted to save you, and he was afraid that he was too late. There might have been a better way, but he wanted to be there for you. I'm sorry that he scared you and that he hurt you, but please, don't think any worse of him for it."

She listened intently, head still pressed against his chest, nodding to show she was listening. When he reached the end she knew she'd made a mistake. But she must have hurt him so badly, and she knew he was stubborn. Would he accept her mistake?

"I was wrong," she stated numbly. "I need him."

Mikey grinned and squeezed her tight, conscious of her swollen face. "You need to tell him that. I can call him if you want," he said, pulling out his phone helpfully.

Hope quickly took his phone and dialled Raph's number. Placing the phone to her ear she waited for it to start ringing. What would she say? How would she convince him to come back? What if he refused? What if he'd decided he didn't want her anymore?

* * *

"Slow down Raph!"

Raph ignored Casey's entreaties as he pushed through the entrance of the hospital. He needed to leave him alone.

Casey just didn't get it. He had just screwed up the best thing that has ever happened to him, and he was smarting.

His phone buzzed on his belt, and he thought about ignoring it too. But Donnie's broken body appeared behind his eyes, and he picked up the phone. Maybe he had woken up? He looked down at the caller ID and saw it was Mikey calling him. He hit the green button and held up his phone. "This had better be about Donnie, you little piece of shit."

His harsh tone made her immediately hang up the phone and she flung it across the bed to its owner. She stared at her hands and shook her head, grasping at words in her mind. After a few moments, she'd complied a decision and she carefully spoke it out loud to Mikey.

"I'm going to let him cool off for a couple of days. If I take him back now, it's reinforcing that his negative behavior gets him what he wants." She exhaled gradually, bringing her eyes up to meet Mikey's. "And there's someone I need to see."

Mikey raised his eye ridges curiously. They were two stubborn people, so he knew it was better to just step back and let them figure this out on their own. "Who are you going to see?"

She pursed her lips, bringing them down to a thin, hard line. "The guy who hit Donnie." She knew he'd be around here somewhere, and she knew his name; it wouldn't be hard to find him.

Something odd was stirring inside her. It became a strong need to speak with him, to see what Raphael had done to him. It was unclear to her why she felt this way, but the urge was too strong.

"Help me find him?" She whispered to Mikey.

He thought about it for a moment before nodding. "Okay," he said. "I'll try to get it out of Casey. You're not planning on… You know… Getting even, are ya?"

Hope shot him a deeply offended look and narrowed her eyes. She replied sharply, obvious that she was not impressed with his tone. "Don't lump me into the same category as your brother." With that, she lay back down on the bed, turning her back to him, showing that the conversation was over.

Mikey felt twelve kinds of stupid for suggesting that she might be looking for revenge, but if it were him in that bed, that would be why he'd go looking for the creep. He stood and left her room, closing the door behind him.

Pulling out his phone, he called Casey. Raph was a thundercloud, but he was in at the lair, pounding the old punching bag into oblivion. That was good. Mikey preferred him to work out his sorrow and anger that way than in a smelly bar, or worse, in a chick's bed.

He asked where he could find the guy that hit Donnie and attacked Hope, then had to explain why he wanted to know. It turned out that they were in the same hospital, though he was surrounded by police detail and was handcuffed to his bed. He ended the call and wandered into Donnie's room. He'd give Hope the information tomorrow. When she'd cooled off a little.


	11. Chapter 11

Sleep was almost impossible that night. Even though she'd now been given a whole new dose of morphine, the pain in her heart could not be dulled by any amount of medication.

Her thoughts spun around Raph and his hurt look when he walked out the hospital room, but she had the most horrible feeling in the pit of her stomach that he'd done something stupid.

Every time she closed her eyes she saw Matthew's face leering at her, touching her body and kissing her neck. She'd wake up in a cold sweat and tears rolling down her cheeks. It ended up better for her just to lie there, staring at the ceiling.

Eventually a light flickered on and a small, plump nurse busied herself around Hope's bed. She did various tests, and started scribbling down the results on a clip board.

"It looks like you should be allowed home today, sweetheart." The nurse smiled sweetly at her and left.

Hope sighed and swung her legs off the side of the bed. Her toes touched the cold ground and she lifted herself up to stretch her legs. She hoped Mikey had lived up to his promise. She still needed to find out what was going through that sicko's mind.

* * *

Mikey hesitated for a moment before tapping lightly on Hope's door. The little nurse at the station had said she was being released, so he wanted to be cautious in case she was changing clothes.

Hope's voice bade him to enter and he pushed the door open. She was pulling her yellow jacket on and shaking out her long blonde hair. Her face was still swollen, but overall, she looked much better.

"Good morning. You hungry?" He asked, thinking that he could take her to get some breakfast if she hadn't.

Her face lit up at his potential proposal. "Starving! Apparently there's no chance of breakfast once you've been discharged," she jested, bringing him into a tight embrace. "Did you find him?" She whispered desperately into his ear. She wasn't going to beat around the bush. This had to be sorted. Now.

Mikey nodded, still unsure if this was a good idea. "Yeah… He's a few floors down, surrounded by policemen. You know, because he's under arrest for attempted murder and attempted rape and all that." He tried to smile, but somehow he didn't feel it.

She nodded sullenly, still in two minds about speaking to him. If Mikey was right and he was under arrest, surely that should be enough for her? But she couldn't help feeling there was more to him than what met the eye.

Then she had to know something else. "H-how's Raph…?" She asked feeling nervous about the reply.

He grimaced. "He's hurting, but he didn't run off like he normally would. He stayed with Casey, blew off some steam with his punching bag, stuff like that." He gave her a half smile. "Casey said that Raph talked about going out, but that he talked more about how you wouldn't have liked that. It's like he's trying to make himself better now that… You guys broke up."

 _Broke up_. Mikey's words cut through her like a knife. She hadn't even thought about it like that. She just wanted to let him cool down so they could talk properly. Was this really the actual end for them? Would she ever see him again?

She swallowed hard, but her throat felt like sand paper. Taking a shaky breath she returned Mikey's weak smile and bit her lower lip, holding back the waterfall that was threatening to burst from her eyes.

"I just hope he'll be okay… Do you- do you think, he'd… um… speak to me… now? Ever?" she hesitated and started walking briskly to the reception desk to check out. "Forget it. It's fine. Let's go get breakfast," she mumbled as she left, feeling embarrassed that she'd even asked.

Mikey watched her go, his heart twisting with sympathy. He knew that she regretted her actions and he knew that Raph still loved her. He had to do something. Time for Cupid to strap on his wings.

He pulled out his phone and sent a message to Casey, explaining what he had in mind. He had just put his phone away when Hope returned.

"Have you ever had kolaches?" He asked with a cheeky grin.

Mikey's childlike demeanor put her at ease and she suddenly felt relaxed. She chuckled at him, hoisting her bag up onto her shoulder. "I can safely say that I have not!" She jested. "Lead the way."

* * *

He escorted her to a café six blocks from the hospital and led her inside. There was a strong smell of coffee and pastries in the air as he held up two fingers to the waitress. He looked over toward the back of the diner and grinned.

"Never mind, I see some of our friends back there."

In the corner booth sat Casey and a sullen looking Raph. He caught Casey's eye and he rose, saying something to Raph, probably that he was running to the bathroom. Mikey looked over at Hope, hoping that she wouldn't bolt like a scared rabbit.

Hope had clocked Raph and she turned to Mikey. "You're quick," she stated and watched the heartbroken turtle sipping on his drink. He didn't seem to be looking up, so she slowly walked towards him. Once she reached the table, she put her hand on the chair opposite. "Anyone sitting here?" She asked, unable to wipe the smile off her face.

Raph looked up, startled at her sudden appearance. She was just as beautiful as she had ever been and for a moment, he couldn't say a word. _Come on, Raph! She asked you a question, bonehead!_

"N-No. Go ahead."

"Apparently I'm getting kolaches…" she grinned, tilting her head towards Mikey, who stood beaming at them both. "He looks pretty proud of himself. What excuse did Casey give you…?" She asked while taking the seat and eyeing him.

He looked terrible, she was sure he hadn't slept at all. Then again neither had she, but her bags of sleep deprivation were hidden by her black eyes. The knuckles on his hands were torn and bruised from the pummeling he'd given Matthew. His eyes seemed sunken in and red raw from crying. He was a state.

But all she wanted to do was hold him, stroke his shell and tell him it was all going to be alright.

He gave her a knowing half smile. "He just said we should get some coffee before going to see Donnie. Donuts might have been in the conversation somewhere. You want some kolaches?"

Her face was still bruised and swollen, and she looked like she hadn't slept well either.

"How are you feeling? I know… Sore, but other than that?" Why was he such a complete ass? He didn't blame her for kicking him to the curb. What he didn't understand was why she hadn't left as soon as Mikey had brought her in.

"Sure… If you're willing to tell me what they are…" she arched an eyebrow at him and scrunched up her nose. "And, I'm alright… you know…" she trailed off, wishing that she could just throw her arms around him. She refrained however, as she didn't know how he would react. And that still scared her.

"They're like savory donuts, with meat and cheese inside." He chuckled and shook his head. "God, I'm starting to sound like Mikey."

He stared into his mug for a moment, trying to work up his nerve. He saw how nervous she was and he thought that she was still afraid of him. "I'm sorry. For everything. I'm sorry that I didn't go with you to the guy's apartment, that I lost my head, and that I…" He couldn't finish his apology. He wanted to hold her close to prove how sorry we really was, but he was sure she wouldn't want him to touch her. Not now, and maybe never again.

"Go and get the food," Hope instructed, her eyes failing to meet his. "Then we can talk, okay?" She really did want to talk things over with him, but her stomach was growling like an angry bear, and she knew she wouldn't be able to keep her mind straight while she was running on empty.

"Right… Okay…" He held up a hand and gave the waitress their order, along with a couple of fresh coffees. They sat in awkward silence for a few minutes before the food arrived.

Hope was the first to break the uncomfortable lull. She pushed the food around on her plate before taking a large bite and swallowing. "Look. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have reacted the way I did. I know it wasn't your fault, exactly. But you have to understand, it isn't easy for me… to see you like that…"

"I know… My bros have said that before. That I can be a real animal." He forced himself to look up into her blackened eyes. "But when I saw that guy… How he'd violated you… I couldn't help it. I just snapped."

He took one of the kolaches and took a bite. It tasted like cardboard on his tongue, though it smelled delicious. "You're right. I was ready to kill him. But I shouldn't have taken it that far."

"Raphael… I don't want to lose you…" She mumbled staring intently at her plate. Her words weren't enough. She had to let him know that he wasn't forgiven, that he couldn't have any more chances. That he terrified her when he lost control. She raised her eyes to his, and she could already see that it didn't need to be spoken out loud. He already knew.

"I don't want to let you go either. But I know… You don't trust me. I don't deserve to be trusted, but…" He swallowed, trying to keep himself together. "I want to do what's best for you. I'll be okay, no matter what you decide."

She wanted to contradict him, however he was correct. Trust was to be earned, and he needed to do just that. "I've called in a favor from Casey… I'm able to go in and see… Matthew. I want you to come with me." She told him, ready for a flurry of dismissals.

Raph's eyes widened with disbelief. She actually wanted to see that creep? She must be out of her mind, but he was not going to let her go take this guy on her own again.

"What are you wanting to do? What possible reason could you have for wanting to see him?"

Hope sighed irritably. No one seemed to be able to comprehend why she needed to do this. "You don't understand, Raph. I'm a scientist, everything I say or do is carefully calculated down to a T. I need to know what is going on in his head. That's why I went round there. His excuse for knocking down Donnie wasn't sufficient. There's something else going on, and I need to know."

She was right, he didn't understand. Not at all. But she was asking him to trust her, and if he wanted her to trust him again, the least he could do was to do the same for her.

"All right, let's go." He placed a twenty on the table and stood.

* * *

All four of them arrived at the hospital again. Hope told Mikey to go check on Donnie, she didn't want him to be around for this. Casey directed them to the room and they waited outside for his signal to enter.

While they waited, Hope reached out and took Raph's hand. It felt like an eternity since she'd touched his skin and it set her at ease immediately.

Her soft touch filled his body with warmth and he closed his fingers around hers. It felt right, but he felt like he wasn't worthy to be so close. Casey turned away from the other officer he had been speaking to and faced them.

"I gotta go in with you. Raph… You gotta stay by the door. Since you and he have… history, you can't get close to him. You ready?" He said to Hope. When she nodded, he led them inside the room.

Matt lay on the bed, his face wrapped in bandages and his arm handcuffed to the bed.

"Well… If it ain't… The bitch and the frog…" he said with a sneer. Raph bit the inside of his cheek so hard that he tasted blood. But he kept his fists down. He needed to stay calm.

Hope looked to Raph and saw that he was behaving. This was a good sign. She cautiously stepped up to the bed. He had been very badly beaten, and even though she didn't approve of Raph's actions, she didn't feel any sort of remorse. She sat in the soft chair next to his bed, and crossed her legs, to show she had no intention of leaving.

"Matthew. Now that you're restrained and can't, heh, force yourself on me, and Raph is on his last warning, I thought maybe we can finally have that talk that I wanted." This speech had been planned out from the beginning, but had been cut short when the whole incident occurred. Now, she was determined to let it play out.

Matt looked over her, obvious hunger in his eyes, but Raph knew that he couldn't move. The sooner Hope got this curiosity out of her system, the better.

"I already told you… Those freaks don't need to be up here with normal people, like us. Though I'm sure you have more use for them than I would. Did you fuck her yet, turtle?" he said, turning his attention toward Raph. "Did she scream for ya? Bet she sucked you off too. She make you feel special, freak?"

He was trying to get under Raph's skin, and it was working. He could hear the growling in his throat, but he needed to keep his temper. As long as Hope was here, he would stay. But he hoped she would hurry.

Hope shook her head and laughed at his response. "He's not going to budge, man. So don't even bother. You obviously have some issues with mutants. So let's see what that could be?" She scratched her chin for a moment before continuing. Her relaxed posture and confident words were intentional, in order to get inside his head. "Alright, let's look at this logically. You said that they have no business being here, so that definitely insinuates some sort of complex. Perhaps, you feel threatened by their presence. Did a mutant beat you out of a job, maybe…?" She paused and looked him dead in the eye, looking for some sort of reaction.

Matt rolled his eyes. "You're trying to psychoanalyze me, you crazy slut? Fine.. I don't have anything to hide. I'm going to jail anyway. I'm in the same program as the freak in school. He'd been acing the class while I was fighting for a C+… It wasn't right!"

He glared at Raph with pure loathing. "I've had to fight for everything I've ever gotten, and the freak just waltzes in and gets it so easily. It made me sick. I had to do something about it. And before you ask… I ain't sorry. I'd do it again, if I got the chance."

The way that this guy spoke was grating against Raph's raw nerves. He wanted to finish the job he had started, make him pay for all of the pain he had caused, but one look at the back of Hope's head brought him back to himself. He clenched his fists and started reciting the times tables in his head. Anything to get his raspy voice out of his head.

"You're kidding me, right? You want to murder someone because they get better grades than you? You do understand just how pathetic that sounds?" She wasn't backing down, he'd started to open up now, even if he didn't realize it. "Donatello is smart. Crazy smart. Just because you can't cut it, does not mean you have to end his life. Man, you'd be getting bad grades even if he wasn't in your class." She stopped, sensing his anger bubbling over. But she was almost there. "Anything else…?"

"What can I say? I'm a purist," the guy said with a smug shrug. "Now if you don't mind, I'm tired. Your fuckboy really gave me a splitting headache."

Raph was angry that he would rudely dismiss her, but relieved at the same time that they could leave soon.

"I've got all I need anyway, thank you, Matthew." Hope said politely, rising from her chair. "My conclusion: you're jealous," she stated and, before he could get another nasty word in, she brushed past Raph and exited the room.

Raph rushed after her, catching up to her by the nurse's station.

"Hope? Are you okay?" He asked, concerned about the outraged look on her face.

"He has… nothing against mutants…" She concluded. "He's a nasty piece of work, but he has an inferiority complex. He's just picking on mutants because they get more attention than him. He-" she waved her hand around in the air, "is nothing more than a child, crying out to be noticed." Her mission was successful and she suddenly beamed at Raph. "You were amazing. I am so proud of you." She finally brought her arms around his neck and deeply breathed in that scent that she'd longed for over the past couple of days.

He breathed a sigh of relief as he wrapped his arms around her slim figure. She smelled so nice, but he still wasn't sure how far she would let him go. He hadn't earned back her trust yet, but he wasn't finished.

"Thanks Hope… I'm trying to be better about that."

He stood up and looked her right in the eyes. "I didn't get to tell you… But I found you a volunteer."

She pulled back and held him at arm's length. "You did?! How? What? When? Who?!" She spluttered. After the last days events she'd almost forgotten about her research and what she'd asked him to do.

"I'll bring him around to your place, tomorrow okay? He said he needed some time to get ready." He hesitated, then reached out and took her hand in his and squeezed them. "Um… I didn't get a lot of sleep last night… You mind if I go home for a while?"

Hope nodded enthusiastically. "Of course, I didn't either… I'll get a cab home." She let go of him and turned to the door to leave. Something was missing. Even though she knew it would take a while for them to get fully back to some sort of normality, she needed to let him know that she still cared. Just like he did when he first kissed her.

She turned around and bolted back to him, grabbing onto his shoulders and lifting her body up by her toes. She planted a kiss on his lips, tasting his mouth, missing the feeling. Breaking off, but not removing her mouth from his, she whispered, "I love you, Raph. I hope we'll be okay."

The elation that he felt when she kissed him almost made the hell of the last few days' worth it. He pulled her in close and kissed her harder, as if it were the last thing he would ever do.

"I hope so too, baby. I'm going to do everything I can to make it all up to you. I promise." He gave her one last kiss then left for home. It was going to be a long night.

* * *

It felt like forever since she'd been home and it almost seemed alien to her when she stepped inside. The cold chill of the lab hit her hard and she quickly changed for bed and buried herself in the blankets. The dull ache from her bruised face began to emerge and she swallowed a couple of her pain relieving candies to numb the sensation. Finally, she drifted off into a deep sleep.

 _She awoke much later on with a sense of dread looming over her. She snapped open her eyes to find Matthew leering at her hungrily, his hands reaching towards her neck. She tried to scream out for help, but her voice had been muted. He slowly wrapped his hands around her neck, bringing himself down to her level. She was completely paralyzed, no matter how hard she tried to struggle, he just pushed his thumbs into her windpipe deeper. Everything felt lost now and she felt the life escape her._

A loud scream suddenly brought her back to reality. It took her a moment to realize that it was her own. She rolled over defensively ready to strike out, but she was entirely alone. A cold sweat had drenched her body and she was breathing as though she'd just run a marathon. Her heart was hammering wildly within her chest, threatening to break free of her rib cage.

It was just a nightmare, one she knew she'd never be rid of.


	12. Chapter 12

Raph knocked on the door of Hope's lab early the next morning. He balanced a couple of coffees and a bag of bagels in his arm as he waited for her to open the door.

He'd been considering volunteering to test the serum for her for some time. Yesterday, when she was tackling her demons, he had decided for sure. He needed to do this for her. To prove that he trusted her and to show that he could be trusted in turn.

Hearing the familiar rap on her door, Hope quickly tied her hair up and fixed her lab coat. She was excited to meet the person who she would be testing her serum on. It was weird, she felt like she had a connection with him already.

She had organized the test syringes in a line, ready for the experiment. That morning, after being unable to sleep due to the dreams that plagued her mind, she'd done a few more alpha tests on her dead frogs. Everything was looking up, and the odd miniature humans showed no signs of side effects.

She pulled the door open and saw Raph standing there with breakfast. "Hi." She grinned at his presence. Looking behind him, she expected to see some nervous looking mutant, but there was none to be found. "Where's the volunteer? Is he running late?" She enquired, eyeing him quizzically.

He suddenly felt very awkward and he grinned sheepishly. "Well… You're looking at him. And he's brought breakfast." He held up his offering for her to see.

Her jaw fell open and she gawked at him for a long time before she managed to form a coherent sentence. "Y-you…?" The color had drained from her face, leaving her two darkened eyes very prominent. "You?" She repeated again, unable to comprehend what he was saying. "I don't… under…stand…?"

"I talked about it with Leo and Mikey a lot last night. They… don't really think it's a great idea, but this is important to you, and I want to do this." He stepped inside and set his bag and one of the coffees onto her table. "If you think that it works, that's good enough for me." He sat down in the chair, his nerves stretched taut, waiting to see what she would say.

Finally snapping back to reality, Hope followed him to the chair. "Raph… I won't do this. This is your _life_ we're talking about here." She knelt down by his side and placed her tiny hand on his knee. "You can't do this just because of me. Your brothers are right. It is not a great idea. I don't think you fully understand the ramifications of what I'm asking you to do…"

"No, Hope. I do understand. If it works, I'll be human. If it doesn't, I won't. But you proved that it works on mutants like me, and I trust you." He took her hands, tracing her delicate fingers gently. "Hope, you asked me to find you a volunteer, and I did… Please… Let me do this for you. Trust me to make decisions for myself."

"Just, give me a second." She told him, heading in the direction of her bathroom. She sat down on the cracked toilet bowl and placed her face into her hands.

He seemed to have already made his decision. Was it really hers to control? It was his life, after all. But she was now part of it. Granted, she hadn't fallen for him because he was a mutant, but he sure had some charm about him. Was that just him? Or what that because he was a turtle? She thought back to trace his shell with her fingers and the feelings it gave him. Could she give that up? Could _he_? She'd never thought about what he may look like as a human, and it frightened her. If it didn't work, he wouldn't simply stay a mutant, he might become deformed, brain damaged, or even die. She needed to explain this to him, before he went ahead.

She returned many minutes later, with a camera in her hand. "If you do this. I want to remember what you look like now." She stated and advanced towards him.

He grinned, grateful that she wasn't fighting him on this. "Only if you're in the picture with me." Pulling her into his lap, he kissed her neck gently and took the camera out of her hand. He held the camera high and snapped a couple of selfies.

"Okay… So you need me to sign any waivers or something like that?"

"Raph… You do understand that if this doesn't work, you could die?" She told him firmly, fishing out the contract that she'd drawn up for the procedure. She held it tightly, checking his reaction to see if it had changed any.

He took the piece of paper out of her hands and read it carefully. There were a lot of things that could go wrong, but there were a hundred things that could go wrong when he and his brothers went out on patrol. This was no different to him. He picked up the pen from the table and signed the bottom with an every sense of finality.

"So then…" He said, looking up at her. "When do we start?"

She blinked a couple of times at him. He was really doing this. "A-alright. I need you to lie down, here." She gestured towards her examining table, which she'd sterilized and covered with large sheets of tissue paper. Hanging at the sides were four large, leather restraints. "I need to strap you in. It's... not going to be a pleasant experience…" She told him dully. "Then I inject the serum into your main arteries, that will make the whole concoction spread into your blood stream. After a few minutes, it will break down your mutant DNA, the cells will die. And you should be left… human."

Raph's chest tightened with nerves as he lay back on his carapace and allowed her to strap him down.

"Ha, this is kinda kinky, huh babe?"

She grinned, her nerves evident in her own face as she walked back over to the table. Truth be told, he was scared, but he trusted that she was going to take care of him, no matter what happened.

The syringe looked huge in her minute hand. She turned to his face and gave him one last kiss on the lips. "I'll see you on the other side… This is going to hurt. A lot." She warned. It was going to be an awful experience, she knew this. To see him hurting was going to break her. But there was no backing out now.

She pushed the lever on the syringe until a few drops of serum dribbled out the end, then tapping firmly with her fingers, the last of the air bubbles dissipated. She brought her free hand down to his forearm, pressing firmly until she found her spot. "Okay." She breathed, ridding herself of nerves and focus solely on her patient. She pressed the nib of the needle into his skin and plunged the handle down, releasing the first wave of serum. She repeated the process over and over until she'd emptied all twenty of the syringes. Now all she could do was monitor him as the process took hold.

He was beginning to feel like a pin cushion, but the lingering memory of her kiss helped him keep his courage. For at least a minute, nothing happened. He wondered how bad it would-

Fire coursed through his veins and his skin felt like it had been doused by chemicals. The pain was much worse than when the brain worm burrowed into his eye. He gnashed his teeth but the screams tore through from his throat anyway. He really did feel like he was dying.

"Hope! Gah!"

He struggled against his bonds, but he lay immobile. Every inch of his body felt like it was expanding then shrinking; fiery hot, then ice cold. He bucked violently as his shell started to crack loudly. God, this was even worse than he could possibly imagine! Finally, his strength failed him and his body twitched violently. Darkness swallowed him whole and finally, the pain stopped.

Hope was completely powerless, now that the serum had taken hold, all she could do was stand back and watch as his mutant cells broke down and died.

Her heart felt physically too big for her chest and tears streamed down her face in waves. She checked his vitals and he seemed to be doing alright, but that was no comfort for hearing his anguished screams of pain almost brought her to her knees.

But she needed to stay strong; she was working. When he finally shuddered to a stop, she looked over to him. "Raph…?" The eerie silence made her feel sick.

His dreams were fractured full of people, places, thoughts and feelings that he didn't know. He felt cold… So cold. It felt like he was falling down a mine shaft and there was no bottom. Just black.

Slowly, the light returned and his eyes slid open. He looked around trying to remember where he was. Nothing… There was nothing…. He didn't remember a thing. Not his name, not where he was or why he was here. He had no past, only the present.

He tried to move, but his hands were secured to the table. He had large hands, tanned with callouses. He looked down and flushed when he realized that he had no clothes on… And there was a beautiful blonde woman staring at him.

He was awake. He had survived. Hands shaking, Hope quickly checked his vitals and whooped when everything was normal. It had worked.

She had to compose herself to take a proper look at him. Covering his modesty with a towel, she started to check him over, pressing down on his tough skin, hoping there was no pain.

His human skin had a pea green tinge to it, like he was recovering from food poisoning. She knew this would soon regress to a healthy pink glow once his pigments had realigned. His body shape and muscles hadn't changed, he was just as big as he'd been as a turtle, minus the shell, and… turtle features. He was void of all hair; that needed time to grow, after all, the serum only deleted the mutant cells, it didn't grow human ones. It was the same for his finger and toe nails. The dead cells surrounded him in a bed of ash. She couldn't have imagined just how painful it was for him.

One thing remained of his old identity, and she placed his red mask in his large human hand.

"I didn't know if you wanted to keep it…" She smiled, gazing down at his still beautiful face.

He was slightly uncomfortable that this strange woman would be poking and prodding him like a science experiment, but her big blue eyes were kind and her touch was gentle. He cleared his throat and tried to speak, though his voice felt weak.

"Who… Who are you?"

Her blood turned to ice in her veins. Why would he ask that? "It's me, Raph. Hope. Your girlfriend?" She started to panic and shone a bright light in his eyes, checking his dilation. She couldn't understand, everything was normal. "Raphael? What can you remember?" She asked him, stunned, hoping that this was a temporary side effect.

Raphael… That was his name. He felt relieved that he now knew something. "I… Don't remember anything," he said, shaking his head. "Everything's a blank. I'm sorry. You're my… Girlfriend?"

"What have I done…?" She whispered numbly, staring at his blank expression. Shaking hands undid the restraints so that he could sit up. She studied his new features. Luckily his eyes were the same vivid green, however he now had a nose and ears. His human hands and skin remained calloused like before, his old battle scars still visible on the tainted green canvas.

She was at a loss of what to do. Was this permanent? She helped him off the table in silence, unaware of what was to be said. Wrapping the towel around his waist, she took his hands in hers and directed him to a chair. "You remember nothing of your life…?" She quizzed.

He thought for a long time, trying to remember something… Anything… But everything was a complete blank. "Nothing."

He was disturbed by her look of devastation. He wanted to comfort her, so he stood and pulled her into his arms. It felt right somehow, standing with her like this. He wished he did remember her.

Being in his arms made her start to sob delicately. It felt odd to not be pressed up to his hard plastron, but a softer skinned chest. It still felt like he was hers.

She broke away from him, disappearing for a moment with a stack of neatly folded clothes. She'd no idea who the volunteer was going to be and how big or small they'd turn out, so she'd stocked up on various sizes of male clothing. Holding them up to him, checking the sizes, she finally settled on a large, grey hooded jumper, black T-shirt and faded blue jeans. She dressed him while he stood, like a mother caring for her child. She placed a set of green trainers on his feet and did up the laces.

"Sit down," She instructed, marveling at her work. He looked so odd in clothes. "I need to help you remember."

Raphael settled in the chair, curious what the woman… _no, her name was Hope_ , would say. She looked so sad, like she had just lost her best friend. Had he been that friend? What had happened that had stripped him of his identity?

She had said she was his girlfriend. Could he have won the heart of such a beautiful, kind woman? He must be some kind of hero to have done that. Can't have been for how he looked. His skin was green and he had no hair, not even any eyebrows!

She pulled up a chair and sat next to him, tears still brimming in her eyes. She wanted to hold him, kiss him, tell him how much she loved him and what he meant to her. However if this was true and he had no recollection of his life, she might frighten him with being so forward.

Slowly, Hope began to explain his story right from the very beginning. It was a rehashed version, as she'd only heard the story from his own lips. But she battled on the best she could. Telling him all about his mutation, his family, the adventures, how they met, how they'd fallen in love, all about her work and what she had achieved with the experiment. She talked for hours, bringing him fully up to date. He didn't interrupt, he didn't falter, he listened carefully to her every word.

She pulled out the digital camera from her pocket and showed him the last photo that he'd taken before the change. "This is what you looked like…" She told him, pointing at the mutant turtle in the photo. It felt like a spear had pierced her heart as she looked at the photo. She missed him already, even though he was supposedly right next to her.

He stared at the photograph for a long time, forcing himself to remember the face of the monster he saw. They looked really happy. He wondered if it could really be true. It was a lot of him to believe, but he didn't have many other options than to believe this her story.

He was so confused. He wanted to be angry with her that she had stolen his life from him, but that would mean knowing what he missed. He had to focus on the here and now.

"That… That is a lot to take in…" He said, rising from the chair. Suddenly, his head swam and his legs buckled under him. He felt so weak that he fell asleep with his face pressed to the floor.

Raph was far too heavy to move, so Hope opted to cover him with her blanket and seek some help. She wasn't sure how the others would react, especially since they'd warned him that it was a bad idea. Pulling out her phone, she nervously dialed Leo's number and waited for him to answer.

* * *

Leo was there within ten minutes. His heart pounded like a bass drum and his head was in a whirl. He didn't know what to think, but fury clouded every rational thought.

He and Mikey had tried to talk him out of it. They had pled with him, making various points, but he hadn't listened. The stubborn idiot had gone and done it anyway. He blamed Hope, not for not talking him out of it, but for planting the idea in his head and making him feel like he had something to prove.

He pushed through the door without ceremony, and saw Hope sitting on the ground next to a sleeping man, covered by a thin quilt. She was stroking the top of his head in a way that betrayed his identity. That, and the light green hue of his skin.

"So you two did it…" He said, trying to keep the quiver of rage out of his voice.

She looked up as Leo burst into her lab. He had an air of rage about him, she wasn't sure who it was in aid of, but she suspected she was about the get an earful.

"Leo, listen," she started before he could carry on any further. "I told him everything. I told him there could be side effects. He wanted to do it any way. You know what he's like. It was hard to say no to him." She continued stroking his head, wondering if he was even the same man she fell in love with.

"He would have jumped into a volcano if it would have helped you with your 'research'!" He spat venomously. "And he felt so awful about putting you in the hospital and that you broke it off with him about it that he felt like he needed to prove himself to you again!"

Leo tried to control his ire, knowing it wouldn't help anything. They'd made their decision, and now… It was the same Raph that lay before him, but it was the other thing that she had told him that really upset him. He was like a blank slate. Everything from his past life was gone… Master Splinter, his brothers, even himself.

She looked like she was about to cry, and he instantly felt ashamed of his outburst. Raph had done this to himself. He shouldn't be spitting accusations at everyone else.

"I'm sorry… That was uncalled for." He stopped down and cradled his brother in his arms. "Where should I put him?"

Deeply shocked by Leo's reaction even though he'd apologized, Hope began to cry. It was all her fault, he was right. Now she wasn't able to reverse the process and he might not even be the same person.

Turning her head so that Leo couldn't see her tear stained face, she mumbled, "Just over here, put him on my bed." She gestured towards the mattress in the corner of the large room.

Leo gently placed his sleeping brother on the mattress and just stared at him for a minute. It was so surreal, seeing him like this. His face was very similar, except for the nose and ears. He just couldn't believe that he had taken such a chance.

He lifted his eyes to her face and felt his heart break even more. She couldn't have known that this would have happened. He was sure that she would take this from Raph if she could, but she was just as helpless as Leo.

"He didn't recognize you at all?" He asked in a tiny voice.

She solemnly hung her head. "No. He didn't even know his own name." She bent back down next to him and kissed his forehead. "I told him all about his life, hoping that he'd have some sort of recollection, but…" her voice cracked them and she broke down, her body falling over his. She wrapped herself around him as if this might make him remember. "Leo-" She choked out, "I don't… know… what to do…"

He waited for her to quiet, very unsure of what to do himself. When she finally calmed, he knelt down so that she could see his face clearly.

"Hope… He's still alive. Where there's life, there's hope. That's something Master Splinter used to tell us. Maybe his memories are still in there somewhere, and he just needs to heal. This," he gestured toward Raph, "must have taken a lot out of him, and he might just need some time."

"I-I-I think you should… take him… home…" She chanced another look at the sleeping man. He was so deeply rested that he hadn't heard her anguished sobs or felt her body over his. "That's where he needs to wake up. Home. It might force him to… to remember."

She didn't want to leave him. However she knew deep down that this was the best thing for him. Perhaps being in a familiar place might shock his memories into action. She was convinced that his life was hidden down there somewhere, and that with the right prompting, he'd finally remember.

But with every passing minute, her heart splintered, sending a new shard into the void.

Leo nodded and stood. He'd driven the Party Wagon to her lab so getting Raph home wouldn't be difficult. But it was just he and Mikey at home… With Donnie in the hospital and April there with him, there was no one with medical knowledge there. Except Hope had said she had studied to be a doctor.

"Would you… come with us? To take care of him? Mikey and I don't know how to work a lot of the medical equipment. Just in case there's something else that goes wrong?"

* * *

The lair was eerily quiet at this time of day. By now it was early evening and when Hope and Leo arrived back at the sewer, Raph limp in his brother's arms, there wasn't a soul to be seen.

Of course, Hope had taken Leonardo up on his offer of letting her stay with them. The very thought of leaving her love tugged at her heart strings.

They lay him in his own bed for the time being, just until they could figure out what the best course of action for monitoring him would be. At this point, Hope thought it best just to let him sleep.

"Maybe he'll remember everything when he wakes up." She mumbled more to herself than Leo, as they sat on the couch in the pit. She'd curled up in herself, arms cupping her knees and was rocking slowly back and forth.

Leo hoped that she was right. He didn't understand a lot of this stuff, so he desperately wanted to trust her judgement.

* * *

Raph woke up about three hours later, dazed and disoriented. He stumbled out of his room, calling for Hope. Leo caught up with him first. "Raph, it's okay, man. You're home."

Raph's green eyes filled with terror at the sight of the giant turtle. "Get away from me!" He threw a punch at his head, which was easily dodged.

The ruckus jolted Hope out of the small nap that she was attempting to have. Turning her gaze to the two, and piecing together what had just taken place, she bounded out of the pit and up to them.

"Raph! It's okay!" She held her hands up to him defensively, like taming an ornery horse. "This is Leonardo. He's… your brother. Remember? I told you about him?" She kept her voice soft and calming, trying to make him see sense.

The fact that Raph had lashed out at Leo made Hope's mind whir. If this was his natural reaction to being frightened by something, then maybe part of his original self was hidden deep within.

Raph took a better look at the turtle man standing before him. His blue eyes were filled with sadness as he stretched out his hand. He stared at the deformed hand suspiciously for a moment before taking it.

Mikey bolted from the kitchen in that moment and tackled Raph, swallowing him in an enormous hug. Immediately, he threw him off and backed toward Hope.

"This… This is too much… I need to get out of here… Hope? Please?" His voice was strained with uncertainty and fear.

Hope's heart sank. She had managed to convince herself that when he woke up, he'd remember everything. That wasn't the case. She truly believed that having him back home would help him, but that seemed to be hindering him further.

"Okay. Come on." She gave Leo and Mikey apologetic glances and ushered Raph out of the sewers.

As they walked down the street, she looked at his empty hand, desperate to take a hold of it like normal, but she didn't know how he would react anymore.

"Raph…? Why did Leo's appearance frighten you so much…?" She asked, curious as to why mutants could have struck such fear in his mind. After all, mutants were roaming about the world now, and had been for years. What made it so abnormal for him, now that he'd lost his memory?

"I… I don't know," he admitted. "It just wasn't… right. Yeah, he looked like the turtle man from your picture, but I'm not that guy. I'm like you, so I want to be with people like me."

He felt the sudden urge to grab her hand and he acted on it. It wasn't romantic; he barely knew this girl, but she felt safe, and he needed something stable to hold on to.

Feeling his human hand wrapped around her own sent chills down her spine. She knew this man was Raph… But _her_ Raph… He had three fingers and their awkward hand hold had become normal to her. To have all their fingers fit perfectly together, made her feel uncomfortable. Still, she felt happy that he was beginning to trust her.

However his words about 'people like him', gritted through her like sand. This was not the man she fell in love with. She didn't want him to become some speciesist person like her parents, or Matthew.

"Raph… Mutants have rights too. They are part of the society. You struggled a lot with that before… Your brothers… They love you."

The way she had said this puzzled him. Did she think he hated them? The whole thing was just new and strange to him. He didn't hold any malice towards the turtles… He just didn't could accept them as being real yet.

"You say they're my brothers… But I don't know them. They're just strangers to me. It has nothing to do with them being mutants."

Relief flooded through her. "Well that's okay then… I've… um… not really told you everything… There's a lot you don't know. Especially about me." While telling him all about his life, she had omitted her own terrible experiences regarding her parents, brother and the dealings with Matthew. She also decided it would be best to leave out the main details about Donatello and his 'accident'.

As soon as the fourth brother's face popped into her mind, she knew what they had to do next.

"There's someone you need to meet."


End file.
